The Shadow
by BuveurDeSang
Summary: Harry's 'perfect life' is disrupted when he overhears the prophecy the summer before 4th year. His entire world begins spinning out of control as he does everything he can to protect the ones he loves, and goes on a mission to make sure the prophecy comes
1. My 'perfect' life

Brisngr –christopher paolini sept 20th 2008

AN: So this story is totally au just so you know, their will be violence in later chapters as well as lemons…it is rated M for a reason. Also just so you are aware this will be a harry/tonks story and in this one I know its not canon but I am making her only four years older than Harry. The jump from the prologue to chapter 1 may be slightly confusing but it will all be explained eventually.

**PROLOGUE**

The wind whipped around Severus Snape, causing him to shiver slightly as he briskly traveled down the road to the Hogs Head. Pulling his cloak tighter around his person Severus discreetly rubbed his left forearm through the fabric of his robe.

Tonight he would impress his master; he was going to spy on Albus Dumbledore, hopefully the old fool would say something compromising. He was so unbelievably tired of Lucius Malfoy always besting him; everyone always had too best him, well no more. Severus Tobias Snape was going to get the respect he was owed.

Severus knew Dumbledore would be in one of the private rooms on the upper level of the establishment. _This better be worth it. _Snape thought to himself. _If I came all this way from spinners end to watch the old coot JUST discuss trivial things with this supposed new teacher I will be royally pissed._

Reaching the top of the stairs Severus heard a deep hoarse smoky voice saying something in the furthest room, door slightly ajar. _I thought the teacher was supposed to be female…the old fools voice does not sound like that._

Almost a foot away from the door Severus could clearly make out the words. "…Neither can live while the other survives, the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches, born as the seventh month dies." Suddenly the voice stopped, Severus held his breath as seconds passed than the same voice except slightly higher and loosing all mystical qualities spoke again, "OH! Dumbledore sorry it seems I have forgotten your last question I do apologize, sometimes I space out." She lightly laughed, "Its part of he profession you know sometimes our inner eye calls to me at the most inappropriate times."

"My dear Sybil, it seems you are not the only forgetful one today it seems I myself have forgotten as well." Severus heard Dumbledore speaking, _who is he taking to, come on you parasites I want to know what you were talking about, this supposed power, my lord would be so pleased to know your plans. _"Honestly my dear, I find these interviews tedious, I believe a seer such as yourself would thrive at Hogwarts and you could impart your divination knowledge on our students."

Severus could hear the conversation continue but he was already stumbling backwards._ SEER! She was a seer! MERLIN! That was a prophecy. _Severus' train of thought was cut off by a burning sensation in his left forearm.

Hissing in pain, he spun around running out of the establishment. Usually he would never conduct himself in that manner but this was terribly important, and he just knew this would be his big ticket into the inner circle.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

**CHAPTER 1**

_Harry was burying his little head into his mums shoulder, he had never been anywhere but Potter Manor and he was afraid. He knew that they were going to see his uncles and aunt and lil cousins today, but his parents told him there were going to be lots of other people their too._

_He quickly looked over his mothers shoulder towards his father who was carrying his baby sister Ash. He felt his mother slowly open a door and a ton of noise came floating out towards him. He was scared but his dad always told him to be brave so he slowly lifted his head to look at where they were. _

_He felt his mums long fingers slide through his hair so he looked at her before he continued looking at the hallway he was in. "See its not so bad sweetheart, its only Sirius' house." His mum was smiling brightly at him and her green eyes were sparkling she looked so pretty he had to smile too._

_Than he remembered that she told him they were going to see Sirius today! Those were his favorite times of the month when Sirius, Remus, Peter, Alexa and the twins Rosalie and Orion would visit them at the manor. Realizing that his smile widened. "Really mum!" she nodded, "Do you think Sirius will be a dog today? Is my favorite!" He felt his mom start shaking cause she was laughing but before she could say something he heard his father raise his voice._

"_HARRY! I thought I was your favorite!" Harry looked over to his father who was looking at him with a scowl on his face. He had to admit he thought his father was amazing when he was a stag, but he LOVED dogs!_

_Harry noticed his lil sister Ash was giggling, and it made him feel fuzzy when she laughed so he knew he had to bug his father more. "Well" he looked between his mum, dad and sister, "I do like you, but your just not as fuzzy, and you don't look as cute!" _

_Harry who had not noticed his parents were still moving was shocked when he heard a lot more laughter than just his family. _

"_I always knew I looked better than you prongs! Its why I always had more dates!" Harry heard his uncle Sirius laughing really loud, he looked back to his dad who was frowning and sputtering trying to think of something better to say. Harry deciding he wanted Sirius turned around yelling "PADFOOT! Fuzzy time!" Harry's lil four-year-old body froze when he took in the surrounding area. _

_There were streamers and balloons everywhere and a big sign that said something he thought was happy birthday Rosalie and Orion. He also noticed on one half of the room their was a sea of redheads their had to at least be nine of them. _

_He also saw all his uncles and his aunt and his baby cousins, and a really old man with a white beard and a serious looking lady along with another couple with another old lady with a boy who looked like his age but much fatter in her lap._

_Harry's eyes opened wide because EVERYONE was staring at his family. And all the adults were smiling so big and than they were moving towards them and he felt people hugging his mum and him and saw them doing it to his dad too. He couldn't make out what everyone was saying but it was things like. _

"_So good you can finally come out of hiding now!"_

"_Look at how big your children are!"_

"_Don't you two just look amazing."_

_Harry started squirming because so many of the adults were all around them and some of the kids were staring at the two of them and he didn't like how they were squishing him and pinching his cheeks. He was starting to feel awful so he really wanted his padfoot._

_When his mom finally put him down Harry darted through the sea of legs to get free. When he was on the outskirts he saw his uncle who still had not noticed him because he was staring at his dad and laughing because they were being squished._

_Sirius who had not seen Harry coming screamed "BLOODY HELL!" as a little blur of black was launched into the air and attached him self to his neck and little legs attached to his waist. _

_Harry was laughing and in between giggles started saying "fuzzy time, fuzzy time." Did not notice that everyone froze at Sirius' outburst all the children were silent and all the adults were frowning at him for swearing at the children._

_Sirius did not notice their disapproving faces because he was staring wide eyed at Harry wondering how the hell the kid had jumped so high since he only came up to Sirius' knees._

_Lily was the first to unfreeze herself, "SIRIUS BLACK!" his head finally snapped up to see a bunch of faces staring at him. Harry had also stopped his chant upon hearing his mother yell. He hated it when she yelled. "Watch your language there are children here!" there was some nods and affirmation noises from the majority of the adults save the four marauders three of whom were chuckling at their friends expense. _

"_Well Sorry" Sirius replied sarcastically, "Maybe if your child didn't fly out of nowhere and attack me I could have censored my language." Sirius laughed but his wife just looked at him with a disapproving glance._

"_Hun you know better than to swear in front of the children and you cant pawn this off on Harry. Its obvious you picked him up. He is to small to get up there."_

_Harry who didn't really understand what Sirius did wrong started laughing, which caused his mum to look at him who was about to say something along the lines of how swearing was not funny, but never got the chance too._

"_He dinna pick me up auntie 'lexa, I JUMPED! My padfoot was looking at daddy and I wanted him to look at me so I jumped on him! It was fun!"_

_Before more people could say Harry could not jump that high, Remus burst out laughing "I believe our little pronglet is showing signs of magic."_

_A few people raised their eyebrows while some of the younger children giggled and James laughed full out saying "That's my boy, does the strangest things sometimes!"_

_When Harry finally stopped laughing he tugged on padfoots shoulder length hair. "Paddy! Can we have fuzzy time now?" Sirius who finally got over his shock laughed at his godson and promised him that he would do it later but he had to check on his kids Rosie and Orion._

_Sirius set Harry down who went over to moony and wormtail to give them hugs too. Everything around Harry became a blur talking with his other two uncles meeting all the adults and the kids with them, playing with Rosie and Orion and Ash. Everything however came into focus when she walked in._

"_Sorry were late!" Harry turned and saw a woman's set of legs and a mans set of legs and in between them was the prettiest thing he had ever seen. She had bubblegum pink hair that went to her shoulders and really bright sparkly blue eyes her skin looked like cream and she was wearing a plaid skirt with a neon green tank top. _

_Harry almost fainted when she smiled brightly at the room and waved yelling "wotcher!" and her hair turned the same color green as her tank top._

_Harry was frozen wide-eyed, she was even prettier than his mum and he never thought anyone could be prettier than his mum. Slowly he regained function of his body as the three new people started mingling around in the room._

_As soon as he could move again Harry went and found his dad. Pulling on his fathers robes he said, "DAD! I need to talk to you right now!" His father who was talking to the old man immediately looked at him. _

"_What do you need my lil pronglet?" Harry looked over at the old man who was smiling slightly at him big blue eyes twinkling, and uncle Sirius who was also staring at him._

"_Alone." He hissed. His dad looked over at his two companions shrugged his shoulders and said "kids." With a smile. _

_Harry followed his dad out of the room and into the hallway watching as his dad squatted down so they were eye level, "okay son what do you need?"_

_Harry looked at the door in the room were he could see his mom watching the two of them, when she caught him looking she smiled at him, he smiled back but only a lil because his mom could not hear what he had to say. "Dad I need you to put a privacy charm on." His dad cocked his head to the side while raising an eyebrow. Harry was anxious though he needed to talk to that pretty girl but he needed his dad to tell him how. "PLEASE daddy!"_

_James chuckling all the while put up a silencing spell._

"_Finally!" Harry said throwing up his little arms, "Dad." He looked at his father trying to put the most serious expression he could on his face, "who is that girl that just came in?"_

_James looked over at the girl who still had her hair neon green and smiled at his son "would you like me to introduce you?" Harry shook his head; he wanted to introduce himself to show her how mature he was. "Okay well do you only want to know her name than?" James said with only a slight frown. Harry nodded, "well her name is Nymphadora Tonks and the two adults she came in with are ted Tonks her father and andromeda Tonks who is her mother and also padfoots cousin."_

_Harry was upset at that if her mom was Sirius cousin and Sirius was his uncle than they were related. Now Harry did not usually cry, but knowing that he could never be with the pretty girl like his dad was with his mum made tears come to his eyes. He felt as his father leaned into hug him and he leaned into the comfort he felt from his dad._

"_What's wrong pronglet?" His dad asked as his fingers ran through Harry's hair. _

"_Were related." Saying it out loud made it so much worse for Harry who than began to sob harder, he could feel tears make marks on his cheeks, and he knew he was shaking pretty hard. Harry felt another set of arms wrap around him from behind and instinctively knew it was his mum. _

_He heard his dad start laughing, and his mum hiss "James stop it, tell me why he's upset right now!"_

"_S'okay Lil just give me a sec." he felt his mum lift him totally out of his fathers arms and into her lap as she rocked him and some of his sadness went away as she kissed the top of his head as she told him how much she loved him. "Harry." He heard his father say but now he was angry at him for laughing at his broken heart. "Harry you guys aren't related so you should not be upset." Hearing that Harry froze. He was not related to his Nymphadora. Slowly he felt himself smiling._

"_Really?" He asked his still watery eyes lighting up a bit. His father nodded as his mum squeezed him. "You promise?" His father smiled brightly and nodded. Harry felt his whole face break out into a lopsided smile. And he wriggled out of his mum's arms. _

_James laughed as he looked over at his son, "why did you want to know tyke? And why were you so upset?"_

_Harry did not want his mum to get upset that he thought someone was prettier than her so he looked over his shoulder at her and even though she was smiling at him he just shook his head and pressed his lips together, he could not hurt his mum like that._

_Lily sighed and stood up setting Harry down again and whispered in his ear. "I will go for now sweetheart just remember I love you and if you need me I am just around the corner." She kissed the top of his head and walked away. Harry turned back to his dad smiling brightly._

"_Dad you have to promise not to be mad at me." His dad smiled at him and nodded his head and made a cross over his heart. "I found someone who is prettier than mummy." James eyes widened already having an idea of whom his son was talking about. "I'm sorry," said Harry taking his fathers eye widening the wrong way. "I can't help it I fell in love with her as soon as she walked into the living room." James eyes widened even further but he smiled at his son. Harry hesitated and looked at his shoes, which he started drawing circles in the carpet with. "I need you to tell me how to make her love me too." When his dad did not immediately say something Harry slowly peeked at him threw his eyelashes._

_When he saw his father smiling brightly at him and shaking in laughter Harry frowned and pouted. He saw his dad stop laughing, "Well pronglet I knew you would be interested in girls but I didn't think it would start on your first trip out of the manor." His father said laughing slightly, Harry felt his eyebrows scrunch up on his forehead. "Sorry sorry. Okay son well if you want the girl to like you first you have to introduce yourself and talk to her." Harry nodded that made sense. "Now don't tease the woman I made that mistake with your mother for years, it doesn't woo them you can tease them later on" his dad said with a wink, "Also you have to tell them how you feel and be honest. Also you hope to Merlin it all works out." _

_Harry smiled that made sense, introduce yourself, no being mean, be honest, and hope. "THANKS DADDY!" Harry shouted giving his father a huge hug, but before his dad could say anything else he turned around and marched into the living room his head held high shoulders pushed back like how his dad walks sometimes. He made sure he had a big smile on his face and his glasses were not falling off. _

_He never noticed the attention he was gathering from some of the people in the room marching like that his eyes were only for the girl whose hair was again bubblegum pink. When he was close enough he tapped her on the shoulder._

_She turned around slowly and smiled brightly at him "wotcher!" Harry momentarily forgot what he was saying and faltered. He realized he must have just been staring into her now purple eyes for much to long when she started frowning at him. _

_Not liking seeing her sad he squared his shoulders again and took a deep breath, "HIIMHARRYPOTTERIALREADYKNOWYOURNYMPHADORAYOURTHEPRETTIESTGIRLIVEEVERSEENANDIWANTEDTOTELLYOUILOVEYOU." _

_After his loud proclamation people stopped their conversations to look at him, his lil sister and cousins and some of the redheads were laughing. Nymphadora the only one he cared about, eyebrows were furrowed though she smiled slightly, "sorry could you say that again slower Harry all I caught was your name."_

_Harry closed his eyes and said again a little quieter but still fairly loud voice. "Hi I'm Harry potter I already know your name Nymphadora you're the prettiest girl i've ever seen and I wanted to tell you I love you." Her eyes were wide as saucers by the time he finished and everyone else was quiet._

_Harry was getting upset when after two minutes she still had not said anything and he could hear the twins giggling and the red headed twins laughing with his sister. _

_Harry could feel his eyes watering as Nymphadora hair kept changing through colors but she still had not said anything. He was too ugly and stupid and immature for a pretty girl like her. He looked over at his mum tears in his eyes to see her scowling at someone behind him; he turned his head to see his dad wide eyed staring at him too. A tear fell down his cheek even his dad thought he was stupid. _

_Harry was going to run and bury himself in his mum but when he turned around and looked at her tears running down his cheeks and his lower lip quivering she smiled at him tears starting to form in her eyes cause she hated seeing one of her babies upset, she mouthed to him 'its okay I love you' with a watery smile._

_Harry smiled slightly his mum was the best person in the world; she made him feel braver and stronger. Harry thought for a minute whenever his dad was bad and made his mum sad or angry he always gave her lily-flowers and it always made her smile. _

_Looking straight into his mums' eyes he smiled his huge lopsided smile and tried to remember all the details of the lily-flower. Harry felt his fingers get really warm and tingly and when he looked down he saw the most perfectest lily-flower he had ever seen._

_Harry was so busy trying to decide whether to give it to his mum for making him feel better or the pretty girl because he loved her, to notice everyone gasping and his sister ash start clapping._

_Harry looked back at Nymphadora who was still pretty wide eyed but the colors were cycling slower and he reached out his hand with the flower to her. "I sorry for making you upset pretty, when my dad screws up he gives the lily-flower to my mom and it always makes her smile."_

_Nymphadora looked down at the flower in his hands and looked back up at him smiling and blushing a nice red and slowly started to open her mouth to say something, "WAKE UP!" Harry frowned that did not seem right; she was supposed to thank him. Before he could contemplate it any further he suddenly felt extremely cold._

Wait that was a dream I cant feel cold in a dream. Can I? As soon as the realization that I was awake really sunk I realized that it was only my head that was soaked and my body was shaking from the shock of the experience.

Slowly I sat up in my bed feeling the water drip from my hair and face and down my chest making tracks in my skin as it went under my pajama top. I knew Ash was the culprit, even though she had obviously fled the scene after soaking me with water.

When I found that mischievous little witch she was going to pay! That was my favorite dream she just interrupted. Every couple months I would relieve the day that I met Tonks. After I gave her the lily she would always smile open her mouth and tell me that I was too young for her but maybe one day we could work something out, than she leaned down and kissed me.

The kiss lasted no more than a second but it made my whole body sing and I remember floating a bit of the ground after, that shocked the hell out of my parents. Too bad Tonks never paid me much attention anymore.

Last year was her seventh and final year in Hogwarts, she was in Gryffindor like me, but she rarely stayed in the common room. When I was growing up and in my first year she always made sure to spend time with me and joke with me and sometimes we would even plan pranks to get the Weasley twins or other unfortunates in our school. However that all changed the summer before second year, she missed my birthday party, I remember andromeda saying that she had a date.

All I remember was being crushed, ever since I was four I knew my heart belonged to her, I felt so alive when I was with her, and I felt whole. Not that there was anything wrong with my life or I was really missing anything I just always felt better when she was with me.

I still think it was a terrible shame when I saw her on September first that year; she had completely changed her appearance using her metamorphagus abilities. I thought she was beautiful the way she was before with her heart shaped face, high cheekbones, big blue eyes and blond hair. Apparently though her boyfriend didn't think so, they lasted about two weeks into the school year. After him every month for the last two years she would be with another guy always changing her appearance.

I don't understand why she was doing it she was beautiful the way she was. I felt like such an idiot hoping and praying these last two years that she would notice me again, that I would be important to her again. That's why every time she broke up with one of her boyfriends and came back to the common room crying I would leave my friends and wrap my arms around her and let her cry. Every time I thought things could change between us but they never did.

I knew it was fools hope anyways she was gorgeous and four years older than me, but in January last year after her worst break up I went for a different way to get her attention.

I asked out Daphne Greengrass, I was going for the shock factor you know Gryffindor with a Slytherin. That action certainly did piss off Ron and Hermione, Fred and George thought it was hilarious, while my sister and Ginny would not stop calling me traitor for a month.

The school talked about us for the rest of the year until the end of term, it was a big shock teachers son and Gryffindor Harry Potter dating an evil Slytherin. It seemed though that the only person I really wanted to shock did not even care, I remember her coming up to me and congratulating me on my first girlfriend and simply telling me not to be a prat.

But not one hint or glimmer in her eye said she was jealous. After that I started paying more attention to Daphne, I mean she was very pretty and she was actually quite sweet, for a Slytherin. She had long brown hair and pretty hazel eyes, she was nice and slim and she had developed earlier than normal.

I was broken out of my reminiscing by a banshee, "HARRY! I dumped water on your head for a reason! Mom and Dad are finally going t o give us our birthday presents! COME ON!" Ash could be so ridiculously loud sometimes honestly. She was the best sister I could ever ask for but she did make me question our heritage sometimes, I mean did wizards ever mate with banshees and it was a dormant gene in our bloodline till she came along?

I couldn't help but chuckle at myself, "I'm getting dressed be there in a minute!" I finally got up; the hardest part of my morning was getting out of my king sized waterbed. I had no idea why my parents agreed to get it for me I just know it was the best thing in my life.

See my family had quite a bit of money due to my father's inheritance and both my parents continue to work, father as an auror and my mother as Hogwarts charms professor. Our parents never really spoiled us though, sure our house was pretty large, three stories, with six bedrooms, two studies, a potions lab, library, family room, dining room, and a kitchen. We did have a quidditch pitch too, but that was father's stipulation due to his love of the game and it really did help because I became the youngest seeker at Hogwarts in a century and Gryffindor hasn't lost a game in the three years I have been there.

But our parents always made sure to keep us humble, they only bought us the necessities, like clothes, and school stuff throughout the year and than they would usually either get us one big present on our birthdays and Christmas or they would get us a couple smaller things.

We did get an allowance of ten galleons a month, to do with whatever we wanted but our parents said that every year we had to donate at least a months allowance to a charity.

Usually me and Ash ended up giving more, because our parents were the type of people you wanted to impress. Sure they would love us no matter what but they were just such good people that they made me want t o be a better person.

Anyways somehow I had convinced them that for Christmas I deserved to have a king sized water bed with silk sheets, Dad and padfoot thought it was a great idea, and I remember the day after I got it the two of them sat me down and gave me the talk.

Mom had given me the talk when I was eleven but it was much more amusing with dad and Sirius telling me the ins and outs, though it was more on the awkward side when Sirius started giving me tips on how to please women.

Finally getting out of bed I looked around my room, this was my favorite room in the house, the entire south wall of my room was glass, and my bed was pushed up along the entire edge, and the window looked out over the quidditch pitch. My three walls were all painted in Gryffindor red, and one wall was covered in quidditch posters and pictures with my family and friends. My ceiling was enchanted to always show the night sky, because I loved staring at the stars. The east wall (the one covered in posters) was where my closet was, it was not a deep walk in but you could step inside and walk a few paces. The west wall is where I kept all my books and paraphernalia. The entire wall was covered in shelves, half was filled with books and the other half was filled with some of the things I had created myself, along with a bunch of random things from zonkos, some picture frames and random presents I had gotten over the years. The north wall had the door and my desk that was absolutely covered in parchment, quills and inkpots.

Quickly looking over at Hedwig's perch I noticed she was still gone, I guess she was waiting for Daphne to write me back before she came home. Quickly pulling on some black trousers, and a green cotton t-shirt, I quickly left my room. I could have gone to a mirror to see the state of my hair but I knew it was absolutely hopeless so there was no point whatsoever in fixing it.

As soon as I was in the hallway I started running, now that I was actually ready for the day I really wanted to know what my present was. My 14th birthday had been last Sunday, and since Ash's 13th birthday had been last Saturday our parents had decided to make both of us wait a week to get their presents.

IT had been so odd, everything had been routine on Saturday mom had made Ash's favorite food for breakfast, Ginny her best mate and my mates little sister had come over to spend the day with us.

Every year on our birthdays we get to pick one place we want to go, and Ash had decided she wanted to go to the zoo so our whole family (incl. Ginny) had dressed up as muggles and gone to the zoo, we met moony, wormtail, and padfoot and his family there. Padfoots family and wormtail and moony all looked ridiculous in their rendition of muggle clothes. Our family fit in perfectly because mom was a muggleborn and she knew how they dressed.

I mean honestly Sirius had worn a women's skirt! I think he may have done it more for laughs than anything else but it was still ridiculous. Our rather large group spent the day at the muggle zoo, which was rather entertaining, but the creatures were very lazy and did nothing interesting at all.

Now usually when we would all go back home mom would make an awesome dinner, and we would open presents. Everything was going according to plan, we had dinner, Ash opened presents, but my parents had not given her anything.

That was odd but nobody said anything. I noticed the whole time though that Sirius was laughing and his wife Alexa kept pinching his arm as if telling him to shut up. I mean it was very odd but you start expecting those things from Sirius after knowing him for 14 years.

On Sunday we had repeated the whole process again because it was my birthday, except Ron had come over, and I had decided I wanted to go to the muggle cinema, because I heard some muggleborns talking about it at school and mom explained to me how it worked.

I don't even remember what the name of the movie was called now, but I decided I wanted some swords now because the way they fought with them was fascinating! Muggles I decided could come up with some pretty okay things.

When it came time to open my presents I opened all the presents from the present company and than opened the presents that had come by owl from my other friends, but my parents had not gotten me anything either.

I noticed that on my birthday all four of the marauders were laughing and even Rosalie and Orion my 12-year-old honorary cousins were laughing!

When I asked about it everyone simply said I had to wait until Friday, which was today. Coming to the top of the stairs I slid down the large banister and into the entry hall, the rush I got from flying down the banister always made me giddy. Though I had to be careful to make sure mum never caught me, she always thought I would break something. In my opinion she worried too much.

Our entrance hall was very open dad had knocked out the walls between the entrance hall and the living room and what used to be the parlor to make one huge space that was all open around the stairs. The entire area was done in pastel green and blues, and the living room area had beige leather couches with a glass table

When I walked into the kitchen I was bombarding with the delicious smells of bacon and pancakes, I looked over to the stove where mum was cooking, she had made sure we had muggle kitchen appliances, because that's how she liked t o cook, though I did see her swishing her wand and directing things.

Dad was sitting at the island in the center of the kitchen on one of the stools; he was reading the prophet his hair in wild disarray much like my own with his glasses hanging on the tip of his nose. I noticed him move his emerald green eyes quickly above the paper to look in my direction, wink and than look over at mum.

A crooked goofy smile appeared on his face as he stared at mums back, his whole face softened, even the mischievous glint left his eye as he stared at her, I noticed her turn around and look at him with a huge smile.

My parents loved each other so much it was almost tangible, I hoped that one day I could find something like that they were so in tune with the other. Sometimes I thought they did not even need to speak to communicate.

Mum had not noticed me standing in the doorway yet, so I walked into the kitchen, as I got closer to her I noticed she was humming a weird sisters song. Personally I didn't much care for the band but Ash and mum sure seemed to love them. Maybe it was a girl thing.

"Morning mum." I said as I kissed her on the cheek, I couldn't help but laugh as she gasped and jumped slightly.

"Merlin, sweetheart you scared me!" mum was clutching the fabric over her heart as she closed her eyes to breath in deeply for a moment, I looked over to dad who was laughing and when he caught me looking gave me the thumbs up. "Even though you may not deserve it," mum said with a smile, "I already poured you a glass of pumpkin juice." I smiled brightly at that.

Looking over to the island I noticed a goblet of pumpkin juice in front of my usual seat. I quickly scanned the room to make sure Ash was not in the kitchen she liked to pull pranks early in the morning. Obvious evidence to attest to that was the fact that my hair was still wet and I could feel that my cotton shirt was damper than it should have been.

"Thanks mum you're the best smells good by the way." As soon as I finished my sentence I took a huge gulp of my juice and immediately spit it back out. Spraying the entire island and getting juice all over my father and the prophet he was 'reading' in the process.

My throat felt like it was on fire, I clutched at my throat gurgling frantically at the burning sensation. I jumped up from the stool and ran over to the sink and turned on the faucet sticking my head under the water and opening my mouth to let the cold water run down my throat.

After a moment of the water not making a difference I started to become aware of other sounds, such as my father laughing and Ash giggling like mad. I turned to see her standing behind her usual chair, clutching our father's invisibility cloak in her hand.

I could feel my fists clenching, I mean I was all for practical jokes, they gave meaning to life. However whatever the hell Ash put in my pumpkin juice had to be the most vile potions ever invented it felt like flames were going to come out of me, but there was no relief!

I needed to feel some type of release and the water had only made it worse, I knew Ash would be useless and dad was too busy laughing at the joke, so I turned to mum letting my desperation leak into my eyes, "Please." I croaked.

My mother frowned and waved her wand at my throat, "Ash what did you do to your brother?" At that statement both her and dad started laughing harder. I could tell my mother wanted answers, and she was certainly feisty when provoked. "James stop laughing, and you Aisling Lily Potter, you tell me what you did." I could almost hear Ash's grinding teeth as mother used her full name Ash, really disliked people calling her Aisling and mum only used it when she was really serious.

Dad put his large hand on Ash shoulder and she visibly relaxed. Now there were no favorites in our family, both Ash and me loved our parents equally and they loved both of us with everything they had. That did not change the fact that Ash and dad seemed to have a certain connection.

Both of them lived for pranks, I mean I did love jokes but I was also very focused on school, quidditch, and my friends. Jokes to me were more of something to do when I was bored or needed to amuse myself. Ash however lived for jokes. She got good grades and played on the team as a chaser but she put her jokes in front of everything else.

My sister was most definitely a daddy's girl, whereas I knew I was a momma's boy. Sometimes during the school year when I wanted to focus on my schoolwork I would go to her office and sit on one side of her desk and work as she marked papers.

I never had to talk to her for her to know how I was feeling, she could always tell when I needed her to talk and when I just wanted her to listen. Also she was the only person in my life who never made a negative comment about Daphne and me.

Honestly even though I went for the shock factor I did have feelings for Daphne, and it had hurt to know that most everyone in my life thought I was under a confundus charm or being subjected to a love potion to ever like a Slytherin.

I noticed that Ash was reaching into her pocket, and watched as she pulled out a bottle the size of a butter beer. However the liquid inside was a deep blood red. "It was the best idea I ever had, dad even said so." You could tell that Ash was getting excited again even thinking about her brilliant plan.

I had to cough to cover up my laughter as mum whipped her head around to stare at my father with an evil glint her eye. At least he had the sense to pretend to look ashamed though I could see still the smirk on his face. "May I ask James why this is the best idea your daughter has ever had?" Mum asked lifting one auburn eyebrow.

"O my daughter is she!" Dad said sounding exasperated though the twitching of his mouth ruined the effect, "well I guess we can refer too her as MY daughter when she is showing her marauder tendencies and when she does something wrong she can be YOUR daughter okay sweet cheeks?" By the time dad finished his tirade he was full out grinning and was about two paces away from mum.

Mum looked annoyed though you could see the love in her eyes, before she could say anything back dad had wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into his chest and they then proceeded to snog each other senseless.

I could not help but wrinkle my nose at that, as much as I loved them both I did not want to see them snogging in the kitchen, walking around them I noticed the pancakes had levitated themselves onto a plate. I grabbed two plates and put three pancakes and two strips of bacon on one plate, and put six pancakes and four bacon strips on another.

After I plated the food I proceeded to drench both plates in maple syrup, just the way Ash and me liked it. I walked back over to the island where Ash was rolling her eyes at our parents, though when she saw me coming with the plates she smiled brightly.

"Thank you brother dearest", Ash said as she grabbed the smaller plate from my hand, "I'm glad there are no hard feelings between us, but you needed to wake up and I thought you could use a kick start this morning. I mean you do know you're usually groggy for at least an hour after you wake up." She shoved some pancake in her mouth and sighed in content, before looking at me and roaming her eyes over me, "see look how awake you look."

I forcefully jabbed my large stack of pancakes at the comment, though I could not deny it. That red liquid sure did wake me the hell up if nothing else. "Your still a git." Ash pretended to look offended as I smiled innocently at her, "Also consider us at war, as of right now."

"Bloody wanker." I heard my sister mumble though when I looked at her, she was grinning madly at her breakfast as she cut it up. Looking at her I realized that was probably her plan all along.

I had been remiss about my pranking duty as a junior marauder so far this summer. I had just been so caught up visiting my friends, practicing quidditch, and working on my newest project.

See last year Dean leant me one of his muggle books, and the main character had created a bomb, and the whole concept of bombs had fascinated me. I figured if I could take the bomb technology and integrate it with magic I could have a way of using magic delayed magic, that would be good for pranks, and I could bring it home in the summer so I would not be caught using magic though I could have set spells already stored inside of them.

Like instead of wires inside find a way to store the spell inside the metal and have it timed to go off. Right now I was simply working in theory because I could not test anything until I was back at Hogwarts, but I just had a sense that this invention would be invaluable to me at some point.

Anyways, seeing my sister's reaction just proved that she wanted a war between us, so she could amuse herself. That thought made me smile, as annoying as her pranks could get at times Ash was awesome.

She was a real livewire always full of joy and energy. She never seemed sad, and as at times I tended to brood over assignments or Tonks or just some random assignment, she could always cheer me up.

Even though we squabbled at times over pranks and such, we never really fought. That served me as she meant more to me than anything else in the world, and I think my heart would splinter if anything ever happened to her. Also the fact that we never fought seriously was beneficial to my life, when my sister was pissed she was scarier than a Hungarian horntail. I remember last year Malfoy had slapped Daphne in the entrance hall for dating me. I was livid but before I could even react Ash was in his face cursing and hexing him, I laughed as I remembered how his head had grown twice its normal size and his feet were dancing out of his control and he laughed hysterically from the rictumsempra. I had been so shocked because I knew Ash did not care much for Daphne, when I had asked her about it later all she had said is by slapping Daph Malfoy was hurting me which was inexcusable.

"What's so funny?" My sister prodded as she grabbed my last piece of bacon off my plate and ate it before I could say anything.

"Remember when Malfoy hit Daphne last year?" Ash didn't say anything but I could tell she was confused with how I would think that was funny, "I was remembering the state you left him in and how it took him a whole week in the hospital before his head went back to normal size."

Hearing the rest of the statement I watched as Ash's hazel eyes sparkled as she began laughing, she grabbed onto my arm and squeezed as she leaned her head into my shoulder. Her laughter vibrated through my body from my side, and having her laugh made me laugh all over again.

Our parents finally broke apart at our laughter, "And I was so sure we looked hot when we were snogging and here my own two children are laughing at the spectacle we make lily dear." Trying to stop my laughter I looked over at my parents. Dad was standing behind mum with his arms wrapped around her waist head resting on her shoulder as he looked at us with a fond smile on his face.

"James." Mum hissed as she swatted his forearm, "do be quiet!"

Dad raised his eyebrows suggestively "you gonna make me darling?"

Mum blushed, as both Ash and me looked at each other and groaned. Just as they were leaning into each other again Ash seemed to realize why she had been so excited this morning.

"NO" She shouted startling our parents so they looked back at us a question in their eyes. "You guys said we were getting our birthday presents today."

Dad smiled brightly at that a mischievous glint coming into his eyes, turning to mum he said, "Lils I thought we decided our children are becoming spoiled and didn't deserve presents this year."

Mum looked from him over to the two of us shaking her head slightly as she smiled, "Dad quit being a wanker." I said with a smile.

"Fine ruin my fun, bloody brats both my children." Dad continued grumbling about how we sucked the fun out of life, I knew he was just trying to be dramatic so mum would kiss him again.

"CAMPING!" Ash screamed on a level much to high for human ears, again I thought of banshees; was it possible? I noticed right after I screamed the miniature tent dad had just pulled out of his pocket.

I grabbed the miniature and examined the magenta fabric, it looked like the flaps were gold, my family certainly were Gryffindors through and through. It was hard to tell how large the tent would be considering wizarding tents were never the size they appeared to be. I could not really understand why we were getting a tent for our birthdays so I decided to joke about it.

"Ash!" I stage whispered, "This is the best present ever know all we need is to pack our essentials so we have a home on the go for when we run away next week."

Ash giggled and swatted my arm playfully, I always felt warm when I made my sister laugh. "Harry" she whispered loudly back, "You ruined our element of surprise." She got out in between her giggles.

Her comment of course made me laugh, both mum and dad were laughing with us. It was mornings like these, pranks included that I realized how lucky my family was.

The Potters were a pretty big name in the wizarding world, not that that really mattered, but we were well off, and had a home full of love. Most pureblooded families didn't have the big names and money with love usually the latter was lacking.

We were especially lucky that Voldemort had been murdered. Our parents went into hiding right after I was born, though I am not entirely sure why they decided to hide, when dad was an auror and they could have helped in the fight. I didn't look down on them for that though, they helped immensely before that, plus I knew that they had a pretty serious reason for hiding.

I knew that when we went into hiding The Longbottoms had gone into hiding as well, but when some nameless man in the middle of a muggle street murdered Voldemort on October 31st the Longbottoms came out of hiding to celebrate. Frank and Alice were found by Death Eaters and tortured to insanity with the cruciatus curse. Leaving poor year old Neville to live with his grandmother.

Our family had decided to stay in hiding for another three years after his downfall. My parents seemed especially scared to reemerge to the rest of the world it was almost as if they expected Ash or I to get snatched away as soon as they resumed their lives.

Obviously things went smoothly for us when we started going out again ten years ago. I knew though how lucky we were that our family made it through the war unscathed. Many had lost loved ones due to Voldemorts tyranny. Our parents had sat both of us down right before I started Hogwarts and told us how horrible Voldemort had been.

Some may have seen this as ridiculous, as the danger was past but my parents for some reason seemed to think it was necessary and honestly I was glad they told me. It made me appreciate what we had so much more knowing that I could have lost my family to Lord Voldemort, all those years ago.

"And I've got it all worked out, in my head, here's how it's got to be." Ash's voice roused me from my inner monologue of how Voldemort could have ruined my family, " it'll be you and me up in the trees, and the forest will give us the answer." I couldn't help my mouth from twitching as Ash sang our song softly to me. "It'll be you and I up in the sky, it's a combination for disaster." I could feel the crooked grin I had inherited from my father plastered on my face.

Ash looked at me expectantly as she stopped singing to look at me, "We will make believe, in a world we rule together." Before I could sing any further, Ash put her arms around my waist and squeezed. I hugged her back.

I could see my mum and dad smiling at the two of us out of the corner of my eye. I had not even noticed that everyone stopped laughing as I had started to brood. This is exactly why I needed Ash, without her I would probably think too much and do something very stupid.

"Sorry." I smiled sheepishly as she pulled away from me "just thinking."

"Good for a second we thought you were just that opposed to camping." Everyone laughed at Dads comment.

Before Dad could say anything else, a tolling bell rang through the house, meaning someone had just flooed over.

Everyone looked at me knowing that Daphne was supposed to be coming over today, I looked over at the clock above the sink it was only ten, Daphne was not supposed to come over until noon. "Its not Daph, she's not coming over for a couple hours yet."

"HARRY!"

"ASH!" Two separate voices yelled, well we did not need to guess whom flooed over anymore. Evidently from the voices it was Ron and Ginny Weasley. Because they were our best mates and we all visited each other so often, we never notified the other before showing up anymore.

"In here guys!" My mom called out, just as two excited looking red heads entered the room. If I were still eating my food would have sprayed all over my family.

Ginny's red hair was thrown up in a messy ponytail, and you could tell it was tangled, the real kicker though was she was in a pink nightgown that went to just above her ankles with frills around her neckline and on the cuffs.

Ron was wearing his old chuddley canon pajamas that ended two inches above his ankles and his hair was even messier than mine. Ash and I were laughing so hard I almost missed their next statement. ALMOST being the keyword.

"Mate our parents just told us! Can you believe were going to the quidditch world cup on Sunday!" Ron shouted that immediately shut me up we were WHAT!

I whipped my head around to my parents who had amusing expressions, they both looked amused at the clothing our friends wore but also looked annoyed at what Ron had just said.

"We even get to sit in the Ministers box!" Ginny squealed throwing herself at Ash.

My brain however could not process this; we were going to the Quidditch world cup. This was practically a dream come true the world cup had not been held in Britain in my lifetime and seats in the Ministers box were the best seats you could possibly get.

It all clicked that's why we had the tent, people camped out at the world cup. O MERLIN! "WERE SERIOUSLY GOING TO THE CUP!" seems Ash clued in at the same time as I did as we both yelled together.

Ginny pulled away from Ash as I was looking between my parents and my friends. Suddenly Ron turned scarlet and slowly turned to my mother, "you hadn't told them yet had you?" his shoulders were slightly hunched as he looked at our parents sheepishly. "Bugger." He muttered as he saw their expressions.

Before he could apologize however my dad waved him off, "Its alright Ronald, we were just getting around to it. No reason to fret."

Ginny and Ron both still looked abashed but their smiles were returning. I felt my entire body quiver in excitement as I hurtled myself over the island to wrap my arms around my parents, "thank you thank you thank you thank you! You're the best parents in the whole world."

I could feel them shaking with laughter as Ash wrapped her arms around us too. After our family hug fest, Ron and I started talking excitedly over this turn of events. Apparently my dad had pulled some strings because the minister owed him from some case last year where him and Sirius saved his life.

So my family, Ron and Ginny, Sirius, Alexa, and the twins (Rosalie and Orion) were taking ten of the twelve seats in the box. Apparently Neville and Seamus who were two other soon to be fourth year Gryffindor boys that I sometimes hung out with were going too which was exciting. Honestly in my opinion this whole situation was exciting, my body was practically shaking in anticipation.

Only 48 hours and I would be at the stadium to witness the Ireland vs. Bulgaria game. I still had an hour and a half before Daphne came over, but to get rid of all this extra adrenaline racing through my veins I convinced Ron to come flying for a bit. It was exhilarating to be on a broom, I felt so free and at home in the air, and somewhere deep inside me I could almost feel a song wanting to break free from my chest every time I flew.

More time must have passed than either of us noticed because I heard my mum calling me and I looked down to see her standing next to a pretty girl with waist length brown hair, who was also currently smiling up at me and waving excitedly.

I tilted my broom down so I was completely vertical and plummeted to the ground. I heard Daphne and my mother scream as I hurtled towards the ground at breakneck speeds. I could feel the burn of the wind in my eyes and my hair whipped around my head.

Quickly jerking the broom handle when I was inches above the ground I brought my firebolt to a halt and smiled at the scared/livid expressions of my girlfriend and mother.

Daphne threw her arms around me and practically jumped on my broom with me making the broom quiver slightly at the shock of it. I smiled slightly at feeling her plant kisses all over the left side of my face that certainly was a way to get her to kiss me. I could not help but wish my mum were not here so I could kiss her properly.

"O I swear I will ring his neck for encouraging you to pull stupid stunts like that." I could tell mum was more scared than mad as she quickly scanned me again to make sure I was all right before she turned and practically ran towards the house.

I chuckled knowing my dad was totally in for it. Daph had stopped kissing me but she was still holding me in a death grip as Ron flew down towards us. "That was stellar mate!" he said as he clapped me on the back, "Hey Daphne." I was proud of Ron he called my girlfriend by her given name know instead of her last name, and he never even grimaced anymore.

Daphne however seemed oblivious to Ron as she continued squeezing me practically to death. Ron looked at me quizzically and I shrugged my shoulders. He continued to look at us for a couple of seconds before shrugging himself and mouthing 'I will floo call you later 'kay' I nodded as my best mate put the broom he borrowed back in our broom shed and walked into the manor.

I rubbed my hand over my girlfriends back, "Daph I'm fine, honestly. No big deal." I realized after I said that I had said something bad because she immediately stiffened.

"NO BIG DEAL!" she shrieked. "You could have been KILLED because you're being stupid! Do you even KNOW what that would do to ME!" I know I should have felt more ashamed of upsetting her but honestly I didn't think it was a big deal and honestly she was hurting my ears. Maybe all girls were somehow linked to banshees.

Thinking that I could not help but smile, which seemed to enrage Daphne even more. She looked at me as she paused to take a breath and her face instantly went red as she threw up her arms in exasperation. She than turned around and stormed into my house.

Hurriedly I put my broom in the shed and ran into the house. I saw my dad in the living area shaking his head at me and pointed towards the stairs. I nodded my thanks as I took the stairs two at a time.

As I passed Ash bedroom I could hear her giggling with Ginny about Merlin knows. Probably some stupid crush they had. I noticed my bedroom door was closed. I breathed in quickly before reaching for the handle. Maybe 14 wasn't old enough to deal with girls, I so did not understand how they functioned.

Daphne and I had been dating for 7 months now and she still made me want to rip my hair out. Opening the door I saw her sitting on the edge of my king sized bed staring at my nightstand and the two pictures I had in frames there.

I cautiously sat beside her. She turned and looked at me questions in her eyes. I knew exactly what she was wondering, she was wondering who the girl was in one of the pictures on my desk. One of the frames held a picture of a 4-year-old Harry potter grinning madly at an 8 year old Nymphadora who was holding onto a lily. The two kids in the picture kept grinning than turning away as one blushed and the others hair changed colors. It had been taken right after she had kissed him.

The second picture was of Harry and Daphne from earlier in the summer, the first time she had come to his house. Daphne was walking away from the Harry in the photo who would grab her around the waist and pull her back to him and wrap his arms around her and kiss her cheek. He remembered that he had wanted to take her up flying with him but she was afraid of heights and she had been upset that he had forgotten.

To avoid her asking any questions and making things awkward between us I quickly kissed her lightly and pulled black resting my forehead against her, "I am sorry you know." She smiled at me and I felt a pang of regret slice threw my stomach; I was not only apologizing for the 'incident'. I knew that even though I cared deeply for Daphne I could never love her, and I was so terribly sorry about that. That and the fact I knew that I would always love Nymphadora. I knew it was weird that I loved her from such a young age, but I just knew it in my heart that she was the only one for me.

"I forgive you Har." I had to hold in the wince even after three months of her newfound nickname for me it still grated me horribly. "It just scares me so much when you do things like that I don't know what I would do if I lost you." She stared deep into my eyes for a second, before smiling and leaning the lower half of her face closer to me and snogging me roughly.

I was shocked at first, Daph was always so gentle, she never really snogged with force, I realized after a couple seconds that I liked this snog better and started to kiss her back in earnest.

I tentavily brushed my tongue along her lower lip. We had only begun kissing with tongues since summer started so only a little over a month, and we only saw each other once or twice a week, so it was still pretty new. I'm still not sure what happened to Daphne. At school for six months she always kept firm boundaries of where we stood, brief snogs with only slightly heavier snogging occasionally.

However ever since she stayed at Pansy's house for the first week of summer, she had been pushing me for more. I mean its not like I didn't want to give it to her I mean I was a boy, but we were still fairly young so it was not that big of a deal.

Daphne disengaged herself before letting my tongue in her mouth so I figured this session was over but she shifted so she was in the middle of my bed and lying down.

She pulled her sweater over her head and was wearing a small tank; I could tell she wasn't wearing a bra because I could see her nipples through her shirt. Suddenly my throat felt too small for the saliva that I needed to swallow. I was incredibly embarrassed looking at her like this I could feel something tingle in my lower abdomen, as I grew hard. Shifting uncomfortably I stayed where I was.

Suddenly I felt a delicate hand grab my shirt and pull me over to her. I was stronger than her but I would give her what she wanted. Daphne pulled me down so I was on top of her and I braced myself on my arms as she tugged on my hair to bring my face to hers.

At first our kissing was relaxed, than suddenly Daphne seemed to get courage and shoved her tongue into my mouth, almost shoving it down my throat. I concealed my choking very well by a fake moan. Daphne was trailing her fingers all over my shoulders and back and before I knew it she was taking off my shirt.

I almost stopped her, this was new, but as soon as her fingers trailed along my skin I shuddered, this felt amazing. We continued snogging, awkward hands removing clothes awkwardly. I was in my boxers, my shaft straining against the cotton, as I looked down at my girlfriend still in her tank and pink knickers.

I looked at her not sure what she wanted me to do when she grabbed one of my hands and put it on her left breast. I groaned as I felt the soft mound in my hand.

Instinct seemed to take over as I caressed and kneaded her, after a couple of minutes I removed her shirt and stared in fascination at her breasts. I continued to massage both as she moaned and squirmed underneath me. I had a strange sense of male pride watching her.

She wanted me I could see it in her eyes, they were clouded in lust and I knew I wanted her, to at least touch me because I felt as if I would blow up. "Please Harry." She whispered, her speaking semi brought me out of my lust trance; I should stop this I did not love her I felt bad taking her virginity and giving her mine. Just as I was about to pull back she moved underneath me her heated core rubbing against my throbbing shaft and I groaned loudly.

Who was I to deny her what she so obviously wanted. Quickly taking off her knickers and my boxers. I stared at her sex in fascination before trailing my fingers along her folds. I wasn't sure what to do but I remembered Sirius telling me you had to prepare a girl.

After fingering her for a couple minutes she seemed ready, so I positioned myself over her, I let her know we didn't have to do this; she just smiled and nodded, so I thrust in. I almost came it was so hot, so tight, so bloody good.

I could tell it had hurt her, so I stayed still though it nearly killed me. As soon as she nodded at me her eyes still slightly watery I kissed her tear tracks and pumped. I could her hear gasping, but I stopped caring about whether she was enjoying herself, all I could feel was the pleasure. I quickened my pace, going as fast as I could.

I grunted as I came it was the best thing I had ever felt, it beat flying by far. It had been awkward as hell and we never even got a proper rhythm going and I knew I only lasted five minutes, but cumming felt entrancing. My whole body was humming in euphoria. I vaguely wondered why I didn't feel the need to burst into song like I did when I was flying. Because this feeling was just as amazing, but the thought was forgotten almost instantly.

I felt Daphne cuddle up against me as I shifted so I was lying beside her on my back. I thought I heard her murmur "I love you Har." I was also vaguely aware of whispering back, "I love you too." But I was too consumed in bliss to really notice.

AN: okay I know that chapter was really long and not to many interesting things happened but I assure you it was more than it seemed. First I had to set up how this Harry is different from canon Harry. Because this Harry has a loving family though I have tried to keep him as close to canon as possible to my story. ALSO I know it SEEMED as though a lot of the things were pointless, but most everything that was mentioned even in vague passing has some significance to later chapters. Well thanks for reading. REVIEW PLZ!


	2. Start Spinning

AN: Sorry I totally forgot the disclaimer on he first chapter.

DISCLAIMER- I do not own Harry potter it all belongs to JK Rowling and her various publishers and Warner Bros. I have no mal intent, and am not making money from this. Also the song I mentioned last chapter is not mine its trees- by Lovehammers. No harm intended. Also the song I use in this chapter is Wonder wall- by Oasis

I felt over heated, something was wrong I could feel it in my soul. I had been tossing and turning since I had tried to go to sleep at nine. We were supposed to be leaving at dawn for the Quidditch World Cup, so I had tried to go to sleep earlier than normal. At first I thought I was restless because I was so excited, but the feeling inside of me was one of sorrow, and almost self-loathing.

This was extremely odd because I new for a fact they weren't my feelings. Every minute that passed I was getting more and more frustrated; giving up I threw off my blankets. I snapped my calloused fingers to turn on the lights in my room. Reflexively I looked towards Hedwig's perch. Bloody hell I wanted to hit myself, if I had waited until the morning like I was going too to send Daphne her reply I would have had some company.

Daphne had been weird since Friday. After the shudders of euphoria had subsided I felt horrible. I had told Daphne that I loved her and I knew I had only said that because I was still on a high from my orgasm. Obviously I loved the feeling and loved that she had given that to me, so when she professed her love I had replied in kind.

If that wasn't bad enough I could tell that even though Daphne was happy that I had said I loved her that the shag had been a far cry from brilliant. After several minutes of silence Daphne had started stroking my abs, and I knew exactly what she wanted. Her muscles were still tense waiting for release so like a good samaritan I gave it to her.

It was brilliant exploring her body, and this time I paid attention to her and what she wanted and I made her cum with just my fingers twice before I entered her again. It gave me a sort of male pride watching the girl I was with shudder beneath me. I was even more elated due to the fact that I lasted much longer than the first time, and Daphne seemed much happier than before.

The downfall to that was her telling me I was perfect and that she just knew we would spend eternity together. I remember feeling like someone was choking me when she started talking about forever. She was serious, and I wasn't sure how I was supposed to respond. I cared for her a great deal but I would never love her.

I was so shocked that after coughing all I could do was smile. I mean what the hell was I supposed to tell her?

When she had gone home several hours later she had sent me an owl, just to tell me again that she loved me. Than yesterday she had floo called me so we could talk about our feelings. Two hours later after I finally convinced her I had to go she had owled me to tell me she already missed me.

She was acting so strange and I did not know how to deal with her anymore. She was acting as though a marriage contract was already signed between us for merlin's sake. Felling a headache coming on I placed the tips of my fingers to my temples and rubbed gently in circles. My reminiscing had distracted me from the odd feelings inside of me momentarily, but all of that was broken when I heard the taping at my window.

Placing my hand onto the glass a square piece of the glass shimmered than momentarily disappeared so that the black and gray owl could enter. My heart started beating faster as soon as I realized whom this owl belonged too. "Nymphadora." I felt my lips move almost caressing the name as if it were sacred.

She hadn't sent me mail since the summer before first year. I reached for the letter as Thor, her owl, held out his leg. It took longer than normal for me to detach the letter from his leg due to the fact that my hands were shaking so hard. As soon as the letter was detached Thor took flight out the window.

I dropped the letter twice before I calmed myself enough to be able to read it.

_Wotcher Green eyes, _

I felt my trademark crooked smile split across my face, she used to always call me that. Telling me how I would break hearts when I was older because my eyes were so devastating. I remember she used to try to morph her eyes to the same color as my mums and mine but she could never get the color exactly the right shade.

_I know it'll probably be two or three in the morning when you get this, so sorry if this woke you up. I don't know whom else I can talk too. I know it's a lot to ask but you always make me feel better. I would apparate but I don't have my license yet, and I don't know your floo address anymore. So could you maybe floo over here? Just for twenty minutes I promise. Its just you were always the one who made me feel better the last two years at school, and you're the only one I can even think about wanting right now. If you cant or don't want to I understand, just send a message back with Hedwig or something saying you can't. Ugh i am babbling and making a fool out of myself. If you want to come the floo address is 'The Den'._

_Tonks xox_

I was the only one she wanted, that thought made me feel incredibly warm inside. Gripping the letter like it was a lifeline I inhaled deeply, I could faintly smell her vanilla perfume; the smell engulfed me trapping me in a haze of bliss. I hadn't been close enough to smell her since January when she had talked to me about Daphne.

My bliss quickly evaporated though when I thought of January. Scanning the letter again I realized exactly why she wanted me, she had broken up with someone. I didn't even know she had a new boyfriend. She had turned down all offers since January, so she must have met this guy after she graduated.

My heart shattered and mended at the same time. She was still going from guy to guy which broke my heart, I still held hope one day she would love me back, but I felt better as this relationship hadn't lasted either.

Grabbing some gray sweatpants and quickly tugging them on, I placed the letter on my nightstand before silently creeping out of my room. I felt adrenaline pump through my veins as I crept silently through the house. If my parents caught me they would be really pissed. We were allowed a lot of freedom and generally our parents were really laid back, but they really did not like us not telling them where we were headed if we were going to leave.

Briefly I thought of maybe telling them, the second it crossed my mind I brushed it aside. They would NEVER let me leave at this odd hour in the morning especially because I should be resting right now before we go to the World Cup.

I knew I wouldn't be in too much trouble but my parents would be disappointed with my behavior. Which honestly to me was way worse than being punished, knowing that I let them down.

When I was finally standing in front of our fireplace I hesitated looking at the mantle. Various pictures of our family decorated the top, seeing my parents smiling faces reminded me of how upset they would be. I briefly thought of just sending the family owl to Nym telling her I couldn't come.

The foreign feeling of self-hatred and sorrow made my hands reflexively grab the floo powder. Somehow I knew those feelings were from Nymphadora. I had no idea how I knew that but I felt deep in my soul that she needed me.

Having made my decision I threw the floo powder into the grate stepped in after and called 'The Den'. The dizzying sensation overwhelmed me as I flashed by dozens of fireplaces catching brief glimpses of the rooms they were attached too.

Suddenly I felt myself being ejected from the floo system. I stumbled exiting the grate and almost fell but caught myself by grabbing onto the back of a nearby chair. I had never been to the Tonks house before so after righting myself I looked around the room. It was very homey. There were large blue armchairs spread around the room with an oak table in the center of the room. It was hard to tell the colors of the walls or anything else further in the room because the only light was from the fireplace, and the flickering orange flames only illuminated the area closest to the grate.

The rest of the room was in shadows so it took several seconds before I picked out the slightly shaking figure on the loveseat. I felt a sharp pain in my chest looking at her. Her hair was a dull mousey brown and looked like it had no life to it. It hung limply around her face; even though her eyes were closed I knew they would be a dull black.

For some reason whenever she was really upset like this she always looked like one of the 'ugliest' girls on the planet. She would distort her features to look horrible. I never asked why she did it; I knew she would try to deny it. But as I was the one she came to for comfort I was the one who saw her change. She would make her hair the mousy brown and make it look dull. Her eyes would go dull black and lose all their playfulness and love of life. She would distort her face making her cheekbones too prominent her lips to small and her nose look like it was broken several times.

I always had a feeling she did this because she felt ugly, but even with her face looking distorted she was still gorgeous to me. No matter what form she took I always knew who she was. Even now with her looking like a broken doll, I felt my entire body hum at her presence. I was somewhat shocked at the fact that she still hadn't realized someone else was in the room I mean I had been staring at her for a while.

"You know you'll never make a good auror if you cant even tell when someone's in the room with you." The reaction was slow, that scared me more than anything. Her eyes slowly opened and she turned her head in my direction. I could see that her eyes were full of tears and the tracks running down her face were prominent in the flickering light.

"You came." She whispered, my ears rang, even her voice sounded hollow. I could tell this was by far the worst break up yet. Usually she would have at least cracked a smile upon seeing me there. She didn't even acknowledge my auror comment, which was odd because I knew that was the one thing she was truly passionate about.

The need to see her smile and to have the glint return to her eyes wiped away any awkwardness I felt at talking to her again after so long. In three quick strides I was at the side of the couch, kneeling so my face was slightly lower than hers as I reached for her hand. Squeezing gently as my hand swallowed hers, "What's happened love?"

Instead of answering she burst into sobs again, thinking quickly I dragged her off the couch and into my lap. I wrapped my bare arms around her and held her to my chest, she was slightly bigger than I was still being that she was an adult and I was only fourteen but there wasn't so much of a difference that it was uncomfortable.

Her entire body was shaking which caused me to shake in return; it broke me seeing her like this. I knew I had to wait for her to calm down before she told me anything so I simply rocked our bodies back and forth slightly.

After a couple of minutes I couldn't help but start humming one of my favorite songs. My head was resting on her shoulder as I hummed with my eyes closed. After awhile all I could think about was the fact that i was holding Nymphadora someone who meant as much to me as my family. The smell of vanilla surrounded me and trapped all of my senses. My entire body felt warm and before I realized what I was doing my humming slowly turned into actually singing.

". And all the roads we have to walk a winding, and all the lights that lead us there a blinding, there are many things that I would like to say to you but I don't know how. Because maybe you're going to be the one to save me and after all you're my wonder wall."

My song-induced haze was broken when I felt Nym shudder violently. I opened my eyes to see blue eyes staring intently at my face. I felt a grin spread across my face she was obviously feeling better if her eyes were blue. I squeezed her gently, "You cold or something?" I lifted my head slightly and unwound my arms from her waist as I ran them up and down her arms quickly trying to warm her up.

"I didn't know you sang." I felt my face heat; I never sang in front of anyone, I didn't even really realize that I was singing to calm her down until she said it. I saw her smile and some of her playfulness returned to her eyes, "Don't be embarrassed, you're really quite good." Warmth spread through whether from pleasure or embarrassment I wasn't sure, but I hated that she called me on it so I averted my gaze to the floor. "I can't wait to hear how you sound when your voice drops."

I jerked my eyes back to hers making sure to put the most affronted look I could on my face, "I will have you know my voice dropped before last summer you git." I watched as she laughed slightly as her hair regained its natural shine, even though the color stayed brown.

She reached her arm around to punch me lightly, "Maybe so but it will probably change more before you're an adult." I knew she didn't mean anything by it but it really bothered me when she brought up age, and she always had to bring it up. I mean I knew she was older than me but honestly was it such a big deal? She didn't even realize she hurt me with those comments but she was always so fixated on my age that I knew she would never see me as anything other than a boy.

"I guess," I mumbled back to her. I probably would have been more upset if I knew she wasn't so sad. Priority one was cheering her up. Quickly smiling I looked back into her eyes, "speaking of adult why have you not gotten your apparation license yet. You've been legal since last November!"

I watched her intently as her hair flushed a light pink before going back to the brown. "I'm afraid to fail it." If I hadn't been so intent on her I would have missed what she said as she whispered it so quietly.

Normally I would have laughed if she said something like that, but I knew after break ups she was always really sensitive and self-conscious. "Tonks." I said as gently as possible, "you took the classes with everyone else, and I know for a fact you were one of the best in your class because Charlie Weasley told me when I asked how the classes were going. I also know that when you put your mind to something few things can beat you."

She seemed to think about what I said for a few minutes before her hair turned its lustrous blond with slight waves in it. She turned in my lap so she was sideways with the bottom half of her legs hanging over the side of my lap. She threw her arms around my neck and squeezed me closer to her.

I stroked her hair gently from scalp to in between her shoulder blades were the locks ended. I knew I was reveling in the silkiness of it a little too much, but I couldn't stop. She rubbed her face against the crook between my neck and shoulder and I felt her lips drag across the skin there. Even though I knew it was nothing remotely sexual about the action on her part I still felt the familiar pooling in my lower abdomen.

Avoiding a potentially disastrous moment I decided to ask her why she needed me, "So Tonks what happened?" I felt her tense slightly in my arms but I just continued to stroke her hair knowing she would talk to me when she was ready.

Several minutes later heard her voice softer than usual, "Well you know how I was accepted into the auror academy?" I nodded knowing she would feel the movement, "Well we had an orientation of sorts at the beginning of July. They told us all the books we needed to get for first year, and went over an overview sort of. Well after they finished talking they had drinks and stuff so we could mingle for a bit if we wanted. Well that's where I met Edward, he seemed like such a gentleman, and he was so handsome. He was home schooled so that's why I had never seen him before. Well you know that my last boyfriend was Evan that 7th year Ravenclaw in January right." I hummed my affirmative in answer when she stopped speaking

"Well I didn't really want a boyfriend after Evan having gone through like 17 over two years, so when Edward asked if I wanted to go to dinner I obviously said no." Even though I knew she eventually did go out with this guy I felt slightly elated at her saying no. "Well he told me he just wanted to be friends and after agreeing to that we exchanged owls for about two weeks. He was so amazing Harry, such a gentleman, from his letters I really thought that he was different from those other idiots I went out with. So when he asked me out a second time I said yes."

"Well I've seen him pretty much everyday the last month." Her breath hitched and I knew this was where things got bad. "Well tonight after we went out for dinner we went back to his place and things started getting pretty intense." I felt the tears sliding down my chest as she started to cry again.

"Did he ask you to change for him?" I had to whisper the sentence to her, so I could disguise the anger in my voice. I couldn't understand all the guys in the world Nymphadora was absolutely stunning and perfect as she was in her natural state but they always asked her to change. She used to do it for them too, but would always break up with them because she felt uncomfortable because they would start asking for random adjustments. I knew that after Evan she vowed to never change for anyone again, she would only change what she wanted too when she wanted to for herself or for work, but never for another guy.

I felt her tears dropping to my chest faster and sliding down my skin quicker. "Yes." She whispered back.

"Were you simply being yourself?" I knew asking the question was slightly odd, but I just felt like I needed to know.

"Yes." I clenched my fists in her hair, first of all how could someone be so insensitive to ask someone to change in the first place. Secondly she wasn't even using an alternate form she was actually being her self, she was gorgeous like that, how could anything even be more perfect?

Suddenly she was holding me in a death grip, "No one will ever accept me Harry, No one will ever love me, and I'm going to be alone forever." She sobbed, seeing her hair start loosing it color again something inside of me snapped.

"That's not true!" I said slightly too loud, lowering my voice I said fervently, "Tonks, you are absolutely breathtakingly gorgeous, any man who doesn't see that is a blind fool. Not only are you extremely attractive you are one of the most amazing people I know and extremely funny." I pulled her face away from my chest so she could look directly into my eyes and see the truth of my words. "There is someone out there for you, maybe your just not looking in the right place, but you will find him."

I stared at her intently for a few moments, the air felt charged, I felt an indescribably strong pull to her, I wanted to kiss her so badly. I leaned forward slightly, now was the perfect time to tell her how I felt. I wasn't sure why I thought it was perfect it just felt right. "Nymphadora I-"

She cut me off by punching me in the chest making the air whoosh out of me, "Don't call me Nymphadora Harry I hate my name you know that." I did know that, but I loved her name, I wish I could call her it all the time, I hated calling her Tonks.

Before I could really regain my breath she suddenly looked at me with an ashamed expression on her face. "Why did you come here tonight Harry." I really didn't know how to answer that. I knew it was because I loved her but the charged moment between us had passed, and to say that now would simply be awkward.

IT was silent for a while before I finally looked her in the eye, "Because I care about you." There that was fairly neutral. She could take it anyway she wanted, whether as simply a friend or meaning I felt more for her than that. I was still looking her in the eyes so I noticed as soon as her eyes started to fill with tears. Obviously she did not like my answer. Hesitantly I wrapped my arms around her again. Rubbing my hands slowly up and down her back. "Sorry love if I made you upset I didn't mean too." That seemed to only make her cry harder.

"Bloody hell I'm bad at this." I muttered mostly to myself but she obviously heard it for she pulled away still crying.

"BAD AT THIS! Harry the problem is you're so good at this! " I cocked my head to the side slightly in confusion as my hands fell from her upper back to her waist. "I mean you came tonight even though we've barely talked since you started dating Daphne, and I know I have been an awful friend to you these last two years. I'M SORRY!" she wailed the last part as she threw herself against me.

Loosing my balance partly from shock and partly from her momentum I fell to the ground so I was lying on my back and her body was laying half on top of me and half on the floor. I couldn't help it I started laughing. Most of it was because I was happy, she realized that things had changed between us the last two years and maybe things would be different now. Something about my laughter seemed to cause her to laugh as well, why exactly I wasn't sure but I know my smile widened hearing her giggles.

I looked up at her face to see her smiling at me, slowly as we stared at each other I saw her face finally change back to her true form. With her heart shaped face and high cheekbones. The only thing ruining my angels face was the tear tracks so I reached my hand up to slowly wipe the tears from her face.

I felt her sigh as she leaned into my palm, making my heartbeat faster. I let my thumb run across her cheekbone as I caressed her satin smooth skin, the gray tinge had faded to leave the cream colored skin I adored so much.

"Nymph." I breathed, I couldn't stop myself she looked so lovely and I loved her so much I felt like bursting. My voice seemed to break her out of whatever state she was in for she jumped up faster than I thought she could move, as her hair went slightly red before going back to blonde.

"Don't cal me that." She mumbled, it seemed somewhat half hearted which would have made me smile, if I didn't realize she had reacted so violently because she had realized it was ME and not one of her handsome boyfriends touching her. An awkward silence settled over us before she suddenly smiled brightly. "Well are you going to get up or what lazy bones." She laughed.

Even though I was upset the moment was tarnished I was happy to see her bubbly again, fun-loving Tonks was so much better than depressed Tonks. Sadness really didn't suit her. I slowly stood up fixing my sweatpants before I looked at Nym. "Quiet you."

"Harry." Nym said suddenly serious again. Instead of answering her I simply raised an eyebrow because I know it bugged her. "I really am sorry."

I shrugged, of course everything she had done had really hurt me, but I know she didn't mean it and she already apologized once. I wasn't really one for awkward apologies. "Its alright."

"Its really not though." She started twisting her fingers in the hem of her nightshirt. "You've always been there for me and I became a bitch ever since I really got into boys. I mean I have missed three of your birthdays now, because I was with some bloke. I promise from now on things will be different." I wanted to tell her not to make promises she couldn't keep but I didn't have the heart too. I wanted things to be different so bad it hurt. "I swear I wont date or be with another guy until i am old enough to pick the good sort from the bad sort."

I felt the laughter rising, and did nothing to stop it as it erupted from me. "Why would you say that, you'll for sure die a spinster now!" I was glad to joke again, I felt happier than I had been in a long time, there wasn't even really a reason just being with Nymphadora made me ecstatic, especially now that she was smiling, and starting to giggle along with me.

"I'm serious green eyes!" I could tell she was serious even though she was trying to look like it was a joke. Her hands were on her hips and she was mock glaring at me. I felt my laughter die as I looked at her beauty framed by the pink hues of the dawn breaking through the window.

"DAWN!" I yelled, probably loud enough to wake her parents, "Bloody hell! Tonks I got to go were supposed to leave at dawn today for the World Cup."

I didn't see the look on her face because I turned and ran to the fireplace, but I did hear her shout, "I'll owl you!" as I yelled Griffins Nest into the fireplace throwing down the floo powder.

Flashing past all the residences in reverse gave me time to panic slightly; if I were caught my parents would be upset especially if I made us late. Before I could get too carried away with my thought induced panic I was thrust from the floo system for the second time in as many hours into my living room. Landing on my hands and knees I barely felt the pain, as I pushed off the ground and ran as fast as my feet could carry me up the stairs.

Upon reaching my room I slammed my door thanking Merlin I was home free. Catching my breath I quickly grabbed a jumper and trousers from my closet, it only took me a minute to change and grab the bag I had packed last night with spare clothes in case the cup lasted a few days.

Before leaving my room I went to one of my shelves and grabbed my snitch for entertainment purposes, quickly shoving it in my pocket before it could take off. Now that my thoughts of being caught were stored away as a close call and I was paying more attention to my surroundings I could hear all the noise coming from the kitchen.

Dropping the sack at the bottom of the stairs I walked to the kitchen with a smile on my face. It sounded like there were a few conversations going on at the moment the loudest of course was Sirius. "Where in the hell is Harry? I woke up at this ungodly hour to get to your house and your kid isn't even awake yet! What do you have to say for yourself James?"

"Shut up!" I heard dad yell back with a laugh, "He's-"

"Right here." I interrupted my dad, everyone in the room turned to look at me. "Harry!" Squealed Rosalie as she jumped off the stool she was sitting on to run and give me a hug. Her hazel eyes looked tired but were still sparkling with excitement. Her dirty blond hair was in a high ponytail that bounced along with her body as she rocked in excitement. "I am SO glad you're finally here, now we can leave! I hate using a portkey but your friend Ron told me he would hold my hand when we went and he is really cute!"

I laughed looking away from Rosalie's excited face towards Ron who was leaning against the counter eating an apple, he almost choked when he heard what Rose said which just made me laugh harder as his face went the same color red as his hair.

"Harry why is their ash in your hair and on your face?" I felt the flames in my cheeks signaling that I was blushing, rather hard if the heat was any indication.

"Ugh." Was my brilliant response to Rosalie's next question. I looked around the kitchen but realized that everyone else had noticed my predicament and wanted an answer too. I really wanted to kick myself I should have looked in the bloody mirror before strolling downstairs without a care in the world. "I fell."

"Yeah into a fire." Ron muttered but since every one else in the kitchen was waiting for my answer they heard. I shot my supposed best mate a dark look, before shrugging my shoulders, trying to be nonchalant about the whole thing.

My mum and dad were frowning at me, Rosalie was looking expectantly at me, Ash was grinning, Ron looked oblivious, Ginny was laughing, Alexa looked confused, Orion was nowhere to be seen and Sirius was smiling broadly.

Sirius started laughing and his shoulder length wavy black hair shook as his hazel eyes shone with mirth. "Prongslet were you making a firecall to your girlfriend telling her how much you were going to miss her." Sirius started laughing again as Orion piped up.

He walked in from the other side of the kitchen over by where the bathroom was on this floor. It looked like he had recently got his black hair cut because it was much shorter than the last time I saw him. I watched uncomfortably as his gray eyes took on the trademark Marauder glint, "His girlfriend is hot, I'd firecall her too if she belonged to me." Orion smiled like he was a genius, "Hey Harry."

I smiled half-heartedly at him as I waited to see if everyone else would just take Sirius comment as fact. Moment's later dad smiled, "Good to see you using your lady charms properly. You junior Marauders have to keep the dream alive."

Mum gave me one last piercing glance, telling me she didn't buy it but would let it go before she elbowed dad in the ribs, "Do not encourage my son in your womanizing ways!" She said it with a glare but the twitching of her lips gave away signs of her mirth.

Shortly after that dad announced the portkey would leave in five minutes so we all headed out to the front yard, me grabbing my bag on the way as dad had already packed the tent with the rest of our stuff in it.

Reaching out to grab the portkey I started to feel the excitement bubbling inside of me again, knowing that we were going to the World Cup. Bulgaria vs. Ireland seemed like a very promising match too making the experience seem that much better. I looked over at Ron who was standing beside me with a crooked grin firmly on my face. Catching my glance Ron turned to look at me, his freckled face mirroring mine; full of excitement.

As I felt the familiar tug behind my navel, I left all my concerns at the manor fully prepared to have the time of my life at the Cup.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

My entire being was thrumming with adrenaline and fear. This was not how the night was supposed to happen! Everything had started out so wonderfully; we had arrived at the site and checked in quickly finding our campsite and setting up our tent.

The maroon tent with gold flaps was rather large inside. There was a common room type area with maroon walls and cream-colored armchairs scattered around with golden pillows. There was a kitchenette type set up with an island with stools on one end of the room with five doors leading off the main area.

One of the doors led to a bathroom with a toilet in a sealed off section and a shower with a claw-footed bathtub. Two of the other doors let to rooms with a king sized bed inside and the other two had two bunk beds set up in each room. The bunk beds were very similar to the Gryffindor dorm rooms except there was one on top of the other.

Orion, Ron and I were sharing one of those rooms and Rosalie, Ginny and Ash shared the other. After getting settled the six of us kids went to explore the camping area and to look at some of the vendors. We ended up running into random people we knew from school, so when we saw them we stopped to chat before going off to the vendors.

I bought Some Omnioculars for 10 galleons, seeing Ron eyeing them I secretly bought him a pair too. I would tell him it was his Christmas present or something. Ron bought a miniature figure of Krum and Ginny and Ash bought Ireland hats that yelled 'Go Ireland!' randomly. Rosalie and Orion bought Bulgaria scarves and Two Shamrock hats. They did look very odd but the looks they were getting from others were hilarious. People weren't sure whether to glare or smile because they were supporting BOTH teams. My cousins definitely had more Sirius in them than Alexa.

Alexa was very funny when she wanted to be otherwise she was fairly reserved and quiet. She tended to watch with a smile as Sirius went on with his usual antics and their children mimicked him; however, she always stepped in when they got out of hand and was the only one who could really keep Sirius in line. She was also very pretty with a very aristocratic face and rounded chin. Her dirty blond hair was cut so it flowed down to the small of her back though she usually had it up in a twist of some sort, and her gray eyes seemed to always sparkle.

The twins though definitely tried to emulate their father for being little balls of mayhem. Every time strangers would give them odd looks one would shout 'Bulgaria!' while the other shouted 'Ireland!' than they would look at each other and yell the opposite one. It was funny the first few times but by the time we got back to the site I was trying not to strangle them.

By the time the match started I was practically bouncing, the ministers box was the best seat in the house and even though the 11th and 12th seat were taken by Lucius and Draco Malfoy it was still one of the most amazing experiences I have ever had. The Omnioculars were probably the best investment I had ever made they were genius!

The match was intense, but exhilarating, if I wasn't so focused on being accepted into the unspeakables (even though I had no idea what they actually did), I would have totally tried to go pro. The excitement in the stands made me seriously wish I had a broom to fly! Hogwarts matches certainly had nothing on this; I could barely imagine how the players felt with the energy in the stands practically tangible.

Unfortunately the match only lasted a couple hours with Ireland winning but Viktor Krum from Bulgaria catching the Snitch. Krum was daft he should have waited for his team to score more goals so they could have won.

After the excitement of the match my mum made us all hot chocolate and we roasted some marsh mellows over the stove before settling into our beds to go to sleep. Ron and I talked for a bit with Orion making random comments about the match, but just as we started drifting off the screams started.

High pitched screams of terror echoed around the site and it seemed that every second the screams kept getting louder and that there were more of them. Dad had burst into our room telling us to stay in the tent, so of course us boys being idiots we got out of our rooms to look outside. The three girls were already in the main room and they told us that the adults had just left.

Ron went to look outside and muttered 'Bloody hell.' Which caused Orion to run and look too. Orion totally freaked and ran out of the tent looking for his dad before anyone could react. That set off the chain reaction of Rosalie running after her brother and the four of us that remained to go out to get the two 12 year olds that could be hurt.

Exiting the tent I had paused; all the tents further down were up in flames and a large group of people in black robes and silver masks were levitating three muggles and sending hexes at them while laughing. Wizards were running in every direction and when I looked to ask Ron if he knew what was going on I realized that I was now alone in front of our tent.

I could not just let my family and friends get hurt so I ran off in the direction that I figured they would go, away from the group of black robed wizards, and towards the tree line were there were less wizards running about. I thought I had seen a flash of red, which had cemented my plan.

That was how I ended up traipsing through a pitch-black forest with no sign of anybody else good or bad. The screams had long ago faded into barely audible murmurs in the distance. It had been at least half an hour since I came into this bloody forest. I reached into my back pocket to get my wand only to simply grab an empty pocket. 'Shit!' was the only word I could think.

Not only was I now lost in the middle of this forest with no idea where any one was I also had nothing to defend myself with. It was official I was a first class idiot, what kind of fool hears screaming and leaves his tent without his bloody wand.

The fear thrumming through my core was quickly turning into full-blown panic what the hell was I supposed to do? Okay standing and walking is not working maybe if I stayed in one spot someone would find me. Sitting down on the wet forest floor was far from comfortable. After several seconds I could feel the wetness seep into my pajama pants.

The needles, dirt and moss felt gritty against the cotton of my pants, the darkness was almost suffocating. With my arm fully extended and fingers flexing I still couldn't see my hand. A shiver ran down my spine as I realized that anything could be fairly close too me and I wouldn't be able to see them. The entire feel of the air around me was ominous and foreboding.

I could feel my breaths starting to come in pants, the panic was bubbling in my chest trying vainly to break from me in a scream. Clamping my teeth onto my lower lip to prevent any noise escaping, I realized how utterly ridiculous I was being. I was a Gryffindor for Merlin's sake, it was just a bloody forest and I couldn't even hear the screams from this far away.

Consciously I tried slowing my breathing, after a few moments I could feel the difference, meaning I started to think rationally again. If I turned my body 180 degrees and walked straight back I would end up back at the campsite where the trees wouldn't block the moonlight and I could at least see what was happening. I could go back to our tent get my wand and use a point me spell to Ash and hopefully she would be with the twins and the Weasleys.

As I started to get up to go back the way I 'thought' I came I heard a faint rustling in the bushes to my left. Freezing instantly I waited listening intently to the sounds around me. I heard what sounded like footsteps, and a definite snapping of a twig. I held my breath trying to get a glimpse of who it was, I could tell their was only one person, and they sounded like they were fairly light on their feet.

"MORSMORDRE" A deep throaty voice rang through the small clearing I was standing on the edge of. A dark green beam of light shot upwards to the sky finally taking shape about fifty feet in the air. It was a green skull with a snake twining around it. Every single person in the wizarding world knew that sign, The Dark Mark.

Before I could stop myself a startled hiss ran escaped my mouth, quickly turning my eyes away from the mark to the figure that cast it I saw him turn his head in my direction. I could see him faintly know from the greenish glow of The Dark Mark, his short dark hair was cropped close to his head and his nose seemed rather too large for his face.

He seemed vaguely familiar though I knew I had never seen him before. His tongue darted out the left side of his mouth and swept across his lower lip twice in quick succession, before his face turned maniacal and he started towards me. We were only about fifteen feet away from each other, and I had a feeling this guy was going to go straight for the killing curse and I had no way to defend myself.

If I somehow made it out of this alive I would get someone to show me hand to hand combat or maybe even see if I can get a sword like they had in the days of Godric Gryffindor. The figure raised his hand to my chest when he was ten feet away from me, I watched in utter rapture as his lips opened to form a curse "AVA-"

The figure was cut off by the sound of twenty cracks of apparation; I saw his eyes dart around at the noise as he dissapparated, before finishing the curse. I ducked as twenty wands glowed red before twenty stunners were set off simultaneously.

From my vantage point on the ground I watched in utter fascination as 19 of the twenty wizards went down from someone else's stunner. A startled laugh escaped my lips as they fell to the ground.

"Harry?" The soft smooth voice of the only wizard standing questioned as she ran towards me.

"Mum?"

"Harry what are you doing here, you were supposed to stay in the tent with everyone else!" Knowing the danger had past I couldn't help but roll my eyes as my body sagged slightly from loosing all the adrenaline.

"Orion ran from the tent looking for padfoot, making Rose and everyone else follow. I got separated from them and thought I saw a flash of red in the trees so I came into the forest and got incredibly lost."

Mum grabbed the edge of my shirt and yanked me upright pulling me into a brief hug; "O I am so glad your okay anything could have happened to you out here tonight." I felt muscles twitch systematically throughout my body as realization of how close I really came to catastrophe tonight really registered. My grip tightened on my mum for a moment before I released her.

"Mum where's dad I need to tell him about this man I saw so he can make a report on it." Since my dad was an auror I knew that if I told him about the psycho man that was casting The Dark Mark, he could get a team together to try and find him. I noticed mum start laughing quietly, the light from her wand allowing me to see her face as her quiet laughter turned to full blown laughs. "Mum what's so funny?"

Once she calmed down she pointed to the people lying on the ground. I had totally forgot about the apes that shot stunners at each other, which made me, laugh again. Smiling brightly mum said, "Well your father is here somewhere." I felt my jaw drop slightly my dad fully trained auror, one of the best on the force didn't move from a stunner headed towards him when mum did. It was a good thing you-know-who was gone or we'd all be dead. "Let me just enervate the prat." Even though her head was turned away by this point I could hear the smile in her voice, "Sirius is amongst them as well."

I couldn't wait to tell Ash about this one, we could tease dad and Padfoot for ages with material like this. I'm sure that Moony and Wormtail would get a kick out of it too, so I would have to remember to tell them later.

As I was contemplating how best to torment the two 'best' aurors about this, mum had been enervating the 19 wizards who had been stunned. Their groans brought me back to the present. I vaguely heard Sirius and Dad muttering, 'Definitely did not see that one coming.' And 'better obliviate my godson before he can tell the wife and kids.'

Before I could respond to Sirius' comment someone started shouting at me, "I will have you locked in Azkaban boy! How dare you go off shooting The Dark Mark in the middle of the forest!"

I was definitely too shocked to respond, so it was a good thing I didn't have too, "Watch what you say to my son Barty." My dad practically growled at this Barty. "He would never cast that abomination, plus he doesn't even know how to cast it! He just turned fourteen for Merlin's sake."

After looking from my dad who was glaring at Barty to Sirius who was beside him also glaring daggers, than to my mum who looked ready to spit fire I slowly turned to where the voice of Barty was coming from.

As soon as I looked at his face I gasped. His hair was slightly longer, and his middle definitely rounder but he looked like a much older version of the man who cast the mark and was going to attack me. Before I could comment on the similarities or even tell anyone of the man I had seen before, another man stepped in.

"Well I can solve this problem, we must simply check the boys wand to see if he cast The Dark Mark." This man was blonde and slightly taller than his companions with an odd bowler hat on his head.

"Excellent idea Diggory." A short stocky man proclaimed who was standing just to the left of Diggory. I wasn't sure what to tell everyone, I didn't even have my wand on me but I wasn't sure if they would even believe that. Well of course my parents would but I wasn't sure how the other adults would take it.

"What are you waiting for Mr. Potter!" Spat Barty, "We don't have all evening." I would have asked how he knew my name except I realized that he knew my dad so he just put two and two together.

"Ugh." I Hesitated again I felt like such an idiot, "I actually don't have my wand, I left it in the tent in all the confusion." I felt heat flame to my cheeks in embarrassment I knew how stupid it was for a wizard to part with their wand. I started twisting my hands together until I felt a strong hand come to rest on my shoulder.

Looking over my shoulder I saw the familiar presence of my father standing just behind me and to the left. He smiled slightly at me letting me know that he didn't think I was completely useless for having forgotten my wand at the site.

"LIES!" Cried Barty, "You probably threw your wand away just before we arrived." Looking around frantically for a moment Barty shouted again, "Well search the area you fools, look for this child's wand. I want to get this delinquent behind bars as soon as possible."

I felt my heart beating faster, why wouldn't this man believe me, "If Harry said he left his wand in his tent than he did, my son is no liar!" My mom snapped looking at her I could see her green eyes blazing in anger. The people who had gone off to search the forest paused for a moment most likely due to the venom in mums voice before continuing their search.

There was a tense silence as others searched as my parents and Sirius stood by me, the pressure of dad's hand on my shoulder tightening slightly as time past, was completely reassuring. As we waited I started thinking about that man again, "Dad?" I whispered I felt his hand squeeze my shoulder in comfort and acknowledgement, "I know who made the mark."

As I spoke the hand tightened more before dad released me and spun my torso around quickly so I could face him, I noticed that mum and Sirius were looking at me intently. "Harry who was it."

I hesitated only a moment before describing the man, "He was fairly tall, younger than you are but probably only by a couple years, he had short dark hair and his nose seemed rather too large." I looked into my dads hazel eyes, I could see him mentally going through faces he knew trying to figure out who it could be. I knew character habits were important to aurors too so I continued, "I was sitting at the edge of the clearing deciding what to do when I heard him approaching. I stayed really quiet to listen to him. He was really light on his feet like he was used to having to be quiet. His voice was pretty low too, when he yelled mors- something. The mark scared me a bit."

At the comment I averted my eyes; embarrassed. Dad wouldn't be scared of a mark in the sky, "Well I made a sound I guess when I saw it and he turned to look at me, his tongue came out of his mouth like some lizard or something, and he did that twice before pointing his wand towards me and starting to come after me. You guys appeared when he was just ten feet away and he dissapparated before you could see him."

My guardians were silent for a moment before Sirius started muttering, "Sounds like that death eater we imprisoned after the last war." Sirius grabbed my arm to get my attention, green eyes met hazel as Sirius whispered, "Harry did he look like any one you've seen before?"

I was so absorbed at first I didn't notice that the others had been listening to the last part of our conversation, but before I could answer Barty cut me off, "He's making this bloke up I know it." At his comment I felt hot rage travel my veins, I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time I didn't do anything, and this guy just seemed to want to blame me no matter what I said.

Turning sharply on my heel I faced the older man, "I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!" I shouted, "HE ALMOST KILLED ME!" As I stared at Barty completely livid my thoughts slipped out completely uncensored, "AND I THINK THAT YOU TOOK AN AGING POTION OR SOMETHING BECAUSE THE MAN LOOKED JUST LIKE YOU!"

I watched as Barty stiffened completely and his expression completely closed off, the gasps from my accusation were hardly noticed as I smirked in satisfaction. This man was incredibly daft. I stopped listening as the adults started arguing passionately, I simply stared at Barty our eyes locked, all other noise completely in the background.

He was upset I could tell, I had a feeling he knew something the others didn't but I was sure he wouldn't say anything. My mums voice broke through my thoughts, "Well I am taking my son back now, obviously he didn't do anything wrong and he's told us everything he knows." In my peripheral vision I could see my mum step closer to me as she put her arm around my shoulder, "I also need to check on my daughter and the other children that are with me. I will leave this arguing to you professionals."

We started walking away; my mum was gripping my shoulders tightly almost painfully. "Mum?" looking at her face in that moment scared me more than anything, she looked as if someone she loved was going to die. Her entire face was tight and tears were brimming in her eyes.

She seemed completely oblivious to my stare, "Mum?" I repeated slightly louder this time, when she still didn't acknowledge me I stopped walking. She continued forward for a few steps before she realized I wasn't following her.

"Come on Harry, let's get back to the tent." I refused to move when she tugged on my shoulder. I wanted her to look me in the eye. I felt her hand glide across my shoulder and down my arm. Her fingers wrapped around mine as she pulled trying to make me walk forward.

"Why do you look like someone died mum?" For some reason I wasn't panicking, I had a feeling that everyone else was alright, but the look on her face was one of complete foreboding like someone was dying, or she thought someone would die.

I watched as she blinked back her tears that had yet to fall and plaster a fake smile on her face, "I just could have lost you tonight, its nothing I'm being silly." She brushed it off and started walking again I followed reluctantly. She was lying to me; she looked so incredibly false in that moment.

I heard two sets of footsteps running after us and when I turned to look I saw the glow of two wands lighting up the faces of Padfoot and Prongs. Their breathing was slightly labored as they slowed near us.

Dad and Sirius looked towards mum, I figured they saw what I did when I looked at her face before because Sirius inhaled sharply as I watched dads face crumple into a look of utter defeat. Looking back towards my mum I saw tears in her eyes again. My mum was usually so strong and usually Sirius or dad would have made a joke about the situation by now but suddenly the three of them looked older than I had ever seen them look before.

"What's wrong?" None of them answered me but as I looked between their faces I saw them trying to compose themselves, though it seemed to be taking a while. "Tell me!" I raised my voice trying to get their attention.

My fathers face snapped to mine, he stared at me the weight of the world seemingly on his shoulders before he lunged at me. Completely startled I took a step back. His arms wrapped around me tightly cutting off my air supply as he held me tightly as if I would disappear at any moment. I felt mum hug me from behind and wrap her slim arms around both dad and me.

I couldn't comprehend why they were acting like this I mean I was fine, looking over to Sirius in hope of some help, I was not prepared for the look of defeat to be on his face too. When our eyes met his breath hitched, "O pup." He whispered, before he too joined the hug.

I was completely smothered, and I had no idea why they weren't acting like this before back in the clearing. I felt extremely uncomfortable with this situation because they were holding me as id I was the one who had died. "You're squishing me." I choked out as I tried to wriggle my way out of their grasps.

Slowly they disentangled themselves, but they were still staring at me, I shifted uncomfortably and fixed my jumper smoothing out non-existent wrinkles. "I want to make sure everyone else is alright can we go back now."

That seemed to break them out of whatever stupor they were in. I watched as their eyes widened in sync, it would have been comical if dad had not whispered, "Aisling." Like she had died.

Suddenly mum grabbed my hand and all three adults started sprinting through the forest in the direction of our site. Three wand tips glowed casting odd shadows in the forest around us as we ran. Honestly I was perplexed they were acting extremely odd.

They didn't slow as we emerged from the trees or as we passed ruined tents. I saw our previously maroon tent in the distance though in the moonlight it looked almost black. Getting closer so I could make it out better I realized that our tent was scorched like someone had set it on fire but it didn't burn through the material.

"And I thought Prongs was stupid for getting a flame resistant tent." I heard Sirius mutter from my left side. Even though tonight had been extremely dramatic I couldn't stop the slight smile that crossed my face. I knew exactly why dad had bought a flame retardant tent, and it was two words, Marauders pranks.

That thought combined with looking at the tent caused my smile to slip off of my face as quickly as it had come. No prank caused this, those black robed men did this. After seeing The Dark Mark, I realized that they were most likely Death eaters. I was too young during the last war to have ever seen or remembered seeing a death eater and there were no pictures of their ensemble in the books that talked about the war.

I had to admit I was confused I thought Voldemort had been murdered and all the Death Eaters were incarcerated years ago. Before I could analyze the situation further mum had pulled me through the tent. As soon as we entered I saw that Alexa was standing and the twins Ash and the Weasleys were sitting on the armchairs all looking tense.

Three exclamations of "DADDY!" followed by one "MUM!" rounded off by five shouts of "HARRY!" greeted us as soon as the group on the armchairs saw who had just walked into the tent.

"Mate what happened to you?" I heard Ron ask as he approached to pat me on the back.

"Got lost in the woods looking for you guys." I muttered as I watched my parents run to Ash and sandwich her small body in between them. After checking his children thoroughly Sirius went over and wrapped his arms around Ash as well.

After several moments I noticed Ash start squirming. I was vaguely aware that Ron was still talking but my thought process was completely consumed with thoughts of why the Death Eaters were running around, and why the mark was cast, and why the hell were my parents acting like either me or Ash was going to die.

I stared as my parents finally released Ash and she ran away from them. Though I saw her coming it still shocked me when she jumped on me, I stumbled as she wrapped her arms and legs around me, but luckily I didn't completely fall over.

"Harry I was so worried about you!" She cried in my ear as she clung to me. "Right after we left we saw Alexa and she brought us back but you were gone! I couldn't find you! I was so afraid something happened to you!" I felt Ash start going into hysterics so I began murmuring to sooth her. It always worked on Nymphadora when she was upset.

"Hey I'm okay. I was out looking for you; we got separated. It's all going to be okay now though. Nothing to worry about I promise." Shaking slowly subsiding Ash lifted her head to look me in the eye, "See my little dream everything's alright." I chuckled as she scowled at me and jumped out of my arms.

Placing her hands on her hips she stared at me, "Don't call me your little dream you know I hate it." I tried to hold in my laughter as she tapped her foot, she looked absolutely ridiculous and reminded me off how Rosalie looked earlier this morning.

"But that's what your name means; dream." My laughter turned to a flinch of pain as she punched me as hard as she could in the shoulder "what?" I sighed, reaching up to rub my shoulder in efforts to sooth the pain throbbing there.

"That's worse than using my full name!" She shrieked I made sure my face looked confused as I turned to Ron who was standing beside me and fake whispered.

"You mean she doesn't like being called Aisling?" Ron smiled at me all terror of earlier in the evening gone from his face as he watched Ash and I interacting. I covered my ears as Ash shrieked before she lunged at me.

Luckily I knew what was coming and darted away from her. Even though I was still worried about the other revelations tonight I knew that the twins and Ash and Ginny were still scared so it would be better for everyone if I distracted them.

So as I was running around the main room darting between armchairs and people I alternated between yelling 'my little dream' and 'Aisling Lily Potter'. Soon the room was filled with laughter as Ash started yelling about all the ways she was going to kill me.

When my eyes caught sight of my parents whispering heatedly to each other in one corner of the room I suddenly froze. Things I had momentarily forgotten came crashing back into my brain at once. My body didn't even register the shock of Ash jumping on my back and slapping the back of my head until we had both fallen to the ground.

Ash didn't stop right away as she straddled my back continuing to slap me muttering about how she wished she could use her wand outside of school. The pains registered but on a much dimmer level as most of my senses were focused on my parents.

After a few moments of no response from me Ash seemed to stop, I heard her voice "Harry?" speaking hesitantly but I couldn't answer. I had never seen my parents have a serious argument before. They looked extremely upset though from their body language I wasn't sure if it was at each other or the events that had happened tonight.

Suddenly my mum burst into tears and everyone in the room noticed because they had been quiet watching my sister and I. My parents who seemed oblivious to everything around them embraced quickly. Mum throwing her arms around dad, as she seemed to melt into him and him wrapping her tightly in his muscular arms. There pajamas were disheveled and in the dim lighting you could see tear tracks glistening on mums face.

"We'll firecall Albus as soon as we get home." I heard my dad whisper into her ear. It was meant to be just between the two of them but everyone heard. Looking around at the others in the room Sirius seemed to be the only one who understood their plight as his shoulders sagged and he reached for Rosalie who was closest to him.

"Mummy?" Ash called quietly almost hesitantly. I understood the wavering quality of her voice, our mother was always so strong and both of our parents looked so broken in that moment that I felt my world start careening wildly out of control. I had no idea why the sense of foreboding filled me, but suddenly I felt that things would never be the same, and I somehow sensed that whatever happened tonight could break my family.

I felt my eyes water at the thought. My family was everything to me. I would die for them, even if only to never have to see my parents look like this again.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

I wanted to know why Dumbledore had come over at four in the morning. After my parents had realized everyone was watching them they put on fake smiles and mum had wiped her tears away. Sirius had smiled and made some jokes, but the light atmosphere had been tarnished.

My parents thought it would be best if they took the Weasleys home, because their parents would hear about what happened and be extremely worried. So Dad and Sirius had waited for them to repack their stuff and for us to say goodbye to each other before they walked them to the apparation point and apparated them via side-along back The Burrow.

The rest of us waited outside of the tent as mum magicked it back to the miniature version before placing it in her pocket. The area was extremely eerie. Random Irish and Bulgaria paraphernalia was scattered around the ground in between scorched and destroyed tents.

The area that had been teeming with life and energy hours ago looked utterly depressing. All the others had already left, and it seemed our family was the only group left in this war zone.

The moment dad got back we portkeyed home, for some odd reason Sirius refused to let his family go home, he said that he needed to be their for James tonight and nothing could make him leave the manor. I couldn't comprehend what was going on, I knew tonight was devastating and many people were upset, and hundreds were probably injured as well, but why were my parents acting like tonight was so much more significant for our family.

As soon as we had gotten home Sirius settled the twins in the guest rooms, Alexa had to stay with Rosalie because she was extremely distraught. My parents had all but forced Ash and I into our rooms. I had tried to argue with them but it was to no avail. Something was seriously wrong and when I heard Sirius bringing Dumbledore upstairs twenty minutes ago I knew I needed to know what this was about.

I mean I knew my parents and my headmaster were friends but seriously what was the bloke doing over here at this ungodly hour. A sinking feeling in my stomach told me I knew exactly why he was here, it all had to do with the way my parents had been acting tonight.

Well I wouldn't let this family fall apart, I would find out whatever was upsetting my parents and I would fix it. There was no margin for failure, it didn't matter what it was, it needed to be fixed, Ash was upset, my parents were devastated and I could already feel tendrils of tension dancing through the house.

Creeping as silently as I possibly could I ducked out of my room and into the hallway. I saw light leaking into the otherwise dark hallway from my fathers study, and I heard faint voices coming from the room.

Pressing against the wall I quietly navigated my way towards the door. When I was about five feet away the voices became much more distinct.

"I thought he was gone Albus! I don't understand how he's back!" My mum sounded rather frantic, but it took me a moment before understanding dawned and I realized they must have been referring to you-know-who.

My breath caught in my throat was that man I saw earlier he-who-must-not-be-named? I felt the breath I was holding whoosh out as I realized I was being mental, He had been murdered it was impossible for him to be back.

"Lily I do not believe Voldemort was there tonight." My body involuntarily flinched at the sound of the name and I could practically feel my parents flinch along with me. Dumbledore was nutters everyone knew you weren't supposed to say _his_ name.

"Thank Merlin he's not back." My dad exhaled in relief, "See Lily I told you everything was going to be aright."

I was just about to head back to my room, once I realized that it had all been a false alarm, my world was not crumbling like I had previously been afraid of.

"Alas James." The tone in the Headmasters voice made me pause, "I am not sure he was ever gone." My eyes widened at the comment, NEVER gone? That was absurd, apparently my godfather agreed with me.

"I don't know what your on! Maybe its those blasted lemon drops you're so fond of, but everyone knows you-know-who was murdered thirteen years ago!" Sirius voice was full of determination but I also heard a hint of fear as well.

There was a pregnant pause in the room, "I have pondered this for thirteen years and the prophecy clearly says the only one that can truly kill Voldemort is the prophecy child." After flinching at the name yet again I was utterly confused. Why were they talking about a prophecy? And who was this prophecy child? "Sometimes I wonder if maybe he simply faked his death."

My gasp was lost in the sound of three adults inhaling quickly, but I was sure they would hear my heartbeat in the study. My parents had told us about the horrors of _his_ reign, and to even think that he was still alive made my entire body convulse in fear.

"But why?" I heard my mums frantic whisper, "Why would he fake his death Albus this isn't possible he HAS to be dead."

"I do not know my child. Voldemort is a strange man, I cannot pretend to understand why he does the things he does. His sole quest in life has always been power." Dumbledore paused seemingly to collect his thoughts, "I do know however that only the prophecy child can truly finish him."

I really wanted them to talk more about this prophecy something about it felt important to me.

"And either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives." I heard my dad whisper brokenly, he sounded very close to tears. Me on the other hand was simply confused. They were talking about Voldemort still being at large but what? In hiding?

I heard my mum start crying again and I faintly heard her whisper "not my babies" as if somehow this prophecy had something to do with her children.

The room was very silent save for a rustling of clothing that sounded like someone readjusting their position. I figured it was most likely my father moving to comfort my mother, but there was no way I could know for sure seeing as the door was only slightly ajar.

"If it makes you feel better my dear, I do not believe Voldemort is anywhere in England." So Dumbledore was fairly positive than that _he _was still at large. Why had he never said anything until know than if he was so sure the man was still alive? "I also do not believe that what happened this evening at the World Cup was his idea."

My mums sobs seemed to be quieting as Dumbledore spoke, "I believe tonight's events were simply planned by drunken men who wish their master was not dead."

"You mean that IF and I mean IF you-know-who s alive none of his followers know he is?" Sirius sounded very disbelieving, "you honestly think he faked his death and didn't even let his followers know he was still alive. He is just letting them go about their lives as if he never existed?"

"As I said before my boy I cannot begin to pretend I understand Voldemort." He paused as I reflexively flinched, "But it has come to my attention that odd occurrences and weird magic flows have been reported recently in Albania, I believe he may be there, why? I have no idea." I figured that everyone in the room was simply looking at each other, as it was very silent for a long time.

My muscles felt extremely tense, and my body was screaming for sleep, my mind however was as alert as it has ever been. So many questions were speeding through my mind I couldn't slow one down enough to really grasp it.

"I believe it would be safest for your family in light of recent events if you were to go back into hiding." Dumbledore spoke quietly but I knew that all the adults were listening intently to him just as I was. Why _had_ my family been in hiding for four years when I was younger? Why _were_ they talking about doing it again? When no one else had except the Longbottoms.

"NO!" cried both my parents at once, ending any further analyzing on my part. "Neither Aisling or Harry have even been marked by you-know-who, I refuse to be locked up like some animal again." My father continued, "If you-know-who does come back we will go under fidelius again but I can't put my families life on hold again Albus. I mean it still is possible that the prophecy is not talking about either of my children…"

I heard my father continue speaking, but I could no longer hear him. The blood in my veins was throbbing, all I could hear was a terribly loud ringing in my ears, as all my muscles clenched and unclenched systematically.

I felt my body stumbling backwards in the direction of my room; my muscles were made of lead. My seeker reflexes completely failed me as I fell unceremoniously to the floor.

I watched as the door to the study opened, all I could do was stare wide eyed as Sirius head poked out and his hazel eyes met my emerald. I watched his lips move and I knew he was talking to me but all I could hear was ringing.

The prophecy was either about Aisling or I. What did the rest of the prophecy even say? Was there any chance that it was about another child? What had dad meant marked by you-know-who? No wonder my parents looked like somebody had died! They probably thought whichever one of us the prophecy was about was destined to die. No child could ever defeat the most powerful dark lord in history.

Especially because apparently the supposed mystery man who murdered him, never actually murdered him! No human could go up against him except maybe Dumbledore and they expected a kid to beat him? Everyone in the world was obviously mental.

The ringing kept getting louder; this was going to destroy my family. I could already see us falling apart, "NO!" I didn't realize I had screamed my denial to the destruction of my family at the top of my lungs until, other sounds crashed into my mind. Three separate doors opening as Ash, the twins and Alexa came out to see what was happening all looking extremely groggy.

My parents followed by Dumbledore exiting the study asking me what was wrong. I noticed that three of the adults in front of me had red puffy eyes from their tears and the fourth looked hundreds of years older than he really was.

Every one was asking me if I was all right, I knew that I would be in massive trouble for eavesdropping and Ash would go on about how I was becoming more Slytherin because of Daphne. I wasn't sure what came over me but I pushed my self up off the floor shook my head and looked towards my dad, "sorry bad dream about tonight I think I was sleep walking or something." I mumbled, "I just need a glass of water sorry for waking you up."

I knew my mum could read me better than anyone so she would know I was lying but for some reason I felt it was extremely important I not let them know I knew about this mysterious prophecy. I knew only the four of them and maybe the Longbottoms (who were now insane) were most likely the only people who knew about this prophecy and if they found out I knew I would probably be obliviated for my own safety or something.

Mechanically I made my way downstairs and poured myself a glass of ice water. Sitting at the island sipping the freezing beverage my mind was whirling. I could not let my family be destroyed, I could already see an old pain seeping back into my parents eyes, and all of the conversation between the four adults was systematically repeating itself in my head.

There had to be something I could do to fix this. To make the pain leave their faces, and to protect Aisling, if one of us had to be this 'prophecy child' I prayed to Merlin it was me. I needed to protect my family, if _he_ killed my sister-

The feel of sharp pains in my hand halted my thought process; I looked towards the fist that had been holding the glass. I had crushed the glass in my fist, if i didnt feel so numb I would have probably dwelled on where I had gotten the strength to do that. However all I saw when I unclenched my fist and heard the pings of random glass bits falling to the marble island, was blood oozing from various cuts on my palm and fingers as it made red tracks along my ivory skin before dripping into the pool of water on the counter, turning the previously clear liquid pink with my blood.

AN-P.S this is NOT some cutting story or something, Harry's just in shock!! Also ALL I KNOW Harry cant say Voldemorts name yet and he flinches like everyone else, but remember his entire life has been different up to this point so he was raised with fear of Voldemort just like everyone else (besides don't worry our little hero will overcome that obstacle eventually). Also just so you know there is only 1 more chapter after this one for 'SETUP' Purposes.

If that doesn't make sense to you let me quickly explain. The way I planned this story the first three chapters are like an extended prologue but not. The official prologue was with Snape in chap1, the unofficial prologue is setting up Harry's life and giving the reason why things got so 'out of hand' one might say. So after the next chapter well start getting into the really good stuff, that my fingers are practically twitching in anticipation even THINKING about writing it! Thanks for reading and see you next time!


	3. The Aftermath

AN thank you all so much for all the review, alerts and favorites

**AN – I just wanted to say thank you to all of those who have reviewed, or added me to your c2, alert or fav lists. It honestly means so incredibly much to me to hear your thoughts on my story. **

It was the first time I had felt at peace all week. The heat of the late summers day sun pounding into my flesh and momentarily warming the chill that had been ever present in my bones since Monday morning as the summers' breeze swirled gently through my robes as they dangled from my position on my broomstick.

I was higher than the goal posts on either end of the quidditch pitch so I estimated I was a good 200 feet above the ground. I could feel the rod of my firebolt against the spine of my back and underneath my crossed ankles.

Balancing on my broomstick like this was one of my favorite past times, my broomstick had always felt like an extension of myself. I know many people thought I was insane. I would fly standing on my feet using my body weight to change the direction of the broom, sometimes I did handstands on my broom in flight, or would pull into impossible dives, or barrel rolls. What really got people screaming though was when I would fly high in the sky and simply jump of my broom twisting and turning in the sky as I fell only to summon my broom and use my hands to grab the broom and swing my body back on it only to take off again.

I knew I was a legend in the sky; after all it was in my blood. Dad flew like me, impossibly fast and fierce, looking for all the world as if he owned the sky. The air was like a playground of untapped potential when you could fly, using the laws of gravity to give the best possible adrenaline rush; I was completely fearless when I flew.

If only I could feel so fearless in all aspects of my life.

Even the tranquility I felt floating above ground would not let me escape the truth of the fact that the weight of the world was on Ash, or my shoulders. The numbness of fear gripped me again, how could either of us face an evil so intense it brought fear to our entire world? The sick feeling in the pit of my stomach was agonizing.

I felt as if I would overload with all the conflicting emotions running through my body. I was afraid, mind-numbingly afraid about so many things. Mostly though I was afraid for the ones I loved. Even the simple knowledge of the prophecy whether it was known or not to that particular member of the family was destroying us.

Since the World Cup I could feel the waves of tension floating through my home, suffocating me. The dynamics of our family were being ripped apart as our parents struggled to keep the atmosphere in the house cheerful. They were trying so hard to pretend that everything was normal that things had become incredibly awkward.

They laughed too loud, and smiled too big, while their eyes told all their secrets. It was obvious they were both being haunted by old fears and worries resurfacing. Their eyes were swirling vortexes of a horde of emotions battling for dominance.

For all the pain and sorrow reflected in my parents' eyes, and the all-encumbering numbness of my body, I sensed that Ash was the most affected. I have always believed her to be somewhat empathetic. She was always so in tune with everyone around her, and even though she didn't understand why things were strained I knew she felt it.

When we were younger and she would have a bad dream she would sneak into my room, and cuddle up beside me before drifting off again. She used to tell me that she always felt safer with her big brother. Her 'need to feel protected' had not shown itself since the evening before her first year of Hogwarts. However since my 'sleepwalking' incident, she had spent every night in my room.

I could tell by the way she had taken to carrying herself the last few days that she was frustrated. Her auburn eyebrows seemed constantly furrowed as she surveyed our family, most likely trying to figure out where the chink in our armor was.

She wasn't the only one frustrated.

Our normally open and boisterous family seemed somewhat subdued, even though the laughter still flowed in abundance. My parents seemed to slowly be regaining their composure, but that just seemed to frustrate and anger me more. If you-know-who was really still out there than another war was looming on our horizon. Furthermore, regaining their composure wasn't allaying their worries or fears they were simply hiding them.

I couldn't help but feel slightly betrayed at their actions. If they were seriously considering the possibility that one of us could be the 'prophecy child' why weren't they telling us? Why were they not trying to prepare us for the inevitable? I mean if there was a chance it was either Ash or I shouldn't we know of its existence and be training or something?

Yet at the same time I was oddly grateful that they never said anything when I was younger. I knew I would not have been able to cope with something like that; hell I was barely coping with it now.

To top it all off I was relieved, even though Ash felt the tension in the house too she knew nothing of this, and I wanted to keep it that way. A rush of protectiveness filled me as I thought about the fact that this prophecy could be pertaining to Ash.

I felt the tingle of my magic running through my veins, "I swear on my life and magic that I will do everything in my power to change fate if you're the prophecy child Aisling Lily Potter. I refuse to let the weight of our world fall on your shoulders, this burden will be mine and I will bear it."

I saw the flash of blue light engulf my body, as my words were lost in the wind. Sitting up abruptly I had a sudden moment of clarity. I needed to know the full contents of the prophecy if I was going to save my sister from the cruel hands of fate. The first real smile in days graced my lips as I repositioned my grip on the broom and dropped from the sky like a bullet.

I could save my family. I had no idea how I would do it, but I would force circumstance, I would shoulder the weight and protect the ones I cared about. I would make sure I was the one who was marked and when you-know-who came out of whatever hole he was hiding under I would kill him. Even if I had to strap one of those muggle bombs to myself and hug him so we both exploded into nothingness.

I smiled wryly as my chuckles were lost in the whipping of the wind, _he_ would never see something like that coming. Pulling out of my descent and hopping off of my broom I lovingly caressed the wood before grabbing the handle out of the air, and slinging my baby over my shoulder.

The numbness, fear, frustration, and anger still pulsed through my veins but they suddenly seemed much more bearable now that I had something to focus on.

Walking barefoot along the heated wooden flooring of my house was incredibly soothing. The smooth heated floor practically caressed the pads of my feet as I walked determinedly towards the library to scour its contents in search of any and all information on prophecies.

This afternoon I felt like bludgeoning myself for not choosing divination as one of my electives last year. I mean sure Arithmacy was incredibly important pertaining to the make up of spells and ancient runes was fascinating and practical, but knowing anything about prophecies and the like would have made my life so much easier right now.

My knowledge about divination and its various branches was nil. Of course I heard about it in passing and Ron, Seamus, Dean, and Neville sure prattled on about the ridiculous nature of the art because of their teacher Trelawney, but they never said anything actually relevant.

I couldn't even simply ask my knowledgeable friend Hermione because she thought the subject was a pile of rubbish that should be incendio'd. So now I was forced to scanning our massive library about the subject and I wasn't even sure where I was supposed to look.

My time was limited dad would be off work soon, and it being a Friday most likely meant boys night. Every second Friday, every single year as long as I can remember was the official boys night. Of course 'The Marauders' were constantly together, we were practically all just one huge family, they still kicked everyone out of Potter Manor (were these nights were held), and proceeded to drink their weight in fire whiskey.

I used to be 'evicted' along with my mum and sister but at the beginning of the summer Sirius had dubbed me 'a man' and convinced everyone else to let me stay. He told me it was because I had a girlfriend and was mature for my age so they bumped up my age of 'induction' from 15 to just turning 14.

Though dad would only let me have one fingers worth of alcohol a night until I was fifteen, it was still a hell of a lot of fun. Sometimes they reminisced about their days at school, and pranks they pulled, or sometimes they planned new pranks. My favorite though was when they would make up games, or we would fly, or they would transform. It was hilarious to watch their drunken antics.

Though I knew I would enjoy myself tonight I really wanted to find out how you could review a prophecy that had already been made. It would be tedious trying to find anything relevant considering the sheer number of books in our library and I couldn't help wishing that I could simply ask my parents if they knew anything about it.

Asking them however would bring up the obvious question of why I wanted to know. I didn't have the excuse of taking the course, and I figured my mum would be able to piece together the situation and figure out my sudden interest was because I had been spying on them.

The library was painted in a tranquil blue with silver lace curtains that shimmered as the suns rays illuminated the large room. The tall arched windows let in plenty of light so none of the various candles around the room needed lighting.

There were six rows of six-foot tall bookshelves with shelves covering the south and west wall crammed with books, both old and new. There were hundreds of books that had been collected over the past thousand years and passed down in the potter line.

Their was a small section beneath one of the windows were two plush love seats were positioned in an L formation, for perusing your selection of books. I sighed it would be no good to gaze longingly at the couches when I had a mission to complete.

Trying to find anything on prophecies or divination was looking to be like an impossible objective. I had already gone over the majority of tomes in the library and I had yet to happen on even one book on the subject, apparently even a thousand years ago the Potters thought divination was rubbish.

The feelings that had been dimmed by my complete focus were swirling and trying to reclaim a prominent foothold in my mind, as my distress became more and more obvious. "This is absolutely ridiculous." I sighed as I pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration. My other hand seemed to have a mind of its own as it begun to run through my unruly black hair.

"You do realize that your hair will just continue to stay untamable and 'ridiculous' no matter how many times you run your fingers through it right." My eyes snapped open in shock.

My dad was leaning against the wall of books casually with his arms and ankles crossed as he stood smiling slightly at me. From the way he was standing I could guess he had been watching me for a while.

"Why are you home early?" I blurted, though I was extremely bemused he wasn't due back for another two hours at least.

My dad laughed, real mirth shining in his eyes for the first time since Sunday, as he pushed himself off the wall and walked towards me slowly. "Did you fall off your broom or something today Prongslet?" I felt my eyebrows furrow in both annoyance and confusion, of course I didn't fall of my broom, I _never_ fell off my broom, unless it was on purpose. "I'll take that look as a no. Whatever has you so focused is screwing with your internal clock because I have already been home for an hour."

I felt my eyes widen in shock I had wasted hours staring at book titles and still hadn't found _anything? _"Err." Was my brilliant response. I tugged on the sleeve of my robe and stared at it with utter fascination, "I was looking for something."

I felt the pressure on my shoulder as my father placed his hand there and squeezed, "Need any help?" I felt a wave of gratitude towards my dad; I really did have amazing parents. Not many were so attentive to their family, I was sure he had plenty more productive things to do than search his library with his son.

Briefly I considered just asking him about prophecies and what he knew about them, when the roar of a lion sounded through the manor. That sound signalized an unauthorized apparation onto our property; my dad and I shared a look before quickly rushing from the library to the front door.

Of course it wasn't abnormal for a close friend of the family to pop in unexpected but my dad always authorized for all the Marauders on Friday nights, so we wouldn't have to hear the roar when they showed up. No one else apparated here unexpectedly, without sending an owl or floo-calling first.

I felt the numbing sensation take over my body as the random thought flitted through my mind that it could be a group of death eaters or you-know-who himself coming to eliminate the Potter family before they started another war. We should really set up more protective wards I thought as I slid down the banister into the entrance hall.

"Harry do not open that door." My dad shouted at me from the top of the stairs, in a determined voice. I could hear the slight tremor in his voice signaling he was worried, making me feel slightly less paranoid knowing my dad was probably worried about the same thing I was.

By the time my dad was close enough to open the door I could see my sister standing at the top of the stairs and my mum positioned slightly in front of her with her wand gripped firmly in her right hand.

Looking back towards my dad I watched in a mixture of curiosity and worry as he turned the handle of the brass knob before quickly opening the door.

"Wotcher Mr. Potter!" All the breath whooshed out of me as I took in the site of the 5'4 woman on our doorstep. She was wearing a sky blue robe, which was left unfastened showing off the fact that she was wearing muggle jeans and a white tank top, the look was unconventional but it suited her. Today she was sporting a button nose, mixed with her otherwise natural face structure, which she complemented with bubblegum pink hair and violet eyes.

Nymphadora was eclectic that I was sure of. "Nymphadora Tonks?" My dad sounded very shocked to see her, and honestly so was I.

I couldn't help but chuckle slightly as her pink hair flashed red with anger she really hated her first name. The numbness I had felt all week seemed to disperse completely looking at the woman on my doorstep.

A crooked smile spread across my face as I stepped into her view, maybe things really were going to change, and she hadn't been to my house in years. The moment I was in her view her hair went back to the eye-catching pink as she threw herself at me.

My arms automatically wrapped around her in response to her soft body pressing against mine, as her legs wrapped around my waist and she squealed. My senses were overloaded with vanilla as I shut my eyes in complete rapture. I had no idea what she was doing here or why she was throwing herself into my arms but I really couldn't give a shit in that moment.

Our moment was cut short by the pounding of feet on stairs as my sister shouted, "Tonks! Its so good to see you, you haven't been to our house in forever." Tonks slowly lowered her legs from my torso as she looked over to my sister. I relinquished my grip on her slightly disappointed as I watched her lean over slightly to hug my sister.

"Yeah, its good to see you too and don't worry from now on I'll start coming over more." So things really were going to change, she was planning on visiting more, elation spread through me with every beat of my heart. I watched as Tonks and my sister conversed amiably for a few minutes catching up on the happenings of the others life.

I heard my dad closing the door, so I looked over at him; he caught my gaze and looked pointedly to his watch. My elation dimmed slightly as I realized that my 'uncles' would be coming over at any moment and all the females would be 'evicted'.

I nodded in acknowledgement as he turned to walk back upstairs. Since my eyes had been following his movement I noticed my mum who was standing at the top of the stairs. When our eyes connected I realized she knew exactly where I stood when it came to Nymph.

Even though she was smiling slightly she shook her head in he negative, the look on her eyes was imploring and demanded my attention. She was letting me know she knew my feelings but she was conveying that I was still dating someone else.

Thinking about Daphne made me feel like a first class prat. Since I had comforted Nymph early Sunday morning I had not thought once about Daphne. Sure I had answered her letters but they were evasive and short, usually I put more effort into them, and as soon as the letter was answered she left my mind. I had not even thought about shagging her again.

I suddenly felt an overwhelming sense of guilt. What was I doing with Daphne, I felt absolutely horrible, if someone pulled that kind of stunt on my sister I would have surely ripped their head off, and here I was doing it to someone else.

The pure fire that shot through my forearm as a light pressure was applied shook me from my thoughts. "Hey Harry before you go somewhere I cant follow." Tonks chuckled as her hand squeezed my forearm, "I need to tell you something."

I placed one of my calloused hands on the smooth skin of her hand as it rested on my arm, "what's that?" I smiled thinking about how that particular shade of violet really brought attention to her exquisite face.

"I PASSED!" she squealed as she used her grip on my forearm to tug me towards her again so we could hug. The confusion I felt at her statement became the secondary emotion, as her excitement seemed to crackle in the air around me causing my smile to widen reflexively.

"Congratulations I knew you could do it." Seemed like the best response possible so I murmured into her ear, squeezing slightly.

She pulled away abruptly causing me to wonder if I said something wrong. My smile faltered as she scrutinized my face intently for a few moments as Aisling laughed from a couple of feet away. Suddenly she smiled slightly before slapping my arm, "You have no idea what I'm talking about do you, you oaf."

I smiled sheepishly at her, "err, honestly no."

"We'll at least your being honest with me." She smiled as I rolled my eyes, for some reason whenever I said 'honestly' she always responded that way. "I passed my apparation test just a couple of minutes ago." I felt stupid as soon as she said that, now that I thought of it that was the obvious answer, she did trigger the unauthorized apparation ward when she arrived. "And I have you to thank for it." She said as she poked me in the chest.

"Sorry love, but I am positive you passed the test on your own, considering I was at home all day and all." I watched as her face lit up in a smile as she simultaneously rolled her eyes at me.

"You prat! I _meant_ that if you hadn't encouraged me to go, I probably would have continued to put it off."

"Well I knew you would pass." I squared my shoulders and put on the most pompous expression I could manage, "and after all when am I ever wrong." I asked as I looked down my nose at her.

"A lot of the time actually." Ash piped in causing Tonks to laugh joyously, and me to growl in mock annoyance.

"That was rhetorical."

An exclamation of "HONEY I'M HOME!" sounded from behind me and reverberated off of the walls, echoing down the hall, I was pretty sure that no matter where in the house my dad was he would at least hear the echo of Padfoots shouting. I spun around only to be engulfed in a massive hug as Sirius greeted me, "Hey pup, ready to get wasted?"

I laughed as I heard Ash groan, "You know dad wont let me Padfoot." But he simply winked murmuring about how we would crack him one day. Sirius moved to greet Ash, so I turned back to talk to Nymphadora again before she would have to leave only to be interrupted again by Sirius.

"Well if it isn't my favorite lil Cuz'! What are you doing here? I haven't seen you in ages!"

My attention was diverted from watching the two cousins greeting each other as I noticed Peter walking in. "Hey Wormtail!" I exclaimed walking over to hug him, he was the same height as me 5'5, though he was much rounder around the midsection than the rest of my fathers friends, so I couldn't quite wrap my arms around him. His mousy brown hair was already receding a fair amount, but looking into his beady brown eyes you could tell he never paid much attention to his appearance.

"Harry I'm so glad you're alright, I would have visited sooner but things have been pretty busy in archives this week, what with last weekend and all." I frowned slightly at the mention of the Cup. Peter's anxious gaze and the slight shuffling of his feet caused me to brush aside those thoughts and where they would leave me.

"Ya I'm fine. Guess you heard all about that stuff with all the reports you would have had to file?" His eyes narrowed infinitesimally at that comment, I balked, I wasn't sure what I said I mean he _did_ work in archives in the auror department so he _would_ have seen all he reports when they came in. Thinking of a slight change of subject to avoid any awkwardness I pushed on, "Did you read anything about how dad and Sirius stunned each other, when they were trying to incapacitate me."

Peter's expression cleared as he laughed, "seriously?" I nodded enthusiastically, as he continued to laugh causing me to chuckle too remembering how funny that had been.

"What so funny cub?" Still laughing I looked over to Remus who was just walking through the door, smiling at the scene near the entrance.

"He just told me, that our dear padfoot and prongs incapacitated themselves while trying to bring him in." Peter got out through his laughter.

"That's not how it happened!" Shouted my dad, I never noticed him joining our congregation downstairs, and he must have joined when I had been talking to Wormtail.

Remus, the most reserved out of the four simply smiled as my dad and Sirius started arguing about the truth of my statements. Remus patted my shoulder in greeting as he came to stand beside me. I looked over at him, his amber eyes full of joy, as he surveyed his 'pack'.

He looked older than the rest of them, due most likely to his transformations and the strain they put on his body, his robes were fashionable but looked much more worn than any I owned, and his sandy blonde hair was already being peppered with gray.

I couldn't really comprehend how the ministry could look down on werewolves so much I mean moony was perfectly decent and he was able to fit into society just fine. Granted not many knew of his condition, only close friends and family, he would most likely resign from his post as our DADA professor if word got out. He really was not one for confrontation if it was avoidable.

"OKAY!" Sirius voice reverberated around the hall, "I did not leave the wife and kids at home to sit around yapping about this!" I laughed I knew he was only avoiding it because he felt stupid for being off his guard so much that he let himself get stunned by a fellow auror. "All the ladies in the building please exit the premises so us men can get our fun on!"

My mum came down the stairs at that moment with an overnight bag for her and Ash. I quickly said my goodbyes to my mum and sister before lingering in my goodbye with Nym as she promised that she would owl me soon.

The moment all the women were gone, Sirius ordered my dad to bring out the grub and glasses as he pulled out the fire whiskey from a pocket in his robe. We settled ourselves onto the beige leather couches in the living room, as we ate fish and chips, them sipping their whiskey as I enjoyed a glass of pumpkin juice.

Conversation was flowing easily and I could tell how these four had made it through 24 years of friendship and kept their bonds as strong as ever. The dynamics between them were captivating, and I couldn't help but smile. Looking over at my dad as he talked about some criminal him and Sirius had chased the other day at work, I noticed that the distraction of his friends had helped his composure.

Even though the pain and worry was still in his eyes, it was almost as if with being with his best mates he could forget about his troubles for the night. I wondered if Ron, Hermione and I would still be able to be as close as we were twenty years from now.

Obviously the dynamic between us and my father and his mates were different, but our trio fit together perfectly each of us complementing each other in a different way.

My contemplative mood was demolished when I felt a nudge in my side from Remus, "Hey cub." I arched my left eyebrow so moony would know I was all ears, "I was wondering if you would be interested in some extra lessons from me this year?"

My other eyebrow joined the first in my hairline at that comment. It was completely unexpected. "Not that I wouldn't love that moony." I hesitated only slightly, "But why?"

He chuckled as the lively conversation around us continued, "Well I know you really want to be an unspeakable." I smiled at that. My dream was to be an unspeakable, no one really knew what they did, I mean the only ones who knew what happened in the department of mysteries _were_ the unspeakables and they couldn't talk about their jobs to anyone. All anyone I talked to would say about them, was that they were fearsome and above the government. They were only talked about in hushed whispers after all.

And even if I didn't know what they did I knew it must be incredibly exciting and interesting, and I lived for exciting. It was one of the reasons I liked flying it was unpredictable, every time you went up in the air was different, and I had a feeling that was what being an unspeakable was like, unpredictable and exciting.

I knew that there were many different things in he department of mysteries but no one was allowed in there without express permission. Before I decided I wanted to be an unspeakable I wanted to be an auror like my dad, but the downfall to that job was that the ministry controlled them and honestly I thought Fudge was a moron.

"And I talked to Minerva for you." My lips twitched at that, Remus was so thoughtful. Technically my career conversation with my head of house wasn't due till my fifth year, so if Remus had anything relevant I would be a year ahead. "Now she told me that not really anyone knows who the unspeakables actually _are_ because they tend to hide it from everyone, and they don't accept kids out of school that she knows of. So she really didn't have anything to say when I asked what the requirements would have been." I could feel the frown marring my face that sucked. "But we did discuss it, and we both figured, that with them being so mysterious and somehow with them always knowing everything, they would notice someone if they were leaps and bounds ahead of their peers." I officially had no idea where moony was going with this.

"So I figured." He continued, "That if your owls next year were above average they would probably look twice at you, I mean they obviously recruit people, so we need to make you stand out."

That thought made me smile, "Sounds awesome Moony thank you so much, can we start as soon as school lets in?" He laughed at my enthusiasm as I hugged him tightly.

"You should get some of your ideas out there too Harry." I frowned at that, only my family, and Moony, Padfoot, and Wormtail, knew about my inventions, I even avoided the subject with my friends though they knew seemingly random objects fascinated me.

I was really interested in the creation of spells, and using runes on normal items to make them into something more complex, or things like my newest idea the 'spell-bomb' to be able to perform magic outside of school.

So far I hadn't gotten too far with any of my ideas, but I had a lot of things in the works at the moment. "But what would getting my ideas out their even do?"

Remus leaned towards me a conspiring look on his weathered face as he looked around quickly to make sure the others were still involved in their conversation before whispering, "I heard a man talking in a pub the other night." I nodded slowly in acknowledgment wanting him to elaborate.

"I heard him talking to his mate about how he accidentally got lost in the department of mysteries and that he walked into a few rooms, before he was forcibly removed." My heartbeat accelerated in excitement as I listened attentively to what Remus was saying. "He talked about how there was one room with simply a stone archway with runes engraved on it on a dais in the center of the room, there was also another room with a tank full of large brains in a strange liquid. He also said that there was a room full of objects he had never seen before, he said it looked like inventions or something that were either in progress or had been discarded but it looked like they were researching and inventing things." I could practically feel my eyes sparkling at that, they were interested in developing unique things, from what it sounded like. I was so absorbed in my thoughts of how my seemingly odd behavior pertaining to inventions made me even more suitable for my dream job I almost missed the last thing he said.

"He also mentioned seeing the hall of prophecies, but most people know about that so that wasn't as interesting. But don't you see Harry if you get your ideas out there that could also garner there interest because it sounds like their into researching and creation as well."

Remus paused most likely waiting for me to agree enthusiastically, asking him how to go about getting my ideas out there, and I would have been, if he hadn't mentioned prophecies. My mind was whirling frantically, the hall of prophecies.

"Prophecies." I choked out quietly, I didn't even mean to say it but it slipped out when I was opening my mouth to tell Remus how exciting I thought this was. The numb feeling was wrapping around me again, cloaking me in her cruel grasp.

Remus was frowning at me but nodded, "Yes" he said slowly, "The hall of prophecies is where all the prophecies ever made are stored, personally I think the other stuff is more exciting…" I knew he continued speaking and I felt myself nodding in response to whatever he was saying but I was no longer listening.

_Where all the prophecies ever made are stored. _Kept repeating in my head like a broken recording, over and over.

I felt my chest expand as I sucked in a large breath. If all the prophecies were kept there than this prophecy that my parents were so worried about would be there somewhere, if I could somehow get into that hall, I would be able to hear the whole thing and no one would be the wiser.

Well if I succeeded in getting there of course.

I felt myself grinning maniacally, "Thanks Moony." _For planting the seed of my new plan in my head. _ I heard him acknowledge my thanks, and tell me we could start on extra lessons in the fall and that he would help me get some of my inventions out there. But I wasn't really listening. I was already thinking about how I was going to pull the best prank of all time, too bad I couldn't tell anyone I did it.

I was going to break into the department of mysteries.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

"Mione?" I called to the bushy haired girl sitting across the table from me. Her eyes never strayed from_ Equations For Everyone_ by _Wulfric Weatherbee _the Arithmacy book se was currently reading, while making a humming noise to let me know she heard me.

I knew this situation was delicate due to the fact that Hermione was eerily perceptive. I didn't have to worry about Ron who was staring at a scroll of parchment frowning as he continuously wrote and than scratched out sentences face scrunched in confusion. He was completely oblivious to our conversation as he furiously tried to finish his potions essay that was due tomorrow morning.

Quickly looking around the Hogwarts library to ensure no one was listening, I set my quill down, "If you were trying to contain something." I watched as her brown eyes wandered from the text in the book, to my face her eyes lighting up in realization that we were going to have one of our 'hypothetical' discussions.

I knew she loved stimulating herself by trying to figure out a problem so I was bringing up something that had been stumping me for a while. It was already November and I _needed_ to finish my spell-bomb before winter break, which was only three weeks away.

"What kind of something are we trying to contain?" She asked excitement evident in her whispered tone. "Is it a sentient being? Liquid or solid? Hard or soft? Something that needs to say fresh or-" I cut her off knowing that she could continue questioning me all night before I got a word in edgewise.

"No none of those, something like say - energy." Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Energy Harry?" I nodded, as she bit her lower lip in thought. "Well muggles use wires to transfer energy from one place to another, and they monitor it by current and switchboards…" As fascinating as listening her go off on something muggle was, that's not what I was searching for. Plus I didn't want wires in my spell-bomb that just didn't make sense; the wires would most likely dampen the power of the spell.

"But can energy be contained? And if so than in what?" That was the real crux of my problem I had already figured out how to release the spell at a delayed rate when I was testing it out in jars, but for the life of me I couldn't figure how to store something for an infinite amount of time, let alone a few minutes.

"Harry energy can't be contained, muggles get energy from generators, which comes from plants, but you can't just store it someplace. Energy constantly circulates it doesn't stop in any place." I wanted to bang my head, I didn't want her thinking like a muggle, but I was afraid to push her too hard in fear of her realizing this wasn't really 'hypothetical'.

"I'm not talking about energy like that elikticity you told me about 'Mione."

She frowned, "your not? And its electricity." I scrutinized her countenance momentarily before continuing, brushing off her correction. Her forehead was creased in concentration as she lightly tapped the end of her quill to her chin.

"I mean like magical energy."

"Magical energy." She repeated, looking dubious.

She wasn't falling for my bait I wanted to groan in exasperation, why couldn't this conversation be going smoother. Merlin the way she was chewing her lip, I was surprised it wasn't bleeding.

"Harry." She dragged my name out slowly, "That question is rather elementary." I felt the skin at the corner of my eyes tighten, something I had been trying to figure out for months was _elementary._ "Its theoretically impossible to _contain_ magic. Wizards, and other magical beings have a magical core, but the magic travels through our bodies, as we constantly release and absorb magic. Even the magical ingredients we use in potions from magical plants or animals don't really contain magic. It's simply a conduit for magical energy to go through and the essence of magic lingers attracting more wild magic, before we use them."

"Well theoretically do you think its possible to say - contain a spell in an object?" Obviously being evasive wasn't working so I had to throw caution to the wind and hope she didn't realize I was up to something.

After a while of silence, the only noise at our table was the scratching of Ron's quill against his parchment. I had to hand it to him he really was focused tonight, she sighed. "Harry I just don't think it's plausible. We can charm things but we cant hold a spell somewhere." As she watched my face fall, her eyes narrowed, "why is the answer so important to you." Her eyes looked deeply into mine, as her lips thinned, making her face look disturbingly like professor McGonagall. "You have been acting rather odd since term started…. your not up to anything are you?" she demanded arching her right eyebrow accusingly.

I pretended to look stricken at her accusation but was saved the awkwardness of trying to answer as Daphne saved me.

"Pumpkin." She drawled, "I've searched the whole castle for you." Her curves pressed tantalizingly into my back, as she leaned over me. Her voice dropped to a low purr, "I wanted to talk to you."

To my left Ron snorted, her arrival obviously breaking his concentration. The way he suddenly seemed extremely fascinated with his quill as he started muttering something about 'bloody Slytherins' led me to believe that Daphne sent him an evil look from behind my shoulder.

After my mums 'look' as I had begun to dub it, I had tried to end things with Daphne. She loved me and I didn't love her it was unfair right? Well every time I had tried to 'talk' to her, she would practically jump me.

The sex had gotten extremely exciting though, the first few times had remained somewhat awkward, but as soon as we both gained confidence things had gotten incredibly interesting.

We would meet up several times a week, to try different positions and different techniques on each other, and honestly I hadn't even tried to end things with her once in the last month.

I knew I was being a prat and totally unfair but she was just such a good _distraction_ from the stress of pretending to be cheerful when I was planning something extremely illegal like breaking into the Ministry of Magic. Or thinking about the fact that you-know-who could still be out there, and the damn prophesy. On top of that it just felt bloody _good._

It didn't really help that when I told Ron I felt nothing for her, but I was finding it difficult to end things because of the sex he simply told me to go with the flow until something better came along.

The problem was my something better had come along it was just inconveniently out of my reach.

Nymphadora had kept true to her promise, visiting several more times before September 1st, when I went back to school and she began auror training. We had simply talked for hours, or played games of exploding snap, or even flew. I had missed her terribly at first going back to school, since I had just started getting used to having her around again.

But we kept up weekly correspondence, complaining about our classes, and discussing random things. I was pleased that she was refusing to date still, but at the same time I was frustrated because I wanted her to look at me as a potential interest, but I remained her 'best' friend as she dubbed me in one of her letters.

That sentence made me feel for Ron who obviously fancied the pants off of Hermione, though he refused to admit it. They were best friends, and I was beginning to realize how hard of a barrier that was to overcome. Even though technically I was being a complete arse even thinking about it considering I already _had_ a girlfriend and Nym _knew_ that. So it was slightly different than his case, but I could still empathize with the bloke.

From the way Daphne had started playing with the hairs at the nape of my neck and the way she was breathing against my ear, I knew exactly what she wanted, and as tempting as it was, I needed to figure my spell-bomb out or all my plans for my break in would be for naught.

"Daph, can we meet up later, me and Hermione were just discussing something important."

"How important?" she whispered before nipping at my earlobe making me groan, if my will was even remotely weaker I would have been bolting from this library.

"Very," I whispered, so she wouldn't be able to hear the huskiness of my voice.

"Honestly Harry it was not." Hermione rolled her eyes, "Unless it was important and you're hiding something." She glared. Daphne stomped her foot, and I couldn't help but smirk, she was annoyed that she still didn't know what we were talking about. Apparently Hermione deduced that as well, and by the way she was looking at Daphne pressing up against me she was also very annoyed we were 'demoralizing a sanctuary' as she would most likely phrase it. "We were simply discussing if it would be possible to contain magical energy."

"How quaint." Daphne replied, the sarcasm dripping from her voice, when I didn't move when she tugged on my shoulder she sighed. "Seriously why don't you just box it up in some metal or something and place some of those fancy runes you love so much on the container and be done with it." She pulled back from me dragging her hand quickly down my arm grabbing my hand and tugging again. "Now that the philosophical discussion is over can we leave."

I had tried storing it in metal that did nothing; the magic just seeped out of the holes you had to place in it to put the spell inside before you could seal it. Runes though that sounded promising, there were binding and releasing runes, their were runes for practically everything.

I know she was making fun of us and being sarcastic but my girlfriend had inadvertently been a genius.

Hermione was glaring at Daphne and Ron was pretending to be absorbed in his homework, but I didn't pay attention to them. Jumping up from my seat and in the process startling Daphne, causing her to yelp. That action earned us quite a few glares from surrounding tables and if Madame Pince had been anywhere nearby she would have probably had a few choice words to say.

None of that mattered though; I may have found the solution to my problem. Spinning around and grabbing Daphne roughly by the waist I pulled her tightly against me as I kissed her passionately. It was short but still portrayed my gratitude.

"I totally forgot I was supposed to meet my mum tonight." I said when I pulled away, quickly gathering my parchments and quills shoving them into my shoulder bag. "Sorry Daph, we can meet up tomorrow." I kissed her quickly again to stop her sputtering in protest; waving to my friends I booked it out of the library. Startling a couple of first years in the process.

If I could perfect these delayed spell-bombs, I could successfully store spells I would need when at the ministry and wouldn't have to risk getting expelled for the use of underage magic in an unnecessary circumstance.

Though if I were caught I would probably be thrown into Azkaban. I shook my head, thinking like that wouldn't help, I swore an oath to protect my sister and I couldn't protect her from the damn prophecy if I didn't even know what it said. This was extremely important, if I could figure out the proper sequence of runes to put on a container everything would be sorted and my months of planning would pay off.

Not even Snape, the git that he was, yelling at me as I ran past that I lost ten points for running in the halls could ruin my mood.

Things were looking up.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

I was sprawled out haphazardly in the grass; the chill of the night air biting into my skin was oddly pleasant as it distracted me from tonight's plans. I pulled out the struggling snitch that I usually kept in my robe pockets. Releasing it and letting it fly around when it was about a foot away from me, I would snatch it back quickly before starting all over. I continued this for a while; it was very distracting as my senses were focused on the capture of the sneaky gold ball.

My dad used to play with snitches like this, and I had learned at a young age to emulate it. My reflexes were excellent I knew that, and I made sure to keep them that way as I tended to play with my snitch during conversations in the common room or when I was relaxing outside like this.

It impressed some people and greatly annoyed others like Hermione or Draco when he would catch me doing it while I walked along Hogwarts grounds, usually with Daphne on my other arm. Though I believed the later was simply jealous because he couldn't do it.

I didn't really care though; I played with my snitch because it was a habit, a very amusing habit, because snitches were unpredictable, and would try anything to get away. Sometimes Nymphadora reminded me of a snitch.

Except she was too cunning for me to ever catch, but anytime I would begin to forget or find something to distract me she would flutter her pretty little wings and the flash of gold would ensnare my senses, and she would become my main focus again.

"You look just like your father used to, sprawled out and playing with a snitch, looking so confident in your abilities, with that unruly hair of yours looking like you just got off your broomstick. Though you are lacking the audience he usually performed for." She chuckled, "He used to be such an arrogant show-off."

I didn't bother to turn around when mum spoke; I knew she was coming out to join me. I could also tell she hadn't meant anything with her arrogant comment, she was just reminiscing about what an arse my father used to be. I had heard their stories; him and padfoot used to be real prats.

I grabbed the snitch one final time before putting the wriggling ball back into my pocket. I was silent waiting for my mum to speak again like I knew she would.

"I brought you some hot cocoa." I could hear the smile in her voice as she sat down beside me.

"Thanks." When she handed me the mug, I realized how cold my hands had been as the warmth traveled into my fingers, leaving a slight tingling sensation in its wake as it thawed my digits. "I was colder than I thought."

We lapsed into silence simply sitting beside each other, sharing body heat as our breaths puffed out in front of us making slight clouds in the air.

"Remus told me you mastered the Patronus charm right before break."

"Yeah"

"He told me it was a stag." In my peripheral vision I saw her glance at me, "said it looked exactly like your fathers animagus form." Since I knew she was watching me I simply nodded my head in response. From the way she was talking I could tell she knew something was off with me, and looking her in the eye could mean her figuring out I was up to something.

I took a drink of the hot cocoa feeling the rich velvety flavor of it glide smoothly down my throat, "This is really good mum." I murmured before taking another sip.

"Why didn't you tell me you had mastered that spell?" I remained silent; as much as I loved my mum our bond was too strong. If I kept up heavy conversation she would be able to tell I was nervous about something. I knew by remaining evasive she would still be suspicious but nothing could be confirmed. I had even been avoiding studying in her office with her at night since I had perfected my spell-bomb and all my plans had been hammered out. "That's really advanced magic sweetheart, you should be proud of that. There are plenty of adults who can't even do that spell."

"I am proud."

"Harry." My mum sighed, great confrontation time, maybe I should have given better answers. "What has been up with you lately? You've been acting odd since the end of summer." Her hand grabbed my knee as she continued, "It got better for awhile but this last month – I'm worried about you Harry."

Pangs of regret flittered through my stomach; I was hurting her I could tell by the tone of her voice. Looking over into her emerald eyes the concern there was almost my undoing, I could practically feel everything I had been suppressing the last five months come bursting out.

Steeling my resolve and squashing the regret I looked away, hopefully before she could read my emotions. "I'm fine." I mumbled, grabbing blades of frozen grass and ripping them from the ground before throwing them away from me. "There's nothing wrong." As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I realized that it was the wrong thing to say.

Quickly I decided to go with something that had been bugging me but wasn't the main thing, "I'm just confused about stuff with Daphne is all." My mum squeezed my knee, and I could have danced, she was buying it. I knew I could never outright lie to her she would catch me in it for sure but I could tell a half-truth and get away with it.

"Near the end of summer she told me she loved me, and I said it back without really thinking about it." I decided to leave out the shagging part of the story that was just a little too awkward for my tastes. "Things have been different between us ever since. I regretted what I said right after but its just not something you can take back you know? I feel awful about it because even though I've tried to love her I just can't make myself and in a week we will have been together for a year, and its just not what I want."

I sighed now that I was getting this out I realized how much it actually did frustrate me. Being away from Daphne and her tempting body and seeing Nymph really made me see how stupid I was being.

My mum was silent for a while as I sipped my cocoa. "Well from a girls perspective your being a right prat telling the girl you love her and knowing you didn't mean it and than still staying with her, and if I know anything about boys it was probably for the benefits of snogging." I couldn't help but blush at that, if only she knew.

"Your blushing tells me I was right about that – but at least I know I raised a decent son with a conscience if you feel bad about it. Merlin knows if it was Sirius or your father at that age they probably wouldn't have cared." We both laughed slightly at that.

"From a mothers perspective though." She whispered, tilting my chin up so I had to look her in the eye. "From a woman who just wants to see her kid happy I will say this. Harry you cant make yourself want something you don't, love can't be forced and when you feel it for someone you will know."

I closed my eyes before they could even begin to water, I did love someone she would just never see me that way.

"Sweetheart." I slowly opened my eyes to see my mum's face gazing at mine lovingly, "She'll realize how special you are someday. One day she'll see. Call it a mother's intuition, but I really think you were meant for one another. Just be patient, and be fair to Daphne, she's a sweet girl, end things with her before she gets even more attached." My eyes were widened with shock and disbelief with everything my mum was saying.

She was encouraging me to dump my girlfriend and try to win the affections of another woman. At least she didn't actually say who my heart really belonged to that could have been awkward.

My mum smiled slightly at my expression, "Plus how will Nymphadora ever come to terms with her affections for you, when you have another girl on your arm, she doesn't really seem like the type to get jealous – well in my opinion anyways."

My eyes were so wide, the cold air was biting, as I felt it drying them out, but I couldn't seem to blink due to shock. She knew my mum _knew_ how I felt about Nym. I groaned as the heat spread across my cheeks, how utterly embarrassing. I mean I remember the 'look' but now she had to say it out loud making everything worse.

My mum just laughed her long auburn hair blowing in the wind as she threw her head back, face full of mirth. A feeling of envy swam through me; I wish I could have suppressed all the things I had heard near the end of the summer like everyone else seemed able too. They acted as if nothing had ever happened.

"I'm not unobservant Harry."

"I wish you were." I muttered though in some odd way it was liberating to know at least one person knew about my feelings, and having her voice it meant I could talk to her about it later.

"It's a mother's job to be able to read her children." She replied as she stood up, "What do you say we head back inside, I'll make us another cup of cocoa. Maybe we can even get Ash and your father to join us, we do only have one more day after tonight before we need to go back to school."

I took the hand she offered, using it to pull myself up, "Sounds good mum." I smiled, "Sounds real good." I rubbed my stomach lightly as if in preparation for the hot beverage to settle there as she laughed at my antics. It would be nice to spend time with my family tonight, before going off. I could after all end up in Azkaban for pulling something like this.

My heart pounded as I stood in front of the fireplace staring into the flickering orange flames at two in the morning. The house was quiet, everyone was sound asleep, and no one would hear the floo when I departed so why wasn't I leaving?

I was scared out of my bloody mind; that's why!

When I had wrote this all out and gone through every eventuality it had seemed so much simpler, so much easier to accomplish, knowing I was one floo trip away from the ministry didn't seem like enough to get me to grab the floo powder.

I knew I was lucky; things could have been a lot more complicated if our floo wasn't connected directly to the Atrium at the Ministry, for dads work. _Dad_ I suddenly thought, _mum_ and_ Ash_. My family needed to be protected; even if they had forgotten I still remembered the tension that had been in the air after the World Cup, the looks of sorrow and defeat in my parents' faces still haunted me when I closed my eyes. And Ash, the possibility of my sister being the prophecy child was what finally made my hand reach out for the floo powder.

I would quickly get in and out, grab the prophecy, and leave. I could listen to it and no one would be the wiser. Quickly verifying my robe pockets making sure the six pre made spell-bombs I had made at school were their and my wand was in the pocket of my trousers.

Breathing in quickly, I stepped into the flames as I threw down the powder, 'Atrium, Ministry of Magic' I spoke clearly, as the rushing dizziness encompassed me and I was swept passed hundreds of grates.

When I felt myself being ejected from the floo network at the ministry I made sure to remain silent through the pain of landing on my knees. Listening intently for a moment I released the breath I had been holding when I fell.

The only sound in the Atrium was coming from the golden fountain that took up the centre of the large chamber, the water gushing from various points on the different figures as it spilled into the surrounding pool.

Raising my head slowly I prayed that the watchwizard who I knew sat at the desk situated slightly past the fountain hadn't noticed me yet. I wasn't sure how I was going to get passed him but I had brought a spell bomb that would silence my footsteps. Now would probably be the best time to use it.

I reached into a pocket on the right side of my robe where I placed the _silencio_ bomb. The reassuring weight of the glass sphere in my palm as I pulled it from my pocket, helped me believe that I could do this and things would be better after.

My final spell-bombs really were ingenious, when I go back to school, I would show them to Remus and maybe he could figure out how to get them noticed.

I looked at the object in my hand for a moment, studying it. I had transfigured a stone, into a glass sphere the size of a walnut and engraved four runes on it. I used an arithmetic equation to figure out the three key points on a sphere and than placed three _binding_ runes, so that the spell would stay inside. Than I engraved an _unraveling_ rune at the top of the sphere, all you had to do was place your thumb so it covered the whole unraveling rune and push some of your magic through your finger than throw the sphere in the air.

It was fairly simple to push your magic through the thumb, and no magic censor would be able to tell because the magic would just tickle your skin. As the sphere traveled through the air, the spell that I had placed inside after marking the object with _binding_ runes would be released and shot in the direction it was thrown.

The blue light of my _silencio_ swirled frantically in the glass wanting to be released, so I placed my thumb strategically and pushed some of my magic out throwing the sphere slightly in the air so that when it fell it would silence my steps. I felt the magic wash over me, and waited in tense silence for a few moments making sure no one had noticed me.

Silence.

I smiled, while pulling out my _stupefy_ sphere, after all I would need to incapacitate the watchwizard before he could send off an alarm. Scanning the Atrium again quickly I walked over to the shadows, and started slinking along, checking periodically to insure I was blending in.

My heart was pounding, in excitement and adrenaline, for some reason getting this far gave me confidence, and for the first time in months I actually felt like this was possible.

The man behind the desk where they weighed your wand at check in, had his head bent over, most likely working on some papers. His brown hair seemed about as unruly as mine, and his arms were very pale. I stopped to observe him for a moment as I began powering the sphere in my right hand. Several minutes passed and I could feel my face wrinkle in confusion.

He wasn't moving.

I crept slightly closer, was this a ploy or something, for him to be able to catch intruders better? Getting within ten feet of the man answered my question; he was asleep! I could have laughed, what kind of guard falls asleep on his watch?

I gripped my 'bomb' tighter; I wouldn't waste this on the guard if he were already out cold. Who knows I could need it for something later. Since I had already released my magic into it I couldn't let it go, so I just held onto it as I slipped by the front desk and proceeded to the lifts.

Right after passing the golden gates to the lifts I pressed the closest 'down' button. My sense of fear that had previously been forgotten came back ten fold as the clattering of the approaching lift echoed down the hall. My body tensed at the first noise, and I reflexively gripped the sphere harder if the watchwizard woke up I would have to stun him, and if he was just on the ground and not on the desk, it would look much worse.

The lift came into sight and the golden grilles slid apart with a great deal of clanking, much louder than the lift simply approaching. I dashed inside the lift as fast as possible and slammed my finger into the number nine button where I knew the Department of Mysteries was located.

As the lift shuddered and rattled as it moved I stood still, who _knew_ these lifts were so loud. I had a foreboding feeling that someone would be waiting for me as soon as the lift opened to take me into custody.

A cool female voice could be heard "Department of Mysteries" as the lift came to a halt and the grilles slid open. I stood frozen for a moment as I looked around.

No one was there.

I felt myself exhale in relief thank Merlin. Stepping out of the lift I surveyed the black corridor, it was dark down here, the only light coming from the flickering of the torches on the walls. There were two corridors you could travel, one ended with a plain black door, and the other seemed to have several doors and was much longer.

I had no real idea, which door led to the department, but looking at the odds, I was going with the single door. The other corridor probably led to the courtrooms that I knew where on this level.

I walked towards the plain black door, staying in the shadows because I felt more comfortable when the light wasn't illuminating my body. I paused right in front of the plain door, there was no knob, so how was I supposed to open this?

Cautiously I reached out my free hand to the door and pushed, sucking in a breath of air, all I could hear was the pounding of the blood in my veins.

Nothing happened.

I gritted my teeth in frustration, I guess my luck for the night was at an end. Luckily I had thought out the most likely scenarios; with my free hand I grabbed the _alohamora _spell-bomb from my pocket. 

I stepped back as I powered the rune and lightly tossed the sphere towards the door. I watched the clear spell release, and waited for the beautiful click of the door opening.

The silence stretched on, the only noise being the pounding of my heart. Now what was I supposed to do? The only other spell bombs I had were the _point-me_, _accio _(to summon the prophecy if I couldn't reach it), and _incarcerous_ (in case I needed to contain security to get away).

I gripped the small sphere with the swirling red tighter in my hand; all of this was for nothing if I couldn't get this bloody door open. I thought about using my wand, but if I channeled any magic through it the ministry would immediately sense underage magic, because of the stupid charms that were on our wands until we were of age.

Even if I wasn't caught right away, my magical signature would be everywhere, I groaned. "Damnit" What could I use to open a door.

If this door had a bloody knob, I could have used the pocket knife Sirius gave me for Christmas that had a key shaped metal that would open any door on it, but no the unspeakables had to be so bloody difficult. If I didn't admire them for whatever the hell they did I would curse their existence.

'Open, open, open.' I chanted in my head, what could I use to get this open, their had to be some way to open the door because people had to get in somehow. I thought about everything I had encountered, and any invention I had made looking for something that could help that wouldn't require a lot of magic.

_OPEN_!

That was it! Runes had solved my problem with the spell-bombs and they should get a lot more credit than wizards gave them. Everyone only seemed to want to study ancient runes and look at how they _used_ to be used, but they were hardly used anymore, only in illegal rituals and warding.

But they were still so useful, and I seemed to be the only wizard who noticed, even know-it-all Hermione looked at them as if they were something of the past, that couldn't be utilized in the present.

I pulled out my holy and phoenix feather wand, drawing the rune on the door wouldn't take enough magic to notify anybody, since it wasn't even a spell. But I knew from experience with using runes that just dragging my wand in the pattern of the rune and thinking about what I wanted would make it appear in red before fading so it simply marks the surface of the object.

Drawing a vertical line about four inches long, before drawing a two inch line horizontally through the middle of the line and than another two inch horizontal line only attached to my vertical line by the left side, I repeated _open _over and over in my mind.

With baited breath I watched as the red lines of my rune faded into the door, I chewed my lower lip in impatience. Nothing happened. I walked towards the door again to shove it in anger. EVERYTHING was for nothing now. I growled as I placed my hand on the stupid plain black door.

As soon as my hands made contact with the door there was a tingling sensation as the rune flashed red again, before the door swung silently open.

_Merlin._

It worked! If I weren't so afraid of getting caught I would have yelled in triumph, as it was a crooked grin simply plastered itself to my face as I walked over the threshold.

I was standing in a large circular room. Everything was black marble from the ceiling to the floors; identical, unmarked, handleless black doors were set at intervals all around the chamber. The only light in the room was from the shimmering light of cool blue flames coming from their torches evenly spaced between the doors.

The black marble shimmered from the blue fames, and it gave the impression that the marble was clear and dark churning water was underneath me. I shivered slightly this room was unnerving; the ghostly reflections of the flames were incredibly eerie.

There were about a dozen doors and I had no idea which one led to the hall of prophecies, the door behind me swung shut silently, I wouldn't have noticed except for the fact that the room became even eerier, and dark, making it incredibly difficult to see as the torchlit corridor behind me had been giving off most of the light.

Pulling out my _point-me_ sphere, which I quickly activated all the while thinking 'The Hall of Prophecies' as I released it into the air. The light blue spell shot towards the door directly across form me illuminating it slightly.

This was it. Striding purposefully across the chamber heading towards the door, I almost screamed when the great rumbling noise echoed through the room. The torches began to move sideways, as I froze. The circular wall was rotating.

The blue lines of the torches blurred into a constant stream of neon light along the center of the wall, as the wall spun faster than the eye could see, the only saving grace was that the floor remained stationary.

Suddenly the rumbling noise cut off as the wall came to a stop. The whole process had been fairly interesting if not completely random and pointless. Maybe it was a protection because I used the point me spell.

Most likely I would have continued to think that if I didn't notice a door to my left that still had a faint blue spot in the center of the door because of the spell I used. I couldn't help but chuckle slightly; I wouldn't have to waste time trying all the doors. Dashing to the door I suddenly froze again as the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end.

I was being watched.

I frantically searched the room but I could see nothing, that didn't necessarily mean anything though for someone could be under a disillusionment charm and I would have no idea. Heartbeat picking up speed, I realized my only option would be to go through the door in front of me and hope that the room spun and I had enough time to get the prophecy and get back out before whatever it was could catch me.

The stunning sphere was still in my right hand so if worse came to worse I could catch them off guard.

As I marched towards the jet-black door with the faint blue light at the center, I tried to be as silent as possible. My instincts were screaming at me, someone was watching me intently and I couldn't see them, if I weren't so determined I would have ran home. But I _needed _the prophecy first.

The door swung open just before I could reach it. Well wasn't that convenient. My heart beat frantically looking around the room; high as a church and full of nothing but towering shelves covered in small, dusty, glass orbs. They glimmered dully from the light issuing from the candle-brackets on the shelves, a cool blue. I was glad I was wearing a midnight black heavy robe - this room was chilly.

Edging forward slightly I peered down one of the shadowy aisles between two rows of shelves. How was I ever going to find this prophecy that there was only a chance was about my sister or I there was _thousands_ of glass orbs with little yellowing tags with something scribbled on them. I couldn't even come close to reaching half of them because they were so high up.

Furthermore I couldn't even see the end of the room, it was just row after row of shelves fading into the distance. I pulled out my _accio_ sphere, hopefully this would work, and it would certainly save me a lot of time and trouble.

Releasing the ball into the air I thought _accio prophecy_ as I stared as the ball dropped, glass shimmering into nothingness as the air shimmered signaling the clear spell was being released.

My heart pounded against my Adams apple as I waited in tense silence, the sound of my breathing my only companion.

Nothing happened.

I groaned in frustration, as I turned on my heel, I knew that would have been too simple for it to bloody work. At least it didn't backfire on me and _all_ the prophecies flew towards me - that would have been catastrophic.

I started down one of the long alleys of shelves, I wasn't quite sure what to look for but I did not want to look at every single yellow tag, that would take me years. I decided my best course of action was to simply look at all the orbs; maybe one would react to my presence or something.

One could only hope.

Some of the orbs had a weird liquid glow, while others were as dull and dark within as blown light bulbs; it started to become increasingly repetitive.

I had to have been walking through the rows of shelves for two hours, which probably meant it was getting closer to five o'clock in the morning. I would have to leave soon, people would start coming to the ministry for work and I needed to be gone before they got here.

My heartbeat had gone back to normal about an hour ago, the sound of blood pumping steadily through my veins no longer prominent in my ears. I still felt vaguely uncomfortable as if someone had been watching me the whole time, but it had dulled to the point where I didn't even care anymore.

I was bored and frustrated, and my palm was sweaty where it had been gripping the stunning sphere for the last several hours. Just before entering the next row I looked up at the blue-glowing candles protruding from the edge of the shelf, staring for a moment at the silver figure of ninety-seven.

Walking morosely down the row, I almost missed as one of the orbs glowed brightly for a moment just after I passed it. At first I thought my brain was playing tricks on me; I was extremely exhausted now that the adrenaline had left.

I slowly turned around, perking up slightly as I noticed one of the extremely dusty orbs was glowing slightly brighter than the rest and it looked like something was being written at the bottom of the yellowing tag.

Walking closer, to the orb, I vaguely realized that the silencing charm had worn off my feet. I stared intently at the orb; it was glowing with an inner light, though it looked as if no one had laid a hand on it in over a decade.

I craned my neck to read the yellowish label affixed to the dusty glass sphere. The third line on the tag looked like the ink was still shimmering slightly, as it was drying. I couldn't actually read the spidery writing for a moment, I was so afraid it would read my sisters name.

Which not only would that traumatize me knowing my sister had the weight of the world on her shoulders, it would also mean the loss of my life and magic as I had sworn to change fate to make sure I was the prophecy child. My eyes slowly focused on the thin scrawl.

_S.P.T. to A.P.W.B.D_

_Dark Lord _

_And (?) Harry James Potter._

I was – shocked. I wasn't quite sure how to feel. Starring at the spidery script for a few moments, and how my name glittered as though it had just been written, I realized that the prophecy child could have practically been anyone. The dull writing ended with a question mark.

I was relieved it wasn't Ash but I could have kicked myself. Looking at the script I came to the conclusion that there was a possibility that the prophecy child could have been a great number of people and there was a chance that it was neither Ash nor I, and I wouldn't of had to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders.

Somehow by deciding to come here tonight I had changed fate and now the weight of the wizarding world was going to be on my shoulders if the dark lord came back. The numb feeling that had all but faded wrapped around me with a vengeance.

The only comforting thought was at least my sister didn't have to face this. Though in hindsight I realized even if I was the prophecy child it would still rip apart my family, because one of us still had to bear the weight of the world.

I should have left everything damn well alone! It could have been another son or daughter from a different family. I could feel tears of frustration begin to sting my eyes. My choice tonight, had sentenced me, possibly to death.

With a shaking hand I reached out to grab the prophecy…I would listen to it when I got home. I expected it to feel cold, but the orb felt like it had been resting in the sun for years, the warmth traveled up into my arm from my palm as the inner glow inside the orb increased momentarily before the face of, _Merlin_, professor Trelawney, appeared in a swirling mist. I whipped the dust of the orb so I could see her face better.

Her deep raspy voice cut through the silence in the room. "_The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches … born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies … and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not … and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives … the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies …"_

The slowly revolving face of professor Trelawney faded back into the swirling mist. The silence around me was absolute. Even though I knew it would be something like this I still felt the pressure of the walls around me closing in, I was finding it very difficult to breath.

The sound of clapping behind me startled me so terribly that the orb and my glass sphere were thrown from my hands as I whirled around. The silvery cloaked figure I was know facing easily side stepped the _stupefy_ that shot at him, as the prophecy smashed at his feet, a swirling mist erupting from it as Trelawney's voice sounded yet again, "_The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches _…" before fading into nothingness.

The man stood tall, probably 6'3, and his silver cloak completely covered his broad frame, his silver hood casting his face into darkness so I couldn't discern any other distinguishable features.

His frame shook slightly as he chuckled, his haughty attitude was enraging me, I mean yes what I was doing was illegal but did he have to laugh. He continued clapping slowly, as if he were mocking me, making me completely forget the numb feeling and the fear that I felt for being caught.

I reached into my pocket for my final sphere, I would have to use it wisely and than book it out of here and floo home. That seemed to be the only viable option.

"Don't even think about reaching for your wand boy." A deep baritone voice intoned from beneath the hood of the cloak. "Actually drop it so I can see it." I would have smirked, because at this moment my wand wasn't what I needed but I kept my face impassive.

I felt extremely defiant there was something about this hooded figure that irked me. I slowly dropped my wand as I placed my hand back in my pocket feigning nonchalance, while secretly activating my sphere.

I had to release it at the perfect moment or I was surely done for. Any tiredness I had been feeling was banished from my body as adrenaline surged through me.

The figure laughed a deep rumbling sound, "Harry Potter you are incredibly daft." Hell he knew my name, I was done for, well I refused to go down without a fight. "_Never_ drop your wand for an unknown figure."

Defiance surged through me, he thought I was a moron, I'd show him. Honing in on my seeker reflexes I whipped the sphere out of my pocket and threw it with all the force I could muster, ropes shot from the sphere as it dissolved to wrap around the figure.

Not taking a moment to bask in my triumph I bent swiftly to grab my wand before running as fast as possible past the shocked and incarcerated figure.

As the door that was still slightly ajar came nearer I allowed myself to smile, I was almost home free. Suddenly I felt a pressure at my back as my arms and legs went rigid slamming themselves tightly to my torso as I fell mid stride face first to the stone floor.

The sharp pain that I felt in my nose as I landed made me feel positive that it was broken. Panic swarmed my mind; I was a goner.

"_Never_ underestimate an opponent, or turn your back on them unless there is no possible way they can come after you." This stupid man was mocking me again, couldn't he at least pretend I put up a valiant effort; he didn't need to bruise my pride so much. Anyways who the _hell_ was he to give me fighting advice.

I heard the rustling of his cloak as he squatted beside me, before he flipped me over so I was facing towards the ceiling. I could feel the blood gushing from my nose as the tangy fluid dripped into my mouth. It tasted like rust and salt, very coppery.

I tried in vain to stop the prickling sensation behind my eyes, I refused to cry in front of this man, but the pain in my nose was _searing_. The man must have seen the anger and defiance in my eyes, for he started talking again.

"Breaking into the department of mysteries." He drawled, as he rocked on his heels slightly. He didn't continue talking and I was glad, he was putting me on edge, and I couldn't think straight with the pain radiating in my face to my head. My vision was blurring with tears and pain, and if he didn't take this spell of me soon I would probably choke on the blood pooling in my mouth.

"Hmmm." Why was he just staring at me? Seriously I wanted him to take me in right now, because than someone would fix my nose. I couldn't figure this guy out, what was he playing at? "Boy, I will release your body from the spell." He _would_, the pain would get worse if he took my body out of its frozen state, he seemed to know that too for he continued, "maybe I should heal your nose first."

I would have flinched if it were at all possible when he whipped his wand out and pointed it at my face, he didn't speak but I felt the movement in the air as he cast a spell. The pressure and pain evaporated, as my nose mended, thank Merlin!

"Do not even attempt to move when I release you. I will have you down so fast you'll only twitch."

As soon as I felt my body relax, I swallowed the pool of blood in my throat and lifted my arm to wipe the blood from my face. I felt blood smear across the lower half of my face, only half of it transferring to my sleeve; at least it wasn't dripping anymore. Well he didn't attack me and I did move, maybe I could try to curse him.

"Now that I have so graciously let you clean your face." I wanted to growl at him, he was belittling me, with his stupid sarcastic drawl; instead I only narrowed my eyes. "Look if your going to be childish about this we don't need to have this conversation." Honestly I wasn't quite sure how to respond to that, I wasn't being childish – was I?

"I don't enjoy pointless conversations so I will get right to the point, you Harry James Potter, broke into my department." He was an _unspeakable_, my eyes widened, I should have figured that out before. Despite the severity of the situation, I could feel questions bubble in my chest, dying to be asked. "I want to know, what you did to my outer door, it is supposed to be impenetrable." He muttered the last part, but I still heard him.

I was just about to answer when he cut me off as soon as I opened my mouth, "I have watched you the entire time." So he was the reason I had felt like I was being watched. I suddenly felt very stupid; I should have paid more attention to my instincts in the first place. I also suddenly felt angry, he _let_ me wander around the department, and it had nothing to do with me.

My heart plummeted to the pit of my stomach.

"But I do believe the most pressing matter we need to discuss is how did you remove that prophecy from the shelf." I felt my face furrow in confusion, out of everything that was the most important thing he had to discuss with me? Well fine.

"I put my hand on it, and picked it up." Making sure my tone was laced with sarcasm, out of all the things I did, that seemed the stupidest question to ask.

"I realize that. I mean what did you do, that should have been impossible." Frustration was the dominant emotion in his voice, but I could hear faint curiosity as well.

"Nothing." I growled, "I did absolutely nothing to it." I could feel his disbelieving stare on me and it frustrated me, I knew after this I would never get to be an unspeakable anyways, might as well mock him, I smirked. "See you see." I drawled, attempting to imitate his earlier tone, "It had my name on it so I simply picked it up - obviously it was mine."

I expected an immediate response, but he simply squatted, completely immobile, as if I had cursed him. Honestly I could somewhat understand his plight, if he had been watching me than he would have heard the prophecy too. Maybe he would think twice about throwing me in Azkaban now, considering everything.

"Why were you clapping earlier." The silence had been getting to me, and I did want to know.

He did nothing.

I thought about getting up and just walking away, but he would probably notice that. I had no idea what was wrong with him, he shouldn't be the one freaking out about the prophecy, the world wasn't on _his_ shoulders.

My fears that had been brushed aside to deal with this mystery man, came back ten fold. The world suddenly felt impossibly large, and I felt incredibly small.

Suddenly two strong arms grabbed me by the shoulders, the pressure uncomfortably tight. "Why did you come here tonight?" His voice was rushed; panicked almost, not at all like I had heard it before; he wasn't mocking me anymore.

"I – I ne – ne – need – ed to." I stopped for a moment, I was stuttering, his grip was painful, and I suddenly felt all the power in this man; I was terrified. He shook me when I stopped, so I attempted to control my voice. "I needed to hear that prophecy, I heard my parents talk about it five months ago but i didn't know the whole thing. There was a chance it could have been my sister; I needed to protect her from it. I was looking for the prophecy tonight, I just needed to hear it." My voice shook something terrible the whole time I spoke.

His grip loosened slightly. Silence stretched between us, I was afraid to speak, and he seemed to be thinking. Our breathing, and the sound of my heart in my throat the only sounds in the hall of prophesies. The flickering of the flames on the wall, were casting odd shadows on the stone floor.

"Harry James Potter." His voice sounded, cold and cool, devoid of all emotion, "Son of James and Lily Potter, godson of one Sirius Black, eldest brother to Aisling Potter. Boyfriend of one Daphne Greengrass, pureblood from Slytherin, best friend of Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger. Youngest seeker in a century, fourth year Gryffindor at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry, top in all of your classes save potions, incredibly sociable. In your free time, you attempt to make new spells and from what I have seen tonight have succeeded in making your own creations."

With every word he spoke in that detached voice I could feel my eyes widen, I wasn't important, how the hell did he know so much about me? This was incredibly creepy; I didn't even know how to react when he hesitated.

"What would you do, heir to the Potter line, for the ones you loved?"

"Anything." I choked out, it was true, I was _here_ wasn't I?

"Ahh." He breathed, the smile in his voice audible, "I was so hoping you would say that."

**AN – so I hope the two time jumps I had in this chapter weren't to confusing. I didn't have enough material here to make 3 short chapters so I put them all together. **

**This is also the last of my 'setup' chapters! If you have any questions or concerns, let me know, and review please! I love hearing your thoughts and I want to make sure you guys are enjoying this story and its making sense to you. I mean the only reason I am posting this is for your enjoyment!**


	4. Towards the future

**DISCLAIMER - NOT MINE! ALL J.K ROWLINGS!**

**AN- Thank you all for your reviews!! **

**ALSO FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO FOUND THE TIME JUMPS IN THE LAST CHAPTER HARD THERE IS NO MOREEVERYTHING FLOWS FROM THIS POINT ON.**

**TONKS POV JUST SO YOU KNOW**

I should have beenexcited.

I wasn't.

Three years of exhausting effort, staying up for hours slaving over essays, aching joints from training, and now I was finally finished. I would be starting my dream job a week after I accepted my diploma today. So why did I feel so empty?

I had almost failed out of the program, due to the fact I was absolute rubbish at stealth and tracking. My clumsy nature always getting in the way. I knew this was a huge accomplishment; over half of the trainees I had started the program with had flunked out. Mad-eye Moody had driven most to tears, with his grueling and sometimes abusive teaching methods, always growling 'Constant Vigilance!'

Moody couldn't force my tears, my body was spent, and it would be impossible for any more tears to fall. I had cried enough over the last two and a half years for a lifetime. It seemed as though any other trial or tribulation I was faced with was inconsequential when stacked next to him.

Harry should have been in the audience today, somehow I know he would have been clapping the loudest, smiling the biggest crooked grin in the crowd, I knew I would hear his cheers over the din of the others in attendance.

He had always been my rock. Even when I brushed him aside for that months fancy, or when I missed his birthday, even when I forgot to get him a Christmas present, he had always been there. Waiting with open arms to heal my wounds, wrapping me in his warmth, he may have been younger than me, but he was always so much stronger.

Life was like a churning, raging storm with the ocean as its backdrop, and everyone constantly fought to stay afloat, battling the vicious currents and waves that made up the obstacles thrown at them. Harry had been my solace, the rock I grabbed onto when I was in danger of being swept away. I could climb onto my rock; the water never could reach me there.

Now though … I constantly felt like I was drowning.

He had always protected me from the harsh truth of men who cared only for superficial things, like how someone looked. He always believed in me, even when I forgot to believe in myself.

He should have been here today.

I gazed unseeingly at the scarlet velveteen curtains to my right, my future would truly start with this diploma, and o and how bleak it looked. I was one for colors and life and fun, I thrived under the sun.

But the sun had been covered with dark, dreary, and depressing clouds, occasionally rays would slip through, and I would revel in happiness, if only for a moment.

The last three months had been especially difficult.

Amelia Bones had finally confronted James Potter, who had exhausted Auror resources for over two years, forcing him to close the case, and in effect end the searches for his son. A giant red unsolved now shimmered on the top of Harry James Potter's file.

The masses let him sift through their fingers like a grain of sand, unimportant, minuscule and irrelevant. They brushed it off once the speculation in the papers died down. People were more concerned with the latest scandalous affair than the disappearance of a fourteen-year-old schoolboy.

It seemed that in officially closing the case file James as well as The Weasleys, The Blacks, Lupin, and Pettigrew had conceded defeat.

Lily, Ash and I were the only ones left who believed he was still alive and that one-day he would be found. Of course the others still missed him intensely but they were no longer hoping, no longer believing.

I couldn't blame them even though I wanted to. Hoping was taxing, draining, and utterly disappointing.

At least they were better than the blasted Gryffindors at Hogwarts, they too still mourned him, only because without their star seeker they had been unable to win the quidditch or house cup, poor Ginny Weasley, she had such massive shoes to fill.

I loathed them.

They mourned the loss of a player, their precious Golden Boy, I mourned the boy; man he could have been.

"Tonks, Nymphadora." I heard my name in the distance, but I was far away from the woman standing at the center of the white marble dais behind the golden podium, I was staring into the bright emerald green eyes of the man he would have been, eyes full of promises only he could keep, as he wrapped his arms around me. I was whole, content, and truly happy for the first time in years. I didn't want to leave his embrace.

An incessant jabbing in my lower back from the graduate behind me, snapped me out of my thoughts, "Love, its your turn." Clarissa Travers hissed, I flinched slightly at the use of that endearment; he used to say that to me all the time.

"I told you not to call me love!" I snapped back at one of the few friends I had made in training, as my hair flashed red. She didn't even acknowledge my remark. Her light brown eyebrows narrowed in exasperation, as she shoved me harder, urging me up the steps, and towards my future.

I walked across the marble stage slowly staring intently at my feet, I would not trip, I heard them applauding, but I didn't dare look into the audience, it would be worse to actually see the empty seat.

I shook hands with the director of magical law enforcement, Amelia Bones as she congratulated me and welcomed me to the force. She spoke to the crowd about what an asset I would be, and gave highlights of my finer moments in training, as I stared at the scroll in my hand.

The pristine ivy parchment was rolled tightly creating a perfectly symmetrical tube. A royal blue satin ribbon was tied in an immaculate bow around the center, holding it in place. I fingered the ribbon gently as I listened to Madame Bones speaking, standing beside her as we were told to do before she called the next name; this was the exact shade my work robes would be. I had been dying to wear this shade since I was a little girl.

I still felt empty.

The scroll in my right hand didn't change anything. "Travers, Clarissa." Was finally spoken so I swiftly crossed the rest of the stage. Just as I was reaching the next set of velvet curtains I tripped, I clenched my eyes tightly in fear, there was a set of narrow stairs and I was going to fall down all of them.

Instead of plummeting, most likely to a lengthy stay in St Mungos, I fell into a firm chest.

"Whoa there pretty lady, watch your step." A slightly familiar voice chuckled. I opened my eyes, to stare at emerald green robes, I could tell by looking at the chest, this guy worked out. The material of his garment was stretched over his chest and broad shoulders.

I frowned slightly, where had I heard that voice before? Without encouragement on my part, my heart started pounding, I was sure it was audible. I knew that voice, could it be his sounding deeper because he matured over the years. Would he just show up like this?

Slowly, hesitantly I turned my head upwards, only to catch a glimpse of shoulder length wavy jet black hair. The world narrowed to him, everything around me blurred, he was back, strolling back into my life like nothing happened, I would have been angry, if I wasn't encompassed by a feeling of delirious cheer.

"Harry." I whispered reverently, before I flung my arms around him, placing butterfly kisses all over the left side of his face. Slowly I noticed he smelled wrong.

He smelled like the woods, dirt and tree bark, that wasn't right. He smelled of soap and fresh air; always had even when he was just a boy.

I pulled back slowly, unwrapping my legs from his waist, when had I even wrapped them around him?

"I don't know who Harry is but he sure is one lucky bloke."

I finally looked at 'Harry', really looked at him. He had the height I would assume Harry to have by now, but his face was wrong, too narrow, his jaw too sharp, cheekbones too rounded, no glasses, and his eyes were blue.

I stepped away from him as if I had been slapped, this wasn't Harry, I clutched my heart, I could feel it breaking, my knees felt weak, the world went blurry as I swayed on my feet. This was why hoping was dangerous. I was a bloody fool.

How could I have been so daft, Harry wouldn't stroll up unannounced he was missing, assumed dead, I felt sobs rise within me.

"Tonks are you okay." His voice sounded so faraway, "Its me Evan." I felt someone grab my arm tightly, but I couldn't focus, it wasn't him. "Evan corner, you remember me right?"

His name snapped me out of my daze momentarily. Evan Corner. Evan Corner, Harry had comforted me over that break up, it had been my last school relationship. The sobs ripped from my throat, he would never comfort me again.

I wrapped my arms tightly around my midsection, as if to hold myself together so my corporeal body wouldn't be torn apart like my insides, as I ran clumsily away from Evan. My vision was blurry, everything was a blur of different colors, I heard my name being called as I ran down the steps and through the throng of people gathered to watch our 'graduation'.

The hole in my chest that I had suppressed over time had ripped open the moment I had let my hopes get away from me. I vaguely noticed I wasn't gripping my diploma anymore as I reached the apparation dock.

I was incapable of breathing as the sensation of being squeezed through a tube that was way too small engulfed me for a moment, before suddenly disappearing, I took a second to asses the feel of my body. Being a metamorphagus I was very in tune with myself, and I needed to make sure I wasn't splinched.

Feeling no oddity or inconsistency I stared for a moment at the large three story manor home, it looked opulent, affluent, and prosperous, with its two white sandstone pillars framing the large double doors. The brilliancy of the ivory painted manor as it sparkled in the sunlight, was captivating.

But for all its lavishness, it did not hold a feeling of emptiness like most manors; the flower gardens beneath the first floor windows and that framed a cobblestone walkway towards the front doors, showed evident signs of love.

The freesia, honeysuckle, violets, bluebells, lilies, and roses, combined to create an intricate array of colors as their petals swayed gently in the summers breeze. They were flourishing, blossoming, thriving under the care of someone who obviously loved them.

The manor looked inviting, there was a definite feeling of welcome in the air. Even though it was large and I knew the grounds were massive, they did contain a Quidditch pitch, the estate seemed homey.

I followed the cobblestone pathway to the front door as quickly as I could, stumbling the whole way; I had a sudden need to feel him. Ignoring the griffin head knocker, I opened the door, kicking my shoes off in the foyer.

The Potters wouldn't mind.

Over the last few years I had taken to showing up randomly, unannounced, and at all hours, needing to feel close to him. Eventually they had simply allowed me into the wards permanently, plus I was supposed to come over later tonight anyways.

My relationship with the Potters was…different. I had known them since I was eight years old and they had first come out of hiding, and until I was sixteen had seen all of them several times a year.

With Harry disappearing, whether he was kidnapped or had run away, I had spent most of my free time with them. Lily had been invaluable, she seemed to understand why I needed to sit in his room basking in his presence, and she never said anything about it.

They were all wonderful and kind people, though we didn't speak much. Sometimes when I stayed late I would join them for dinner before going home and James and Lily would ask me questions about how things were going, but it was never more than small talk.

We weren't close in the traditional sense of the word, but the loss of Harry had bonded us in some indistinct way. I felt a certain affinity with them that I couldn't find elsewhere.

The state the Potter family was in was heart wrenching. James and Lily still loved each other passionately, so passionately in fact that if they were simply looking into the others eyes and you happened upon them, you felt as if you were intruding on a private moment the air around them was so charged, but a certain rift had developed recently.

James had given up on ever finding Harry, while Lily still ferociously believed that he was out there, waiting for her. But besides the recently developed rift they both always looked so heartbroken, so haunted, so defeated.

James had nearly lost his job, and Lily, one of the best teachers at Hogwarts, was now about as lively in her lessons as professor Binns. Both of them seemed to cling to Ash as if the world would crumble around her, and they doted on her constantly, not that she even seemed to notice the latter.

The previous fun-loving, adventure seeking, outgoing socialite had become quiet and somewhat of a recluse. The only people she ever actually _talked_ to were her parents and Ginny, other than them she only spoke when spoken too - that I saw anyway.

Without her brother, she seemed lost.

My pondering ended abruptly as I realized my feet had carried me to his room; I stared at the closed oak door. As always my smile twitched slightly when I saw the flashing yellow sign that covered a quarter of the door, _beware of the basilisk_, the colors of the letters changing from green to black.

I had bought it for him for Christmas in his second year, for some reason he had become obsessed with the creatures, god knows why. When I asked him about it once he had stared at me as if I was completely nutters for a moment before answering, "If you look them directly in the eye – you die instantly. I think that's wicked! To have eyes so intense, merely a look from you would smite your enemies."

I remember staring at him for a long time in disbelief, before I had burst out laughing. Through my laughter I told him it was ironic he would like a basilisk for its eyes when I knew he would grow up to be a heartbreaker because of his penetrating, dazzling eyes, that captured you when you spoke to him.

He had brushed off my statement, but when I gave him the sign for Christmas we had shared a look before laughing, confusing everyone else around us. By the end of the year he outgrew his obsession, but he had kept the sign on his door, promising me he would never remove it.

The smile faded when I thought about how much I missed his laughter, sighing I grasped the knob on the door, which swung open silently.

His room was exactly the same as the night he had disappeared. His desk was littered with parchments, quills and inkpots, his school trunk sat beside his desk opened slightly with his school robes hanging out, the door to his wardrobe was ajar, and their was a pile of clothes at the foot of his bed. Hedwig's perch was empty; she had flown away six months after he disappeared and never came home.

The enchanted night sky twinkled above me as I stepped over the doorsill and fully entered his chamber. Nothing was even remotely dusty, I knew Lily magicked away the dust any time it started gathering, though she refused to actually clean or move anything, let alone let someone else do it.

When I had asked her once why she didn't at least clean the pile of clothes she hadn't even turned to look at me simply replying, "Harry's only chore besides helping with dishes is doing his own laundry… He will do it when he comes home." I remember how my heart had cracked…the way she had said it. It was as if he had simply gone over to a friend's house and would come home for dinner.

Unreservedly heartbreaking.

I gazed briefly at the wall of moving photos, you could tell what he loved, looking at that wall, Quidditch, friends, and his family. I would have lingered staring at his happy smiling face but I needed something tangible, I needed to feel him, I lay down on his bed.

The plush golden comforter embraced me intimately, as the bed rocked and rippled beneath me. I closed my eyes in rapture as the scent of soap and fresh air wrapped around me, I had no idea how someone could actually smell of fresh air, but Harry managed it, probably because he practically lived in the air.

His scent after all this time still lingered, it had faded, but it was still there. With my eyes closed and the blanket caressing my back and sides I could almost feel him.

"Harry." I whispered brokenly as I felt any resolve crack, tears welling in my eyes before slipping through the cracks of my eyelids and dripping down my face. I moved to bury my face into the pillow, making the scent increase slightly, as the silk pillow practically stroked my skin.

Hindsight was incredibly cruel.

Thinking of all the time with him I had wasted the last two years he was still with us. Constantly pushing him away, because I had been unable to deal with my feelings or even truly recognize them, only dating men who had some element of Harry, before realizing none could compare.

Trying to kindle a fire for another man that would never burn, because my heart burned for only one, I hadn't even truly realized just how _much_ he meant to me until he was gone. I still thought it was wrong for me to have fancied a twelve year old when I was sixteen, but I didn't care anymore.

It didn't matter that he would never love me; he loved Daphne, I knew that but didn't care. I needed him, even if we were simply destined to be friends, I would give anything to even see him again, to have him hold me one last time.

Seeing him would be enough.

"You're here early." I jerked my tearstained face from the silk of the pillow, staring momentarily at the pool of salty tears before raising my streaked face towards the door.

Ash stood in the doorway, her lightly curled deep red hair framing her beautiful face, she had her mother's delicate facial features with her fathers nose. She had grown so much over the last couple of years.

If she paid attention to them I knew she could have had almost any guy in Hogwarts, she was the embodiment of beauty, their entire family was good-looking, it was unjust to be so blessed. Her hazel eyes looked slowly around her brothers' room, lingering on his wall of posters.

He had tons of quidditch posters with their players posing or zooming around, but plastered all over the wall, interspersed randomly were over a hundred pictures of him with his friends and family.

I wiped the tears from my face, grimacing when I realized that some of the tracks had dried, I would need to wash my face. "Yeah I know…I wanted to spend some time up here before the meeting."

She nodded turning her head away from the pictures to shoot me a look of understanding. She knew I received my diploma today, and her look told me she knew how hard it was for me to realize he wouldn't be there.

"I think if he could've gone, he would have been there." Her voice was dull, hollow almost, but I understood.

I watched as she stopped in front of a section of pictures, fingering them slightly. I knew she couldn't remove them; there was a permanent sticking charm on all of the photos. I remained silent as I watched her not entirely sure of how to proceed, we had never been in his room together or even really talked about anything in a long time.

Her slight frame shook faintly, before she composed herself, still staring at the same grouping of five pictures.

"These are my five favorite memories of him." She spoke quietly, just barely loud enough for me to hear her. I sat up slightly on the bed, moving so my legs hung over the side. "He knew that, so when he got mum to make copies of the prints he stuck them all together on this wall … Us after a snowball fight we staged on our brooms when I was twelve … a picture of us sleeping together one night after I had a nightmare … him trying to braid my hair one day when I was ten, because some muggle girl at the park made fun of my hair … him having a tea party with me when I was seven because Ginny was sick and couldn't come over … and my favorite, the day we made our parents take us to this fountain they went to right after they graduated. It was the day after he turned fourteen, and our parents have a picture on the mantle of them dancing in front of this fountain, I had thought it was beautiful and for some reason had a sudden urge to actually see it. We waited until dad got home from work before we all went. It took us almost all evening to try and coordinate our dancing, Harry's just no good at it. Eventually it started to get dark, and than it started pouring, I wanted to give up, saying we couldn't recreate it, but he wouldn't let me. He told me sternly, "Potter's we never quit", after another hour, both of us were soaked, and he finally got it right, so we started over so my parents could take a picture. Well when the camera flashed I screwed up falling into him and knocking us both into the fountain. We decided our version was better."

She smiled sadly as she fingered each one of the photographs reverently, before sighing and turning towards me. The tears that I had subdued when she first entered the room, I noticed, where gliding down my face; she looked so lost.

I didn't know what to say, so I simply stared at her. She didn't cry, as she stared at me sitting on his bed, she never talked this much anymore. I was almost afraid that if I spoke I would ruin whatever mind frame she was in.

Usually she only answered direct questions, unless it was Ginny or her parents. Even though I came over a lot we had never really talked about Harry.

"He'll be back one day you know." She whispered clenching her fists and closing her eyes as if she expected me to tell her he wasn't, she looked like she was preparing for a blow.

"I know."

Her eyes snapped wide open and she looked intently into my face, seemingly checking if I was being honest. I knew the honesty and belief was shining in my eyes, so I simply stared back. Even though hoping hurt like hell, I couldn't give up.

"Do you feel it too?" She asked.

My head cocked left in confusion, "Feel what?" I asked slowly.

"His pain." She whispered. "It hurts him so much, being away from us, but he thinks he has too, he thinks he's protecting us." Her voice started getting louder as she approached me slowly, sitting beside me and gripping my hand. Hers felt like ice, I tried not to flinch.

How could she even know what he was feeling? The way she spoke, it was like she was tuning into him or something, but that was impossible. I tried to hide the disbelief I felt at what she was saying. I knew she missed her brother, but was she going delusional with his prolonged absence? Hoping so much for something it almost became real?

I knew she felt lost without him; I did too, but seriously?

"You don't believe me." She dropped my hand like I had scorched her. I looked in astonishment at her.

"Ash that's not it-"

"Yeah it is." I could hear the hurt in her voice, I realized she had probably kept pretty quiet about this, and I was being a prat, I should have just nodded my agreement, when she spoke. Or at least _tried_ to believe her, "Ginny didn't believe me either." I was right; she was probably coming to me, as an older sister of sorts, for someone to confide in.

"I thought _you_ of all people would have understood … maybe even felt it." The way she had said you, cut me, it was as if she expected that Harry and I had had some special bond and I had somehow failed him. "He's practically projecting it."

"Ash."

She whipped around, anger blazing in her hazel orbs, "Don't you dare say I can't feel his emotions!" She hissed, practically spitting she was so angry. She looked like a feral lion, defending her pride. "He hurts! He's lying so much, doing things he doesn't want too, he's a prisoner but he put himself there, I just don't understand _why_ or _where_!"

Her voice broke, as her body suddenly gave out, crumpling to the floor shaking with sobs. "I just don't understand Tonks." I didn't either. How do you comfort someone when you're breaking from the same pain? "He's alive. Why wont he just come home?"

"Ash, we don't know anything for sure."

"I know he's alive!" She shouted, "I would feel it if he were gone!"

I slid off of the king sized bed and crawled across the hardwood to the distressed girl in front of me. Slowly I wrapped my arms around her pulling her onto my lap, as I begun to rock us gently. Harry used to calm me by holding me this way. I had never been the comforting type, I usually joked, making light of things made them easier.

I could think of no possible way to make this easier. Thinking of something to say that would offer the maximum amount of comfort, while being reassuring, but not sounding like I was mocking or placating her was much more difficult than one would have thought.

How had Harry gone around being the shoulder to cry on. I suddenly appreciated everything he had done just a little bit more, it must have been incredibly taxing, being the rock for everyone else. Who had he leaned on?

The more I thought on it the more I realized I couldn't really think of anyone that Harry truly leaned on, he told people things sure, his mum especially, but he tended to shoulder everything himself, like some masochistic hero. Thinking everything was his responsibility, and taking others burdens to add to his own load.

I wondered if he enjoyed placing the weight of the world on his shoulders.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

"It feels…like it did before." Sirius Black's sigh cut through the dinning room in a way that the previous yelling hadn't.

Dumbledore had reconstituted the Order of the Phoenix he had formed during the first war with you-know-who, this was only the second meeting, and already no one could agree on anything. The crux of the problem was ten of the twenty-six members still didn't really believe that he-who-must-not-be-named had returned.

Dumbledore simply sat at the Potters severely enlarged dinning room table, watching everyone argue, watching as well placated me.

Senior Auror Kingsley Shacklebolt and I had been talking after the appearance of the first Dark Mark over a muggle museum two months ago. I had told him that it was different from when the mark had appeared at the World Cup, and the ministry shouldn't be brushing it off like they had before, there was something different this time, more foreboding, sinister almost.

He readily agreed and asked to speak with me after training. When we met at the Leaky Cauldron, he asked if I wanted to make a difference, put up a front if you-know-who was really back, I readily agreed.

Two weeks later the first meeting had been held, after the second Dark Mark had appeared this time over a non-descript cottage in Little Hangleton. There had been no one in residence, but the house was thoroughly decimated, no one knew if anything had even been stolen, it was impossible to tell.

After that the disappearances started, so far three ministry officials had completely vanished, without a trace, one of our own a woman named Emmeline Vance, had disappeared just last week.

The disappearances disturbed me more than the Dark Mark illuminating the sky, though that was most likely because they all seemed so similar to the way Harry had gone. In the middle of the night, stolen from their beds.

"Sirius how can you say such a thing?" whispered Hestia Jones, one of our number still in denial.

"Its_ true_ that's how!" He shouted his goatee and mustache quivering slightly in frustration as he slammed his fists on the table, his face stern and rigid. There was absolutely no sign of the jokester I knew he was. "Jones how can you deny it! How can any of you." He yelled gazing intently into everyone's faces.

"Aye." The massive form of Rubeus Hagrid rumbled, "it's changing out there, just like last time…there's a storm coming – an' we best be ready when she does."

Hagrid was right, how could any of us deny the truth, we were here because we believed he had returned, and refused to side with the ministry in brushing off two dark marks appearing within a month and the disappearances of three ministry officials directly after.

I bit my nails, focusing solely on my hands, to avoid opening my mouth and lashing out at the ten fools sitting at this table. If they didn't believe they shouldn't be here. I had no patience to listen to squabbling today, I had graduated, had my hopes crushed, and comforted a distraught fifteen year old girl for two hours, before this meeting, I was emotionally drained.

And they were incredibly daft.

"Its just some hooligans." Mundungus Fletcher slurred drunkenly, who comes to something like this sloshed out of their mind, he was disgusting. He was standing behind me against the wall eyeing one of the Potters ornately framed paintings like it was his ticket to riches, and I could smell him as if he were directly under my nose. The pungent odor of filth and alcohol; it was delightful.

My eyes rolled as I scoffed at the thought.

"You got something to say Nymphadora." He garbled.

My hair flashed red in annoyance, I_ loathed_ my name, "Yes I do! Call me Nymphadora again and I will hex you till your bodily functions give out." I retorted angrily whipping around, knocking my chair over in the process, and brandishing my wand at 'dung's face.

"Sit down child." Growled Mad-Eye his shocking blue magical eye whizzing around in his skull. I desperately wanted to hex somebody, and briefly I even considered turning on Moody, though that would be like signing a death wish. "Albus, this is getting us nowhere – tell them why you called a meeting."

My stomach sank as I slowly lowered my body back into my chair; all thoughts of hexing flew out of my head. Moody looked distraught about something, and it took a lot to shake the old auror.

"Alastor I was simply waiting for the arrival of Severus, before commencing." The Headmaster twined his fingers together, the twinkle in his blue orbs notably absent.

"Bloody Snivellus." Sirius muttered, only to be whacked by his wife.

"Severus knows already Albus, he was there."

"Probably did it himself." Sirius interrupted mumbling again, only to be whacked upside the head again the slap resounding in the room much louder than the first time, "Ouch, quit that woman!" He yelped, though he smiled slightly at Alexa showing he was not angry.

James and Remus snickered quietly at their friends' abuse. I looked over to Peter the fourth leg of their quartet wondering why his snicker was not audible. The short squat mousy haired man, was staring at his fingers intently, fidgeting, and looking incredibly anxious. What was wrong with him?

Dumbledore was seemingly ignoring Sirius comment as he sighed closing his eyes for a moment, before straightening in his chair at the head of the table and surveying all of us for a moment.

"Alas, the dark mark appeared over Hogwarts grounds at four am this morning."

A series of gasps and exclamations were heard around the table, I couldn't listen, Hogwarts. I was flabbergasted, how had you-know-who breeched the wards undetected, Hogwarts was a stronghold and everyone knew she would stand strong and proud against the evil self proclaimed lord.

At least that was the general consensus before.

"What happened professor?" The Weasley twins asked in unison, their freckled faces ashen, the identical devious smirks missing. Mentally shaking myself, and focusing on the conversation I listened for Dumbledore's response. Everyone else seemed to have the same idea for the room suddenly fell silent.

"We do not know." I felt my eyebrows retreat into my hairline, Dumbledore always seemed to know everything that went on in his school, and if the Dark Mark had appeared obviously something happened. "No one was harmed, and nothing is out of order as far as we can tell." He sighed heavily.

"The only thing of any importance we know…" McGonagall trailed off looking towards Dumbledore to finish her statement.

"Several portraits were distraught, saying an ominous shadow appeared out of thin air by the statue of a hunchbacked one-eyed witch, before slinking towards the seventh floor, disappearing through a door that appeared after it walked by a portion of stone three times, only to reappear ten minutes later and disappear behind the witch again."

Everyone seemed to silently digest this information, I was confused what was you-know-who even doing, the three times the mark had appeared, no one had even been murdered, it was all very unusual.

"He knows of the secret passages!" Three voices yelled in shocked unison, as every head, including my own swiveled frantically from Dumbledore, to the stricken faces of Remus, Sirius, and James.

"Behind the hunchbacked one-eyed statue." James continued sounds of evident distress in his voice, "Is a passageway from the third floor corridor leading directly into the cellar of Honeydukes…Albus there are seven secret passageways leading from the school and her grounds to various residences in Hogsmeade."

I was dismayed there had been seven secret passageways leading off the grounds and into the town and I hadn't known of any of them? And how did those three know about them, when even Albus seemingly hadn't, though it was hard to tell with the Headmaster.

Stay focused. I mentally scolded myself; me not knowing passages was not what was important. The fact that you-know-who knew of them was.

"They must be protected Albus! For the safety of the children!" Molly Weasleys plump form piped in, "If he knows of one entrance…" She left the sentence hanging as she wrung her hands in her robes, worry written plainly on her face.

Every one seemed to know what she was implying; if he knows one entrance he could know them all.

"We will close them all off." Dumbledore gazed between the three men, "if one of you gentleman would be so kind as to return to the school with me when the meeting is adjourned to show us all the exits."

"I can come." Remus spoke quietly, he shook his sandy blonde hair sadly, "I should have informed you before, I am sorry." My heart went out to Remus he looked so tired, worn and almost ill today. His face was full of regret and self- loathing.

Dumbledore opened his wizened mouth to reply when he was cut off by Fleur Delacour, a gorgeous woman a year younger than me, she was a half-veela and her blonde hair shimmered as though the sun was directly behind her.

"Sorry Dumblydore but vat did ze portraits mean, 'bout zis shadow?" She questioned airily while tossing her hair over her shoulder as Bill Weasley gazed at her if she was a slice of heaven

I felt my eyes narrow how could she sound so flippant, this was obviously serious and here she was tossing her hair and casting flirtatious glances at another member, how dare they fall in love!

Whoa was I ever becoming bitter.

My thoughts started drifting to Harry again, before I mentally slapped myself, this meeting was important, Hogwarts had been infiltrated, and I wanted to hear about this shadow too.

"Mrs. Delacour, the portraits meant exactly what they said, the figure was indiscernible he stayed completely in the shadows, not quite invisible, but he blended so completely that he might as well have been. The only other thing they said about it when asked was that he struck fear into their painted hearts."

If I saw you-know-who fear would have struck me too. I couldn't blame the inanimate objects for fearing him.

"Was it he-who-must-not-be-named?" The eldest Weasley son asked politely, though I noticed he was sneaking glances at Fleur.

"Fear of a name only increases fear of the thing itself Mr. Weasley." And Voldemort should be feared I thought silently, he had definitely earned the right to be feared, the heartless, cold, and cruel monster, the only one crazy enough to say his name was Dumbledore, "Alas no, we are certain it was not Voldemort."

I flinched violently at the name; I would never understand how Dumbledore could say his name so easily, as if it were nothing.

"See I told y'all its just hooligans, copy-cats or what not, he aint back." So the slurring voice of Dung has graced us again.

"Have you not been listening?" Lily Potter spoke fiercely, emerald orbs blazing, "How can you not see the truth when it is glaring us in the face. Dumbledore" She paused before shooting a glance at the Headmaster, "Suspected V-V-Vol – _he_ was never even murdered and spoke to us." She reached her hand towards her husband as he wordlessly grabbed it, "After the World Cup over two years ago. Harry." She choked on the name, unable to continue, my eyes prickled; I couldn't take any more discussion on him today.

James cleared his throat, "Harry was the first to disappear five months after the first appearance of the Dark Mark, things cooled down after that, but what's happening lately, I think Dumbledore is right. HE is back whether you want to admit it or not."

There was silence for several heartbeats, Harry was a hard subject for the family and for them to bring it up at the order meeting and voice something that hadn't been spoken, Harry was the first, and we had forewarning at the cup and no one took notice, would obviously be difficult.

"It is odd though." I whispered, I slapped my hand over my mouth my hair flushing pink, I hadn't meant to voice that thought. Every single head in the room was staring at me, and Lily almost looked betrayed, I grimaced.

"What is odd Nymphadora?"

If Dumbledore wasn't the most powerful wizard in the last century I would have hexed him, but knowing better than to pick a fight with the 'Leader of the Light' I simply glared menacingly for a moment before speaking.

"Well." I hesitated not knowing how what I was going to say would go over. "I think the Dark Mark at the Cup was just a bunch of drunken idealists, wishing for the return of their _esteemed_ Master." I looked at Lily for a moment trying to catch her eye.

Once our gazes locked I continued, "Harry must have been the first." I spoke shakily, "He disappeared from his secure home in the middle of the night, but…these happenings." I gestured vaguely with my hands, "are what's odd."

The hurt look left Lily's eyes though now she looked at me questioningly, wondering where I was going. "How so?" she asked, her sweet voice was lowered but I knew it carried around the room.

"Well the Dark Mark over a muggle museum and nothing but some small golden cup went missing right?" Dumbledore nodded in affirmation, "Than that cottage in Little Hangleton that was simply destroyed, but nobody had lived there since the Gaunt's died, where we couldn't tell if anything was amiss. Of course there are the random disappearances after but I'm not talking about those." I paused to take a deep breath, "Than this morning, this 'shadow' stole into Hogwarts doing nothing but entering some random room than leaving. Its simply odd, from what I know of_ his_ first reign, the mark was usually cast when someone was murdered, I just don't understand is all."

I watched in consternation as his trademark twinkle returned to his eyes as if he had wanted someone to point out the inconsistency.

"The lass is right, how curious." Dedalus Diggle a usually jolly man stated his bearded face deep in contemplation. "Not like that tyrant at all, no killings under the mark…" he trailed off.

"Peculiar indeed." Sturgis Podmore stated as he rubbed his chin.

"'E's up to no good 'e is." _Well that's glaringly obvious._ I wanted to say to Hagrid, a dark lord, up to no good, yeah that was news.

"Albus you said you were sure it wasn't he-who-must-not-be-named at Hogwarts?" Moody's gruff voice questioned.

"I am positive Alastor."

"Than what if…it hasn't been him at all?" Several mouths opened in shock, mine included, Moody firmly believed that _he _was back, and now he was suggesting _he _wasn't the cause of all this? "Before you start yelling listen up." His one eye glared at the room in general as his magical eye rolled around, pausing briefly on everyone. "What if its simply this 'shadow' following orders, he doesn't seem to be too keen on killing randomly. I mean we know there were muggle guards at the museum, but they were left alone, and only random shadows could be seen on the tapes Arthur looked at." Moody briefly inclined his head to the director of the misuse for muggle artifacts office, "and if _he _had really infiltrated Hogwarts I think _he _would have attacked at least one of the wizards staying in residence over the summer."

"So you think it's this elusive 'shadow'?" Kingsley Shacklebolt, sitting next to me had leaned forward slightly during Mad-Eye's speech, his expression was keen, analyzing, and intrigued.

"Must be." Both of Moody's eyes settled on Kinsley's prone form, "You-know-who would have simply murdered all the muggles at the museum, probably killed or at least tortured some muggles in Little Hangleton, and would have surely tried to attack at least one sleeping professor this morning."

I leaned forward slightly, Mad-Eye's reasoning was sound and I was inclined to agree with him, that made sense, it didn't solve the question of what the hell was going on at all these places, but it was interesting to consider the fact that you-know-who had a new favorite lackey.

Though if he had become _his_ favorite minion I would definitely never want to meet him. I shivered involuntarily imagining how cruel, malevolent, malicious, someone must be to garner _his_ favor.

"It's suspicious." Remus muttered, and everyone's stares were redirected to the quiet man. Remus looked quickly around at everyone before settling on his friends James and Sirius who were sitting side-by-side staring at him, and urging him on silently, "There has been no talk among the werewolves in this district." He shifted uncomfortably, and I ached for him, I knew how it felt to be different. Not to the extent of Remus, but I could empathize better than some.

"If you-know-who is back he is not gathering followers." Some in the room sighed, in relief, I didn't, "at least not yet." And that is exactly why I had not sighed in relief, he would move, when he chose too, "and from all the attacks, well…. the scenes of the crimes I should say…it seems only one person is doing all these things, like Moody implied. So where are the other Death Eaters?"

No one knew how to answer.

"Severus has not been called." Dumbledore spoke his quiet authority cementing in our heads that whatever you-know-who was doing, was unorthodox, and unlike anything he had done in the past.

"Where is that greasy git anyways, we've been here for over an hour." James asked, his distaste for the potions master evident in his tone.

"James." Lily hissed as she reached over and thumped his forearm, he looked at her like she had committed some grand offence.

"What?" He asked innocently, too innocent, "I didn't even call him a name that time." I had to clench my lips together tightly to avoid laughing; the look on his face when he spoke was the epitome of youthful innocence and naivety, both of which were cleverly faked.

Sirius wasn't as controlled.

Lily simply glared at James for a moment, but he continued to look at her innocently, slowly her gaze softened as she muttered, "You did so you conceited oaf. Greasy git is a rude name."

"Naw Lils it's simply a fact!" Sirius chuckled, dodging his wife's hand as he sprung from his chair, "I'm off for a refreshment." He called as he sauntered into the kitchen. Strutting in a fashion that fractionally lightened the mood.

I smiled as my favorite cousin left behind a grumbling wife, one snickering best-friend, one annoyed redhead, and one friend attempting to look disapproving.

I glanced over at Peter, he was one of that circle, and I wanted to know how he reacted. I started as his beady eyes looked shiftily around the room as if expecting someone to jump out at him, he bore no semblance that he had even witnessed the exchange, he was fidgeting heavily, pulling at the sleeve of his black robe, he looked uncomfortable, and very worried. What the hell was wrong with him today?

I decided I would ask him if everything was all right later.

"James does have a point though." Lily interjected to the hush conversations that had sprung up around me, "where is Severus, he is the only member not present."

I noticed James glance disapprovingly at the concern in his wife's voice. I had no idea if Lily and Snape were friends or simply acquaintances but whatever it was it obviously irked James.

"He had returned to his home in Spinners end after the events of this morning-" the Weasley twins cut off Dumbledore.

"Sounds dreadfully-" George stated joyously.

"Dreary." Fred finished, smiling brightly, "I would surely hate-"

"To live in a place-"

"With such a horrendous name."

"Boys." Mrs. Weasleys tone of voice enforced no argument, but the twins merely smiled to each other before waving their hands towards Dumbledore, as if they were kings granting a peasant permission to speak. It looked rather silly.

Dumbledore simply smiled serenely continuing as if he had never stopped, "he knows we were meeting at the Potters tonight, but when I flooed him directly before I left for the meeting he was not at home."

The noteworthy roaring of a lion sounded through the manor, James, Lily, Remus, Peter, Alexa, and Dumbledore immediately stood. All of them suddenly alert James waved his wand in an intricate fashion muttering something, before the roaring died.

"The unauthorized apparation ward." he spoke rigidly as if he were expecting it to be someone out for the blood of his family. Giving the circumstances I could see why he was so tense.

There was nerve-racking silence, as we all seemed to be waiting for the first explosion to sound against the outer wards. The only sound besides the breathing in the dining room was the padding of feet across the hardwood floor.

"PADFOOT!" James yelled, "DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR!" As soon as James finished, I realized the padding of feet was Sirius walking towards the door, James began moving out of the room swiftly, only to halt as Sirius voice carried towards us.

"Merlin Snape, what happened to you?" his voice was muffled from the distance, but could still be heard.

"James you told me you included him in the wards for tonight!" Lily admonished, "You…" But whatever she was going to say was forgotten, as her voice trailing off, most likely for the same reason I was speechless.

Severus Snape limped into the room, favoring his right leg, his normally pallid skin tone was reduced to a greenish-gray tinge, there was a deep gash running from his left eyebrow to his chin, and there was caked blood allegedly coming from the corner of his mouth. Spatters of blood covered his disheveled black robes.

Snape must have noticed the looks of concern on all our faces for he simply sneered, though the affect was notably less than it should have been.

"Severus my friend, what has happened to you?" Dumbledore's concerned voice sounded from behind me, but I couldn't turn to look, I had _never_ seen Snape look so feeble. "Do you need medical attention?"

Snape scoffed, which caused him to cough slightly, "No." he scowled, looking condescendingly down his large hooked nose, his greasy locks hanging limply around his face. "I took some potions." I looked at him skeptically; he still looked pretty roughed up. "Seize looking at me like that this instant child." He sneered in my direction.

Well any sympathy I had felt for him just flew out the window, how he could be so insufferable all the bloody time was a conundrum.

"What happened to you Severus?" McGonagall questioned after a prolonged period of silence.

Snape's face darkened as his eyes narrowed, "Well for starters, the Dark Lord has officially returned." He drawled. If the matter was not so serious and I hadn't felt the crushing weight of reality, I would have shot a smug grin at the ten non-believers.

"He did this to you?" squeaked Peter. I glanced in his direction, his voice was certainly anomalous, and he was shaking slightly, though I seemed to be the only one paying attention to him, he looked incredibly fearful and seemed to survey how bad Snape's injuries as if they would magically appear on his own body.

I had no idea how three brave men like Sirius, James, and Remus, had befriended someone so skittish he reminded me of a rat.

Snape 's cold expression glared at the room, before adopting a malignant look, "Actually no." He drawled, pausing most likely to build tension. He was the dramatic sort with his swirling robes and self-aggrandizing attitude, and frankly his tactics were working.

But if you-know-who didn't do this to him, who the hell did? Severus was a Death Eater turned spy, and I knew he refused to take shit from anyone, including other Death Eaters.

"His protégé actually." I shuddered violently, just thinking of a person actually surpassing evil incarnates right hand and becoming his charge, his successor, it filled me with trepidation.

The silence after the shocked exclamations and shouts had seized was absolute, every member of the order looked towards our figurehead, you-know-who had finally called his Death Eaters, there was no guesswork anymore, a war was looming, hovering on the fringes of our society.

Dumbledore looked older, and more fatigued than I had ever seen him, "Protégé Severus?" His voice retained its quiet, strong calm but his countenance did not bode well for the light.

"Yes." Snape sneered, he covered his fear well, but a portion leaked through his mask, if Snape was afraid….

I didn't want to consider those types of ramifications.

"My boy, would you tell us what happened?"

"Very well." He spoke slowly staring directly at the headmaster, trademark sneer splashing his visage, "I was summoned, to a run-down cemetery, there were sixteen others that showed. The Dark Lord was furious; he heckled us for not looking for him after his 'murder', for lying to avoid incarceration, some tried to defend themselves, he simply crucio'd any who spoke."

It was really happening.

The thought struck me unawares, even though I had 'believed' it for a while, it was still difficult to comprehend that soon all of our lives would change. I realized for my entire harsh 'believing' deep down I was sill hoping it was just some _hooligans_. Wasn't losing Harry enough, fate and destiny were cruel sisters indeed.

I noticed my hair dulling to a melancholy gray-blue, I tried to morph it back to the shade of violet it had been before, but I felt so off kilter, I couldn't seem to force my powers to obey. I guess I would have to live with this depressing color until I could fully deal with this.

I would have thought it would be easier, knowing what was coming, with the three dark marks appearing and three – four disappearances, already goading at our heels.

It wasn't.

"When he finished his diatribe, he whined about how pitiful and despicable and disappointed we were as his servants, going on about how there was only one person who was truly worthy of standing with him against the felonies of the wizarding world."

"While he was speaking…" Snape trailed off, a slight tremor traveling his beaten frame, before steeling himself and continuing, I almost wanted to leave the room so as to not hear the rest of this. A person could only deal with so many emotions in one day.

"About the only one worthy, I realized there was some presence lurking in the shadows, the Dark Lord didn't give us any information about him, simply went off on how promising he was, and that once he reached maturity things would change."

"The boy…man I should say finally emerged from the shadows, he didn't cower, he stood tall proud and arrogantly." He hissed, his upper lip curling back in a snarl, "as if he owned us, was infinitely superior…. reminded me of someone actually."

Snape shot a piercing glare towards James Potter who stiffened, flushing red in anger, looking as if he was about to blow a casket. Dumbledore raising one of his aged hands slowly seemed to stop James' retort before it could even leave his lips.

"The Dark Lord put his hand on his shoulder, the man wore a cloak that was dark as night, and his face was hidden in shadows, but he practically preened under the praise. We all underestimated him." Snape sighed wearily, his composure slackening.

"Malfoy was the first, speaking down to the protégé, who immediately lashed out whipping out a sword and cutting the corner of Malfoy's mouth and dragging it sideways, opening his cheek. Malfoy screamed, the sword was dipped in poison, I know because it was used to make this cut on my face, no magic will heal it."

"The cloaked man laughed sardonically at Malfoy's angered expression and simply spat, "Why so serious? Smile your in the presence of your master." Before kicking Malfoy in the gut."

"I am not certain on what occurred next…Rockwood seemed startled at the voice of the cloaked man, and started blathering to our lord about something, I couldn't make out what he was trying to say, but the man did, he used his sword to cut of his tongue, whispering something in his ear that none of us could hear, before cursing him, silently."

"He turned his blood to acid and we all watched as it slowly ate his muscles, before eating his skin and all his inner organs. Somehow he kept Augustus alive until the last possible moment." I felt the bile rise in my throat, I didn't even know their was a curse that could do that, I closed my eyes trying to block out the sick feeling in my gut.

Big mistake.

Closing my eyes simply allowed me to picture an ominous massive shadow attacking everyone in site, even his own lackeys. You-know-who crucio'd his followers from what Snape had told us before; his protégé seemed to enjoy a more _personal _approach.

"The Dark Lord watched grinning happily, I…. I've never seen him smile like that. The rest of us remained silent, as he hissed something in parseltongue and his charge answered in kind."

My hand flew to my mouth to cover my gasp, another parselmouth! "He resumed speaking after a moment, he wants to gather followers, but refused to say much else, seems he's keeping his plans secret for now, but he told us to be on guard and when his charge reached majority, the wizarding world would be his."

"Obviously I wanted to know when he would reach maturity." Snape scowled much darker, as if he very much regretted that decision, looking at him I realized he probably regretted it more than he would say.

My head was reeling from everything Snape was telling us, he usually wasn't this talkative, he must have been much worse off than he looked, his usual comments to James and Sirius were absent, and his condescending tone, and haughty expression were severely flawed, and lacking the usual dramatics.

No one spoke even though Snape had been silent for several heartbeats; everyone was waiting in tense silence, dreading what he would say next, and tightening the fear that was being installed in our hearts from this mysterious 'shadow'.

His voice took on a detached tone as his eyes looked miles away, "When I asked, I didn't even have time to blink before he was before me, dragging the tip of his sword down my face, than using the butt of the sword to break my right knee, he had me on the ground before I could react, casting bone breaking curses before healing them, over and over all over my body, some he purposely healed wrong…"

Sympathy seized me, Snape may have been a bloody bastard, but that must have been incredibly painful, and if he let his guard slip and you-know-who read his mind, he would be killed.

Shortly after he finished speaking Dumbledore sent Snape back to Hogwarts so Madame Pomfrey could heal him properly, obviously his potions couldn't fix everything. The meeting continued but my brain had shut down, today was too much, I couldn't process any of this, I felt cold, I vainly wished for at least one ray of sunshine to slip through the clouds.

An hour later the meeting finally ended, I walked blindly not really seeing anything, I was sure some had congratulated me on completing my training, but it was so hard to hear them.

The only thing I could truly focus on was the fact that I wished Harry was here, to shield me from the cruelty of man. I was no pushover and I was no baby, I could fight and I was strong, but everyone needed someone to lean on when things seemed impossibly hard.

I barely noticed apparating into a side alley in muggle London, was hardly aware walking into the muggle apartment building I lived in, scarcely noticing entering my messy flat.

My surroundings were a blur as I collapsed in the dress robes I had been wearing all day, shoes and all, onto my queen bed, the cotton sheets scratching my bare wrists as I settled.

I could feel the waves dragging me under, the pressure crushing me as I allowed myself to give up, to be swept away, if only for tonight, wishing desperately for my personal hero to save me.

Tomorrow would be better.

**AN- I am an evil author! MWAHAHA! Giving you Tonks perspective TWO AND A HALF YEARS after Harry vanished, please don't hate me for not giving you what you so desperately crave! I know she's not as cheery as she is in the books but put your self in her shoes… IT WAS AN AWFUL DAY… the next chapter… maybe two if I get carried away will be Tonks perspective than it will go back to solely Harry. I just had a vision of how this one scene would play out from her perspective (coming next) and I didn't want it to be totally random, so this works much better! Also now no one really knows what's happening so it builds delicious tension!**

**P.S. things are not always as they seem ******** or maybe they are if you really read between the lines ;) **

**Also how did you like the way I wrote her? I found it much more difficult than writing my Harry, so let me know? Was it okay?**


	5. An Interesting Start To Any Career

**Disclaimer- Totally not mine, this brilliance belongs to JK Rowling, her publishers and Warner Brothers (who should stop being selfish and release the sixth movie already)**

**AN…Truly, I thank every one of you who has continued to review over my months of absence, your reviews mean more than you can possibly imagine. I apologize for my lengthy delay. Shortly after the fourth chapter was released a lot of personal issues surfaced and it was a rough time, no need to bore you with the details. I couldn't find the will to write. I'm back now, and never fear readers, never under no circumstances will this story be abandoned. P.S. The continued reviews really encouraged me to get back on the horse so to speak.**

**Tremendous thanks to Necraa who Beta'd this for me, so hopefully even the quality of the work will have improved over your wait!**

**Still Tonks…**

Royal blue.

The Auror robes clung and hung at the perfect places to allow for maximum movement without hindering the wearer. I made my face as plain as possible, while retaining enough of my own features to remain recognizable– I wanted to earn respect based on work ethic, not looks – my hair was two shades darker than my robes. After all, I couldn't be completely nondescript, could I?

That would be entirely out of character.

I strapped my wand in the generic holster for Auror's, which admittedly was the best on the market. That the ministry would pay for at least.

Today was my first day.

The first several months of an Auror's career were essentially the most important. New recruits needed a Mentor – someone to show them the ropes. Aid them with the transition from texts and book smarts to actually being on the force, where we would need to constantly think on our feet and improvise, while abiding by the laws.

If good impressions weren't made, and no senior took you under their wing, you were generally shoved to the side – forgotten, left to do paperwork and sit at a desk. If you got the right Mentor, you could go far. Therefore the entire procedure was terribly important and could either make or break an individual's career.

If you weren't picked up by the end of your first six months, chances were, you wouldn't be. The very thought of not being active or getting the dull assignments made me quiver in fear, and self-doubt.

What if I wasn't good enough?

I shook my head in consternation; I was being ridiculous.

Gathering myself, I took a deep breath, exhaled slowly and plastered a grin on my face. I would force the sun to shine today.

Without delaying further, I apparated myself to the Ladies' underground bathroom so I could, in turn, flush myself to work.

Surprisingly upon arriving I realized I was, in fact, alone in the grungy underground bathroom. Reaching deep into the bottomless and weightless pocket on my right side, I fished for my golden Ministry of Magic coin, muttering a long string of curses and profanities when I had yet to find the thick coin, even though my arm was in the pocket up to the elbow.

Really…did this pocket have to be so ridiculously large?

With an exclamation of glee, startling the plump, graying witch who had just entered the bathroom, my fingers grasped the coin. I slotted the coin in its designated slot, successfully unlocking the stall.

My nose wrinkled as I stepped into the toilet bowl, feeling the chill of the water, though it didn't reach me. One movement of my hand, with adequate pressure and the bowl swirled – bringing me down with it.

I was ejected, stumbling into an unexpected man, who must have been half-goblin he was so small in stature, and earning myself a fierce glare. 'Sorry, sorry.' I mumbled, the tips of my shoulder-length hair turning pink.

In response he bared his small teeth, clutching his briefcase closer and bustling off, caught in the tide of hurrying figures, all heading towards work.

Stepping out I was swept along the flow, the action was seamless, and I was just another face in the crowd. I wondered if this meant I should have some sudden epiphany, that I was a grown up now, starting my first real job. Should I feel different?

The only thing I felt was the churning in my gut – nerves.

I didn't need to register as along with my golden coin, I had been given a tag, with my full name – _a fact that pleased me to no end_, I thought rolling my eyes – my position and a random tidbit about me being Mentorless. If I thought the Ministry had a sense of humor I would say they were mocking the new recruits.

I had to wait for several lifts to come and go, before I was finally allowed to suck in my belly and squeeze into a small space. We were scrunched behind the golden grilles of the lift like sardines.

I had yet to see anyone I knew.

Someone had already pressed the Level Two button. The clattering was drowned by the meaningless chitchat of the others surrounding me.

'…bought my son a Twigger 90 for his birthday. Very fast, came with an inbuilt Warning Whistles and Self-Straightening brush. Flyte and Barker say it will soon replace the Nimbus series.' The man directly behind me said self-importantly.

'That broom was built for those with more money than sense.' His neighbor grumbled, causing me to chuckle lightly under my breath.

Harry used to say that, when the broom originally came out in the early 90's.

The twinge at the thought wasn't nearly as bad as my breakdown last week. It hurt, but I tried to separate myself from the pain. To force negative thoughts away, I refocused on the two talking behind me.

The first man sounded offended, 'you only say that, Shortbell, because _you_ bought your child a Bluebottle.'

'And what's wrong with that –I'd rather my Damien have an Anti-Burglar Buzzer on his broom then those useless gimmicks the Twigger 90 has.'

'Of course you would.' The first, still nameless, man replied, '_you_ haven't the money to buy your child the latest trend.'

'The Firebolt is the latest trend.' Shortbell, answered matter of fact, and then, to my great amusement, he made a noise of triumph. 'And at least my family's got sense!'

'Why you-'

The remainder of the first man's, impeding tirade was interrupting by the familiar cool female voice, 'The Department of Magical Law Enforcement.' The golden grilles shuddered and clanged open.

There wasn't time to steel myself, as the outward shove and inward push made for tangled mess of wizards and witches all busily trying to get to their varying destinations. Already this early in the morning inter-department memos were flying into the lift; clouding the top of them with white fluttering paper planes.

I followed the hustle and bustle as people slowly filtered off into their varying departments – Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office, Wizengamot Administration Services, and Improper Use of Magic Offices – leaving the last door at the end of the marbled hallway with a plaque in gold indicating it as the Auror Headquarters.

As soon as I opened the door, I darted behind it again, for several inter-department memos flew out. Not sure, exactly what I was supposed to do, I wandered aimlessly, looking around. The room was a series of open cubicles, both empty and filled – one for each Auror. Pictures of known Dark Wizards, maps, clippings from the Daily Prophet, and various other things lined the cubicles.

There were no signs or indications that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named had returned. Thinking on the conversation over brooms in the lift reminded me that _no one_ believed it.

And I was sure the Ministry would hide it for as long as possible.

Not for the first time I wondered why I wanted to work for a bunch of liars and schemers; for a series of self-serving witches and wizards who in reality had no care for our civilization, only their position therein.

I recognized Frank and Alice Longbottom, their cubicles next to each other as they talked in low whispers. Though I wanted to say hello, as fellow members of the Order of the Phoenix, we weren't suppose to draw attention to our affiliations.

The office seemed chaotic, loose paper stacks, littering the areas. To my dismay I noticed several wandering classmates of mine looking around as though lost in a forest. I was positive there was a similar look on my own face.

Again, the sorrow came.

James Potter was a legend. He and Sirius together were the best team the Auror department had _ever_ seen. Three years after the Potters emerged from hiding he was promoted to head of the Department with Sirius as his second-in-command. Mr. Potter was a leader. Under his command the Department had been thriving.

It didn't look anything like I had imagined. They seemed disorganized and unmotivated.

Rufus Scrimgeour – the man who had designs on running the Department and who had almost taken over three months ago – stepped from Mr. Potter's office.

His broad, slightly scarred frame, maneuvered with skill through the cubicles, though there was a noticeable limp. With a deep voice he garnered the attention of everyone in the room. 'Recruits, you've graduated and you're all eager to start your careers.' He surveyed the nine of us with narrowed eyes, 'yes?'

There was a chorus of agreement from my peers and I.

'I have a few words of advice for all of you.' His broad shoulders straightened as he adjusted his wire-rimmed spectacles. His battle-worn expression and graying tawny hair seemed to twitch in annoyance as all of us leaned in, eager for any words of wisdom. 'Get used to disappointment.

'None of you are worth a Knut to us at this moment in time. If we put you on the streets now you'd die.'

Everyone, including myself jerked back in shock.

A fellow classmate of mine, Finley Fishtrunks, better known as Fin, voiced my thoughts; crossing his arms over his barrel-like chest. 'We made it through training didn't we.' Fin, preened his semi attractive self as some of my peers patted him appreciatively on the back.

Scrimgeour sneered, looking down his nose at Fin, who despite his seemingly cocky attitude, visibly wilted. 'Yes, and despite what you'd like to tell yourselves that was under _controlled_ circumstances – there are no redo's and test scores in reality.'

'If Mad-Eye is what you call controlled, you're mental.' I muttered quietly.

I spoke at apparently the worst moment. My peers had been struck silent as they digested his _words of wisdom_ and the surrounding Auror's had been watching the proceedings. I noticed some of my peers attempting to stifle their laughter, and other Auror's laughing freely – to my embarrassment.

Scrimgeour, however, was far from amused. He went an interesting shade of red, opening his mouth to retort. Before he could say as much as a "by your leave" a roaring, boisterous laugh cut through the crowd.

I whirled around, as the door to the Department swung shut behind Sirius. 'Finders keepers!' He choked out through his laughter, approaching me with swift, long-legged, strides.

'You're late Black.' Scrimgeour growled.

'Ha! If you've got a problem with me take it up with the boss.' With mock shock, Sirius suddenly cried, 'oh, wait, since I'm your superior…I guess you'd just talk to me. Well I say it's fine and the boss is never late, his workers are simply early.'

Sirius swung his arm around my shoulder pulling me towards Mr. Potter's office.

Scrimgeour, who was, admittedly, fuming, snapped. 'I was giving the recruits a motivational speech!' I rolled my eyes; grateful my deep blue hair was blocking my blue eyes from view. 'She has to stay.'

'I'm… hmm, how to put this' Sirius looked thoughtful – he really was unethical for the second in command of the Auror Department. 'Taking her under my wing, so she no longer falls under general jurisdiction.'

My eyes widened as I jerked away from him, choking on the air I was breathing. He couldn't possibly be saying what I thought he was. 'Wha -' I took a good look at his handsome face, his eyes were full of sincerity. 'You – you're serious?' I whispered.

'She hasn't been here for half an hour!' Scrimgeour cried.

'There's nothing in the rules saying it can't be done.' Frank stated, rising from his seat beside his wife. Frank stood tall, though he was thin, you could tell the guy packed a punch. With short curly black hair and a large forehead, his face becoming consistently smaller ending in a pointed chin, with larger than average ears. Though he wasn't conventionally good-looking, there was something endearing about him.

Him and his wife were not very far behind James and Sirius on the legendary scale.

'Well said Frank.' Sirius replied jovially, rewrapping his arm around me, dragging me towards the office James shared (unconventionally) with him. Sirius leaned closer to my ear, whispering like he was given me a golden nugget of information, 'not that I've ever been one to follow the rules.'

A smile lingered on my lips, and I felt many of the nerves that had plagued me ebbing away. He grinned, his face lighting up and for a moment, you almost couldn't see the distant haunted look in his eyes.

Almost.

The day flew by, nothing of great interest occurring. Sirius showed me to my cubicle – one jammed in the corner; showed me the archives department, manned single handedly by Peter Pettigrew, the fourth leg in their quartet; introduced me to the majority of the Auror's that were in the office.

Several times over the course of the day, I tried to refuse Sirius offer of mentorship, worried it was a show of favoritism.

I had wanted to earn my position.

'Cuz, you may be family but you should know me better than that. You were top in your class.' His goatee quivered as he laughed openly, 'aside from stealth of course. But you really do have amazing potential. James and I needed to make sure you got a good Mentor – you're scores in concealment and disguise were off the charts. No one else can say the same. Not to mention your skills in both offensive and defensive magic. You're invaluable to this team.'

I was still unsure but he continued to placate my fears.

'Look, lil cuz, I've never mentored anyone, I don't take this lightly…I'm serious.' His face took on a determined glint that reminded me off his expression during the last Order meeting. 'And don't think I'll take it easy on you either.'

There was no use arguing with him. And truthfully, I was more than slightly relieved. I had been so afraid of being pushed to the wayside I had never considered the fact that it was possible for me to be chosen. Let alone first.

My peers were envious, only Clarissa remained honestly kind. Deep down, I worried, even though Sirius had attempted to reassure me, that this was favoritism. I knew that I needed to prove myself to him, no, not only to him, to the entire team.

I would be the bug under a magnifying spell. Everyone scrutinizing me, here would be no room for mistakes or worse, failure.

The eagle owl quill brushed my chin as I leaned over the thick parchment as I completed paperwork. It was rather uninteresting, a report on Sirius' last "excursion" as he called it. A drunken, I checked his name again, Ferb Waldor, had been provoking muggles on some decrepit street in the slums of London.

A part of me couldn't help but remember how unaware of You-Know-Who's return everyone was. That the second in command was busying himself with something so seemingly trivial, when there was so much more to do, was a testament to their blindness. What would working in the Auror Department look like after the truth was revealed? Of course there were still Dark Wizards roaming about that they consistently caught but the last few months it had been meaningless ventures, idiotic drunks, for example.

It was just the calm before the storm.

It took me several moments to realize I'd paused, quill suspended in the air, dripping ink into an unattractive splash in the middle of the report. Bugger, I would need to redo this now.

With a great sigh, I reached for a new piece of parchment, not paying attention to the barren walls of my cubicle. I had just re-inked my quill, and written the day's date at the top of the scroll when Sirius yelled my name, 'Auror Tonks!'

His voice was frantic. So very unlike Sirius that it chilled me.

Without a thought I dropped the quill, ignoring the way it splattered the formerly pristine scroll, before tumbling to the floor. The sound of it snapping could be heard as I scrambled towards the office, stepping on the expensive quill in my haste.

James stood, fire in his eyes along with Sirius who was pacing frantically.

'Yes, sir?' I questioned, my voice determined and calm.

Two pairs of hazel eyes turned on me, both hard and churning with fury and determination. The two seasoned friends exchanged one lingering glance before they turned away, ignoring me.

Sirius turned towards the large fireplace situated in the room; with his wand he cajoled the weak fire currently burning into a roaring flame. James, on the other hand, began shouting orders.

'Longbottom! Longbottom! You're coming with me – there's an attack on Grimmauld Place. Scrimgeour, you're temporarily in charge!'

I gulped; Sirius lived on Grimmauld Place. Only the past three years of character aptitude tests and having my teachers try and break me enabled me to refrain from panicking. So much for a calm first day.

If Sirius went anywhere, so did I. It was a rule of having a Mentor – until they declared you prepared.

The only reoccurring thought in my mind was that Alexa, Orion and Rosalie were okay. They just _had_ to be.

Frank and Alice and James closed the door behind them, the latter absentmindedly activating the privacy wards around his office. 'We go under the Ministry's authority, but this is Order business.' James voice was hard and determined, no sign of panic or worry.

'Death Eaters – has _he_ gathered them?' Alice inquired, her battle face firmly rooted, her expression fierce.

'Why would he attack Grimmauld place first? There must be some underhanded plot to it all.' Frank's shoulders were back, and if for one moment I had thought his wife's expression fierce…she had nothing on him.

Sirius had taken his cue from the other senior members; though his family was the one in question he seemed as unfazed as if it were some Muggle family. He was only determined to help; his emotions were turned off as easily as I cast a first year spell.

This was different from his tone when I had first entered.

If I hadn't known these four, as I did, there was no possible way one could have known how important this mission was to their hearts.

Somehow I remained calm, but worry for my cousins was hard to ignore and I wondered how they did it. Stayed calm. When I knew they were all burning inside.

Maybe seconds had passed but it felt like an eternity.

'No.' James, flopping black hair shook, his temples were graying – I had never noticed before. 'Not Death Eaters-'

'Just one.' Sirius snarled; his teeth bared, looking very much like a wild, angered dog.

My breath caught on a startled gasp.

Merlin.

My voice wavered, 'no – not-'

'The Shadow.' James affirmed. He allowed a moment for Frank, Alice and I to regain our bearings, a moment in which stretched both forever and ended before I could blink.

What would the Shadow be doing at Grimmauld place……whatever you-know-who was planning seemed ludicrous. There was no rhyme or reason. No plot. No set goal. It was all so random.

And I was terrified to go, though there were five of us and one of him. You-Know-Who wouldn't have been afraid of the five of us…I doubted the fear of his protégé. We knew not his strengths or weaknesses – if he had any of the latter.

He was an unknown, and the unknown was always worse.

Frank and Alice were lingering on Sirius; the tension of knowing the only wizarding family on that street bore heavily on the room. Like a thick swirling fog where you can barely see your own outstretched hand, it blanketed the office with dread.

'James! We have to go!' Sirius snapped, loosing some of his composure.

James stared at his best friend, second-in-command, and partner. Suddenly he blinked, 'he's in the house, Alexa and the twins are hiding in a secret compartment in the wall.' I wondered how they knew that. Then figured Sirius and her must have a secret way of communicating. 'We need to apparate-'

'Too long, James!' Sirius yelled his goatee twitching, 'I'm going now – this is my _family_.'

'You'll only harm them by rushing in.' Frank stated.

'We need a plan.' The fierceness in Alice's sweet voice was both exciting and frightening.

James seemed detached, though the worry and fire had yet to leave his eyes. He said nothing as Sirius grabbed a handful of floo powder and threw it in the grate. For the hundredth and certainly not the last time, I despaired over the broken family and its shattered members. Who had been so very high and fallen so very far.

'The Shadow has yet to come of age, he is a boy - there is no need for a plan.' I shook my head in denial, there had to be something about him that struck fear into the hearts of any who met him.

Merlin, the _paintings_ had been afraid of him. Not to mention You-Know-Who's inner circle itself.

To my distress, Sirius' words seemed to strike chords in the other three adults. Certain arrogance settled over them, as if they were all thinking the same thing.

'The boy has yet to face anyone besides his masters' sycophantic fools. And then he had said master at his back.' James fumed, angered at his own folly, for actually seeing this faceless nameless person as a threat. The fire flared brilliant green as Sirius disappeared. 'I will stand at your side, as always.' He muttered to himself, 'follow quickly; search the house until you find the chicken. He _will_ be brought down today.'

The fire flared again and the head of our department was gone.

Frank followed soon after, 'the child never faced anyone at Hogwarts due to his fear.' His jaw was locked and his eyes blazed. Alice was quick after her husband, casting one small encouraging smile in my direction.

I hesitated, every comment they uttered, felt more like self-assurance. I didn't think any of them believed what they said.

Merlin, this was it, wasn't it?

Mentally I scolded my self for my hesitance, shoving the sinking feeling in my gut that we were making a grave mistake in underestimating our enemy. The four legendary Auror's were on my side.

I had difficulty understanding my hesitance; after all, this was my dream job.

So what was I doing standing in this office?

Nothing.

Slapping myself, I stepped into the fire, chucking the gritty powder in my hands into the grate. The fire flared to life and I whirled, grate after grate, house after house, through London towards Grimmauld.

I stumbled on my exit, quickly righting myself, my body finally alert with the senses I had tuned within myself to excel in my chosen field. Finally the fear and worry and feelings of wrongness departed.

I was an Auror.

And I _would_ be a damned good one.

The sounds of a battle could be heard coming from upstairs. I sprinted up through narrow hallways and staircases, running past rooms. My eyes taking in burn marks on the walls, portraits askew – some dislodged all together – all too fearful to do anything other than point in the direction of the wreckage. Rooms were open and ransacked, like some great search had taken place.

Presumably, before we arrived.

My brows furrowed in thought, but I kept running. I gulped when my eyes met the sight of Alice splayed on the ground, blood trickling from a gash in her arm. Immediately I stopped, checking her with a quick spell.

She was pale, yet her heart was still quite strong. She was stunned.

Only.

What sort of game was this? Death Eaters didn't stun…they killed.

Muffled shouting could be heard and with a quick glance back at Alice I continued on, she would be all right.

Frank was crumpled at the door to the attic. My stomach plummeted further. But I would not falter.

'Who _are_ you!' Sirius shouted, angrily, 'what business does your master have at my house.' He spat venomously.

'Speak, you wretched excuse for life!' James shouted; there was strain evident in his voice. And finally I was in a position to see.

The room was bathed in Technicolor. Red, purple, blue, yellow, and green shot around the room, colliding with random paraphernalia – all of which exploded, burned or imploded upon impact.

James and Sirius held their position by the far wall; James a fierce look of determination on his face and Sirius grinning like the infamous Cheshire cat. The hairs all over my body stood on end from the pulsating energy of their spells.

They played off each other's strengths and the years of camaraderie between them were evident in the seamlessness of their movements.

My brow wrinkled in confusion as my eyes scanned the room. Where was their opponent?

I continued to look, I found plenty of shadows – the room was a space full of the distorted elongated shapes - yet was unable to locate the Shadow.

However, I could feel his presence in the room. Something akin to a dark sinister sense of danger; freezing cold water that makes you shiver, helplessly; a primal sense of fear and an urge to flee.

I realized, in all probability, I couldn't find his position because there was absolutely no return fire.

James and Sirius exchanged a look.

Sirius barked out a laugh – lacking all sense of humor but holding a heaping of anticipation – right before he threw his body sideways, rolling to the left. Eight bone-shattering curses shot from his wand in quick succession, faster than I could say the spell. James, on the other hand, braced himself and fired a skin-shrinking curse with an abundance of power.

His spell cleaved through two of Sirius spells – my gasp was inaudible, but I was amazed by the power behind James curse, to simply slice through spells like that…

I was at a loss for words.

And then I saw him.

My heart stopped, before recommencing in a stuttering staccato, the rhythm uneven and strange as it thudded without mercy.

The Shadow disappeared, melting into an unseen miasma, leaving not but a swirl of dust behind him, as seven spells sliced through his former position. They exploded against a large picture of Walburga Black, who screamed shrilly as she was blasted into tiny shards.

My eyes snapped to James as he choked. The Shadow stood before him, a being of unmatchable grace and fluidity. As he moved with ease, his black cloak swirling around him like fog as he dodged fluidly from the spell Sirius shot at him.

It was fairly close range, and my stomach churned violently when the realization that no human should be able to move that way floated through my mind.

Sirius shot the counter curse at James, before whipping around and shooting a flurry of spells at the Shadow.

He twisted and bent, ducked and jumped, melted and reappeared – a series of too quick, too perfect, alien movements. He was wholly unpredictable.

'Shoot back you sniveling coward!' Sirius yelled, 'or are you afraid?' Sirius threw his head back to laugh.

It cost him.

A dark purple, bone-shatterer flew at Sirius. The sound of grinding bone made me cringe. Sirius cursed heavily – the pinky on his left hand flopped. The bones in the digit had been reduced to nothing but shards, making the limb no more useful than a limp noodle.

It also snapped me back from the precipice between reality and imagination.

I had been standing; gaping like a bloody fool for the entire time this encounter had been occurring. My mentor's hair was clinging to his forehead in damp tendrils; James was favoring his left side, his face still an unnatural shade of red, his chest heaving.

James never faltered, 'you alright?'

'I'm bloody well fine, that bastard won't be.' Sirius growled.

I knew exactly what to do, to apprehend _our_ opponent. 'Hey, you stupid blundering wanker!' I shouted, drawing the focus of everyone in the room.

The wizard all in black, whipped around before the first two words of my sentence had finished. I forced myself to finish, hoping James and Sirius could utilize my distraction – from the other side of the room – to their advantage.

The Shadow made no move against me.

I shouted '_STUPEFY_!'

His hand twitched infinitesimally, dispelling my spell with ease. I felt a heavy gaze coming from him, and it chilled me to my very bones, while simultaneously setting me on fire. My mind burned with anger at being dispelled so easily like I was no more than a child.

My eyes narrowed in rage and determination as I settled in to add myself to this uneven battle. Though which side was the underdog, I hadn't yet decided. Before I could blink, Sirius and James shot cutting curses at his back.

He dodged the first, but James' sliced through the back of his cloak, I saw the blood splatter the ground, as the Shadows back bowed. I could imagine his face a silent mask of pain, though he uttered no sound.

James was half bent over, panting from lack of oxygen and exertion, glaring at the still standing figure. The Shadow, almost quicker than my eye could follow, spun around and shot two perfectly aimed stunners at James and Sirius at impossible speeds. The two of them fell to the ground, their faces a mixture of shock and disbelief as they barely even had time to comprehend the red light flying at them before they were laid out.

The Shadow's body shook, the last move had evidently cost him. He didn't fall to his knees as expected but balanced haphazardly on shaky legs. The air distorted around my ear as the body-locking curse whizzed past. I barely avoided contact.

'What sort of Death Eater are you? Throwing Stunners!' I cried, dodging another stunner and sending another cutting curse his way. It was no time for mercy when I was alone against him. Weakened or not.

Honestly I was surprised James' spell wasn't causing him _more_ pain. He _should_ have been in absolute agony.

He whispered something, so quietly I didn't hear him.

'What was that?' He didn't respond. 'Why do you hide your face?' I was trying to distract him; I knew I was no match for him. I wouldn't underestimate him.

I could barely hear my own voice, over the incessant beating of my chest. He could hear it, I was positive of that.

Belatedly I realized so far I was only distracting myself.

Angered, and feeling spiteful I spat, 'is it because you have a face so horrendous not even a mother could love?' There was mock sympathy in my voice. 'Or, perhaps it's that, you hide your face so no one knows who you are because you're afraid they will _hate_ you!'

He faltered and the edge of my latest bludgeoning curse caught the fabric of his hood, ripping and shredding it, exposing half of his face. It was blurred from the lingering effects of what I now assumed was a shadow spell; chiseled features, strong jaw, perpetually messy black hair, a vivid green eye: Harry Potter.

My wand clattered to the floor as my body went limp. Before my mind had even processed the sight before me, his stunner collided with my chest and the world went black.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

'Why isn't she waking up?' The voice was heard from a distance, like a scream echoing across the mass of a great body of water, distorted and wobbly.

'I don't know, I enervated her…' the second, distinctly female voice trailed off worriedly.

I tried to speak, but every muscle in my body felt like leaded weights. I was acutely aware of my breathing, as natural as it was, because of the effort my body was exerting to continue the task. My heart was sluggish as it beat inconsistently, as though it was under great strain. Behind my eyelids was a swirl of colors, rolling in and over each other, again and again.

Something wasn't right.

My thoughts floated and danced before me, yet every time I reached for one it disintegrated, as inconsequential as a mirage, through my fingers. It was like catching wind; harder than it sounded.

'Prongs, Dumbledore or the Ministry first?' It was the first voice again, deep…and familiar.

The silence stretched as I tried to come back to myself, to find any purchase in this black miasma smothering me. 'Dumbledore, we'll need an Order meeting tonight…' the sound of a heavy, weighted breath boomed in my ears. 'That…thing…'

'Was lucky.' The voice I know recognized as Sirius' interjected, 'that thing couldn't even use spells above fourth year – don't give me that look Alexa – I'll admit he's quick, but he was no match for us.' Even I heard the undeniable confidence in his voice.

I could feel myself drifting closer, slowly but surely. Finally I was aware of a set of hands touching me, seemingly checking my temperature and pulse like they didn't want to believe the wands reading.

'Then why,' the female's voice was high, presumably in distress, 'were all of you lying on your backs when I came out after the sounds of fighting stopped.'

'Luck. He's lucky, that's all.'

'Stop.' The other voice…James, possibly, spoke. His voice was tired and old, leaving him on a heavy sigh, 'what's wrong with her?'

'Nothing, so far as I can tell.'

'Why don't we dump a bucket of cold water on her head? That ought to wake her up.' Sirius laughed, the sound forced. 'Always worked with Wormtail.' The sound of flesh smacking flesh would have startled me – if my body were capable of such an action at this time. 'What was that for woman! That really hurt, that time.'

'Sometimes I wonder why I married you…' the feminine voice mumbled quietly, albeit jokingly. Since she was close to where I presumed my ear to be, I was the only one who heard.

'The house is worse for wear.' A new male voice interrupted, two sets of footsteps vibrating the floor upon which I rested. I was aware enough to recognize it as Frank's. 'But I can't tell if anything was stolen. You'll have to look through everything.'

'My kids?'

'In their rooms…had to give them calming draughts.'

A doglike snarl erupted from Sirius, 'I'll kill him.'

'We don't even know _who_ he is.' James sighed, disappointed in him self. I had a feeling he was imagining himself a failure for letting us all down. The worst aspect was even if I could have, I wouldn't be able to offer reassurance – we had all failed.

'I'll not have you talking of killing anyone.' Alexa spoke fiercely, 'you'll not be going to Azkaban.'

'But-'

'NO! And that is final.'

And then, suddenly, everything around me refocused, my eyes snapped open and my body jerked as James statement sunk into my brain and the horror engulfed me. I sat up, moving with the jerking of my torso, gasping for air, unsure whether to cry out in joy or scream in disgust.

Which of the two were more appropriate?

I was swamped in heavy relief yet burdened with a new sense of betrayal. By Merlin, I had no idea how I was supposed to feel.

I was the receptor of five curious and concerned gazes. All of them surrounded me in a disjointed circle; Alexa was kneeled beside me, bracing me in an upright position. My eyes connected with the head of my Department and I recoiled, scrambling away from him as if he were You-Know-Who himself.

My heart couldn't maintain a rhythm, hammering both fast and slow; my breath came in spurts, lending to the dizzy feeling in my body from lack of oxygen; with one arm I gripped the cavernous hole in my chest, to hold myself together; my stomach churned with the gripping urge to spill its contents: I knew why my body hadn't wanted to wake.

As a defense mechanism it had shut down to spare me this revelation. Seeing the face of James Potter only worsened the feeling. The same chiseled features and strong jaw and perpetually messy hair gave some idea of what _he_ might look like when _he_ aged, though there was enough of _his_ mother in _him_ to make _him_ look even better.

'Harry.' I breathed, my vision blurring, distorting their concerned faces. 'Merlin, no, not like this.' The natural grip I held over my metamorphmagus abilities was lost, my hair and eyes were cycling through all the colors of the rainbow in varying shades.

'D'you think she hit her head?' Frank asked.

'Possibly.' His wife answered, her face full of pity.

Alexa, Sirius and James – the latter's more pronounced – faces were masks of pain, sympathy and regret.

'No, it's me James, Mr. Potter.' He choked out; idly I noticed his arm was healed, only the blood signifying that he had been hurt.

'The day's almost over, you take the rest of it off, all right.' Sirius hand rested on James shoulder. 'You can file your report tomorrow.' A small smile took hold of his face, 'I'm warning you, since your family, tomorrow I'll be harder on you. After all today's only your first day.' He chuckled.

He was alone in his amusement, just as I was alone in my knowledge.

Regardless, I was positive I took the award for most eventful first day on the job in history.

But my mind couldn't think on that I had to tell them. 'Harry…it-' I couldn't say it. Uttering the words out loud seemed to make them so much worse. My mind whirled in circles and, admittedly, a large part of my being was gripping to the hope that I had imagined it.

Hadn't I imagined it last week as well?

I nodded, encouraging myself on this train of thought. I hardly noticed the concerned glances the others in the room were sporting.

'Maybe she's in need of a calming draught as well – do you have more downstairs?' Alice directed her comment to Alexa who was slowly edging closer to me.

'Tonks, sweetheart, no, it's James, your boss.' Alexa urged, her grey eyes alight with concern as her short dirty blond hair swayed, 'remember him?'

'I know…who Mr. Potter is.' I whispered, finally ashamed for acting like a weak child in front of my superiors. I had trained for this, hadn't I? I shouldn't be so easily rattled.

Taking a deep breath, and forcing all feelings into a decrepit black box in the dark recesses of my mind, I steeled myself. Finally detached from the emotions I couldn't make sense of.

They were all waiting.

I was glad Moody wasn't here. He wouldn't have shown as much patience. Though I realized, that if I were anyone else, James and the others wouldn't have been offering this much courtesy either.

'We need to call an Order meeting tonight.' The words were out of my mouth before I remembered they had already decided on such a course. 'Dumbledore, we need to see him right now.' My voice was somewhat robotic from the emotionless quality of it.

'That's already been decided.' I nodded at Frank, finally standing up and resorting my robes. My hair and eye color finally settling.

'What I mean is, I know who the Shadow is.' My detached gaze fell to James, not leaving his as his face contorted in confusion.

'Ah, yes the new girl, the last one standing. Brings back memories of the World Cup…' Alexa's laughing voice quieted as the recollection of who had told that particular story with such exuberance, occurred to her. She coughed uncomfortably.

Even after two and a half years he had such a hold on all of our hearts.

And in my detached state, one emotion seeped through, one burned stronger, so fierce in its determination no amount of control could contain it. Anger.

My voice scratched as it burned in fury, my hair flashing vibrant red. 'Harry Potter.'

The hope that I had been wrong, was flayed and burned at the stake, with less sympathy then the muggles offered when they rejoiced in burning witches at the stake all those years ago.

No one spoke.

'Harry Potter _is_ the Shadow. I saw his face.'

Instantly James face twisted in absolute fury, for a moment I believed it was for the same reason as mine. Until he thrust his wand, threateningly in my direction, 'do not,' he spat, spittle flying from his lips, 'insult my family's honor. My son is dead.'

'Watch what you say, cousin or not, I will stand behind the Potters.' Sirius snarled, his lip curling back.

I stared between the furious gazes of the two men, brothers in all but blood. My eyes traveled to the other three in the room; they seemed disgusted by my accusation. There was no doubt in any of their minds that I was wrong.

I could see any attempt at reasoning would be brushed aside.

'Very well then.' My voice oozed with indifference, though my emotions grappled and shook the walls of their prison.

With a swirl I whipped around, storming from the room, ignoring the shouts called after me, they rolled off my back like water rolls off a duck's feathers.

The wreckage and disorder in the ancestral home of the Black's didn't penetrate the determined haze that sheltered me.

Without preamble I exited their residence and squeezed myself through the uncomfortable tube that is apparation. The imposing turrets and towers of Hogwarts loomed ahead as I appeared at the massive wrought iron gate with its two winged boars standing as stone sentinels, guarding the entrance.

Though, apparently, as I was reminded from the last Order meeting, this wasn't the sole entrance. Curiously, I wondered if Lupin along with Dumbledore had sealed off all others yet.

I sent my familiar patronus with a brief message to Dumbledore. The thoughts in my head were reminiscent of a herd of Jarvey's – the incessantly annoying, overgrown ferrets who were only capable of uttering rude phrases and insults. The most scathing of insults competed in my head for dominance as my emotions began to unravel.

I was too angry to feel hurt; too betrayed to feel sad; too disbelieving to comprehend reality. The emotions swirling within reminded me of the darkest storm England has ever seen, multiplied by twenty.

The gates swung open, creaking as the massive form of Hagrid, with his heavy black beard and boat-sized shoes, stood of the side, eager to greet me. ''Ello. Wat brings you 'ere on this fine day?'

'Order business Hagrid.' He nodded, his bright smile, half hidden by his slightly singed beard.

I looked skeptically at it, wondering what kind of _adorable_ creature he had to thank for that. Catching the direction of my gaze, he walked with me, chattering ceaselessly of a new hybrid he was working on.

Apparently, we were looking at a cross between an ashwinder and a mackled malaclaw. I tried hiding my grimace at the thought of what kind of creature that would create – glowing red eyes with eggs that could set houses on fire while its bite would give everyone bad luck. Not to mention the site of such a thing, half snake half lobster.

'Now _that's_ what I call an enchanting creature.' Sarcasm dripped from my tone like milk from a carton.

Hagrid, as awful as it was to say, was too dense to notice. He took everything at face value. The half-giant slapped his hand to my back, causing me to loose my already precarious footing and fall forward. 'Bit clumsy aren't ya?' He laughed, helping me to my feet. 'If ya like, y'are welcome to see me new pets. Ya seem to 'ave a likin' for 'em.'

His expression was wrought with earnestness.

I looked away, 'another time, Hagrid.'

'Ya jus' be sure to send word. Make a mean rock cake, if I say so meself.' His barrel chest puffed out, stretching the already tight fabric of his oversized coat.

Unbidden a memory of Harry complaining of the groundskeepers rock cakes being more rock than cake and how one had nearly broken his jaw clouded my mind for a moment.

It was enough.

The fury churned anew, my pace quickened. Now I was practically running through the halls. If Hagrid noticed he said nothing, just continued to prattle on about the goings on of summer at Hogwarts.

Soon, we reached the seventh floor; curious portraits followed our progression with watchful eyes and mindless chatter between them. The statue of a gargoyle, stood imposing and impressive at the end of the corridor.

I reached the gargoyle before Hagrid, surprisingly. 'Bit of a rush are ye?' He chuckled, his beard twitching with amusement. Apparently, my expression betrayed my impatience, 'ton-tongue toffee.'

Despite myself I snorted; that was one of the candies released by Weasley Wizarding Wheezes. Last year the twins had opened a joke shop in Diagon Alley – they were all the rage right now.

Though there was many a speculation on where the twins got the money to start their business in the first place, they were quite tight-lipped about the whole affair.

The gargoyle leapt aside, and the wall behind it split to reveal a spiral stone staircase. Hagrid left me with a cheerful farewell as I stepped into the door and onto the first step. I was startled when the staircase began revolving slowly, bringing me upwards, as the gargoyles entrance closed behind me.

A new emotion crept along the edges of my mind like the shadows lengthening as the day progresses. Nervousness, despite the anger, betrayal and the vortex of negative emotions swirling within me, I knew by telling the Headmaster what I had seen, there would be a warrant out for _his_ head.

Metaphorically, of course.

_We_ weren't the dark side.

Knowing the consequences of my actions, I couldn't help but feel I was playing the part of traitor – as twisted as that may be.

I nearly lost my dinner at the sight of a highly polished oak door with a brass knocker in the shape of a griffin. Was I making a mistake?

I hesitated.

'Come in, Nymphadora.' The wizened voice of the greatest wizard since Merlin himself, beckoned me forward.

I was too awed by his knowledge of his own castle – as every student past and present can attest to – to correct him for the use of _that_ hated name.

My parents suffered from one moment of insanity and I was due to suffer the pains of it for the rest of my days. How tragically unfair was that?

The oak door opened into a large and beautiful circular room with windows, one of which faced the Quidditch pitch and the other facing east with a view of the surrounding mountains. The candlelight was low in the room as the sun was just setting casting the great office in an orange glow.

The walls of the office, covered with portraits of previous Headmasters and Headmistresses, were alive with their moving images and curious gazes, though some of them were feigning sleep.

Dumbledore sat in his high-backed chair at his enormous, claw-footed, highly polished desk; the surface of which was littered with papers and a silver inkpot with a handsome scarlet quill.

Briefly my eyes flickered around, trying to absorb all the sights as quickly as possibly. I had never been to the Headmaster's office before. On a shelf I spotted the relaxing sorting hat – most likely composing next years song; Gryffindor's sword was kept in a glass case beside the aforementioned hat.

There were a number of spindly-legged tables supporting various, curious silver instruments, that seemed to whir and emit little puffs of smoke at random. They were intriguing.

Dumbledore allowed me to peruse his office silently, his bespectacled gaze with his twinkling blue eyes watching me intently.

'Sir, I-' the feeling I was a traitor, choked my vocal chords. Shifting uncomfortably I cast my eyes away.

'Lemon drop?' He offered congenially, I shook my head in the negative.

Abruptly the livid cloud that had carried me with such determination fled from me with the swiftness of a snidget trying to escape unwanted captures. I fell into the visitor's chair before the Headmasters desk, gripping the hole in my chest as the tears clouded my vision.

None of them fell. They simply made seeing impossible.

'Are you well my dear?' Dumbledore asked in concern, again I shook my head. 'Alas, child, I am unable to help you unless you tell me the cause of your distress.'

My mouth opened, the only sound emerging from my trembling lips was a string of squeaks and moans. I felt pathetic for being so weak. Calling upon my training and strength I stuttered out the words I needed to say. 'Have you – a – a pen – pensieve…sir?'

Showing him would be easier then verbally relaying the information.

Dumbledore stood with a powerful grace, despite his age, his eclectic purple robes with stars and moons swirling as he walked towards a golden perch. I deduced it was the home of his currently absent Phoenix, Fawkes. Beside the perch a closed black cabinet stood, which Dumbledore preceded to open.

A plethora of vials lined the walls of the cabinet, which emitted an ethereal silver glow from the light of the pensieve. Dumbledore, carrying the stone receptacle covered in mystic runes, sat himself at the desk again, setting the basin down in some free space. The content in the liquid rolled like storm clouds, neither liquid nor glass and the sight was inexplicably beautiful.

After an encouraging nod from the headmaster, I removed my 11-inch rowan wand – good for defensive magic – from its holster, placing the tip to my temple. Concentrating on the memory I wished to extract, slowly a thin thread of silvery liquid emerged from the line of my hair.

Once satisfied, I dropped the ribbon thin memory into the swirling mass of liquid as it churned. A picture of the hallway with Frank Longbottom sprawled at the door greeted us from its hazy, dreamlike, picture in the bowl.

HPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHPHP

'My baby boy! You hurt him James!' Lily cried, her eyes red-rimmed and bloodshot from heavy tears and inconsolable sobbing. I wasn't sure whether her tears were from relief or anger.

It was impossible to tell for any of us.

Honestly, I don't think any of us – even though it was my third time and Dumbledore's second time of watching it – knew how to feel.

James, Sirius, Alexa, Frank, Alice – all those who were present at the time of the battle – along with Remus, Peter and Lily were all cramped in Dumbledore's office to bare witness to this unlikely discovery. There was to be a meeting in an hour's time, to relay the information to the remainder of the Order.

We had finished viewing the memory half an hour ago, and still Lily was the only one who would speak.

She continued, looking frantically between her husband and Dumbledore. 'He's under the imperious, I know my son,' she implored, begging them – us all – to see reason. 'That wasn't him, there's a reason for this.' She trailed off muttering to James only, 'I always knew he was alive, James he's alright, _our son_.'

Suddenly louder, she continued, 'we have to save him. Dumbledore,' – she turned her pleading green orbs to the aged man behind his claw-foot desk – 'please, conceive a plan tonight – who knows what they're doing to him!'

'STOP IT LILY!' James roared, his unreadable expression shattering to betray his fury. 'That _boy_ is no son of mine…or yours.'

Lily shot from her chair, her face igniting with indignation, 'how can you not recognize him, that's my Harry!'

'I know very well who he is.' James growled, 'I can recognize my kin, but he is no longer a member of our family. I'll burn him from our line.'

It was the wrong thing to say, for the love of a mother – Lily in particular – overshadowed her love for her husband. She slapped him, hard, across the face, causing all in the room to wince.

A large red-print splashed the left side of James pale face.

Lily stared breathing hard, before she crumpled, falling into James lap, lightly stroking his shocked features, murmuring her apologies over and over again. Slowly James reached a hand up to soothe her, running his hand along her shivering back, whispering quietly in her ear, through the set rigidness of his jaw.

Peter was fidgeting in the corner, an expression on his face of clearly wishing he was anywhere but here; Dumbledore seemed serene but the twinkle in his blue eyes was uncharacteristically missing, his mouth beneath his beard set in a frown; Frank and Alice, knuckles were white from gripping each other, but their eyes betrayed their disgust at finding out one of the prominent light family's heir was You-Know-Who's second in command; Sirius seemed shocked, too struck to react with his intimidating temper; Alexa was understandably distressed; Remus looked thoughtful: the underlying theme to all of our emotions?

Betrayal.

A heavy sense of it hung around our necks like nooses.

'I'm…baffled.' Sirius finally spoke over the continuous murmuring of the Potter's, 'how could…'

'If I may.' Remus interrupted, his sandy blonde hair, peppering with gray hung limply against his face, and he looked worn and tired, deep bags under his eyes. 'Lily, James,' – the two, reluctantly, emerged from their cocoon – 'there are certain inconsistencies I've noticed with Severus' tale and the memory we just watched.'

'That's redundant.' Frank shook his head; 'of course there are inconsistencies, before we didn't know his face.' His eyes fell to James.

It was as if a tangible rip in the fabric of the relationships in this room could be heard. The accusation in Frank's eyes seemed to eat at the Potter pride. James shifted, looking at his wife and set his jaw, glaring back at Frank. 'I believe, Remus, you were speaking before you were so _rudely_ interrupted.'

So James has decided to retain a visage of a united family front in public. Who knew how he really felt. Merlin I didn't know how _I_ really felt.

Remus played with his own fingers as he looked us all in the eye, 'Severus,' – Sirius coughed something sounding like _Snivellus_, to which Remus' eyes narrowed, but he continued as though uninterrupted – 'described him as a sardonic, cruel man, delighting in the pain of others yet Ha- the man in the pensieve used only stunners and harmless curses that would have nevertheless stilted your movement.

'When he did use higher level harming curses – like the one we saw in James memory, where his arm was injured – it seemed, to me as though he purposefully missed.'

'Ruling out the imperious.' Frank sneered, turning his countenance into something uglier than usual.

Despite Franks comment, I could feel the hope alighting within as I grasped onto Remus words, clinging to them like a bubblehead charm two hundred feet under water. The observation was obvious; moreover, hadn't I noticed beforehand that it seemed as though he was holding back…

'Useful observations, you always had a keen mind Remus.' Dumbledore's eyes sparked, 'I had noticed myself he seemed to be holding back, though I feared it was only the hopeful wishes of an old man.' Dumbledore readjusted his half-moon spectacles.

I tried not to scoff; Dumbledore would have known exactly what he was seeing. He just enjoyed watching others come to such discoveries on their own.

'Holding back!' Sirius stumbled over his words as he tried to rise from his conjured chair, his wife's constant grip on his shoulder keeping him down. 'He invaded my house, bested all of us, he-'

'Left you all alive when he could have easily killed the lot of you.' Lily interjected quietly.

'Do you think he wanted me to remember, it was him?' I questioned looking towards Lily, realizing that as well as being in a position to easily eliminate us, altering my memory would have been just as simple.

'Perhaps, the child is in need of saving.' Dumbledore answered, his eyes twinkling madly. Fawkes seated, in all his brilliant plumage and dignity, trilled several beautiful notes, tending to the hope I knew was in my heart.

'You're all blinded by your caring of the boy! Snape himself relayed he was You-Know-Who's second in command, that upon his coming of age – which we now at least know is July 31st, which I remind you is but a week away – he will take our world! There is no coercion or threat keeping him there. He earned his position; he _wants_ to be there.'

We all fell silent and there was a sense of the hope seeping through the cracks, as the metaphorical light dimmed.

Lily remained resolute, 'there is an explanation! My son is-'

'The apple of your eye, perfect, we all know you _think_ that Lily.' Alice shook her head in pity.

'Don't you speak ill of my godson!' Sirius cried, shaking off Alexa's hand and taking two menacing steps toward the seated Longbottom's – I was also glaring at them, I wanted to cling to my hope.

Frank stood his face set in determination, 'you all know, deep down, even if you're too afraid to see the truth, that your child is dark, consorting with You-Know-who, he's his protégé for Merlin's sake!'

'I-' Sirius' mouth gaped, his handsome face contorted in displeasure, when he realized that none of us had anything to say to that. The two men stood chests heaving as they stared imperiously at each other.

Each individual – aside from the Longbottom's – were torn between what we knew was the only explanation and what we wanted to believe. I myself couldn't reconcile the boy I knew with the man I saw. The disjointed pieces of the puzzles at my feet baffled me. There were too many questions along with too few answers.

And each answer only stirred new questions.

'While Frank-' Dumbledore's, undoubtedly sage advice, was cut short by the ringing of the fireplace.

A house elf, with blue, tennis ball eyes popped into the room and in its squeaky high-pitched voice addressed the Headmaster, with a low bow, his long nose scraping across the floor. 'Master Dumblydores sirs, a Misters Grengrasses wishing entries to youse offices.'

'Thank you Doley, your services are greatly appreciated.' He replied with a nod, his long white beard and hair bobbing with the movement.

'Master is much toose kind.' The elf finished disappearing with another pop.

The tense atmosphere in the office only intensified as Dumbledore flicked his wrist, allowing access to his fireplace.

Without waiting more than seconds, a curvaceous figure emerged. Immediately I recognized her as Daphne Greengrass, with her long brown hair and cunning blue eyes. She had certainly grown into her own in the years.

Another girl bearing familial resemblance to Daphne though with auburn hair and dark eyes, followed. Finally Hyperion Greengrass, the head of the pureblooded family emerged, with all the dignity of a monarch.

I wondered where Mrs. Greengrass was.

The three of them were spared of soot from the fireplace, but their fine robes were disheveled, hair messy, cuts and the beginnings of bruises were forming on their bare skin. The three eyes – one set of blue, and two dark obsidian – were of steel and their faces were blank.

Pure Slytherin.

'Thank you for your gracious hospitality at our time of need, Dumbledore.' Mr. Greengrass stood, his back rigid and straight, his aristocratic features, softened by his aging years, though his auburn hair had yet to grey.

'You come to me in your time of need?' Dumbledore asked inquiringly, the question laced with hidden meaning, for everyone knew that the Greengrass' along with others, such as the Zabini's, consistently remained neutral, 'make yourself comfortable.' He uttered, conjuring three fine chairs for the new arrivals.

Mr. Greengrass nodded slowly, if his pride was hurt by this it was impossible to tell, 'it seems as though the time of decision has come. No longer is neutrality an accepted course.' Vaguely, it occurred to me to think on whether he was ashamed to say this in front of so many witnesses. 'I come asking for protection for me and my kin, in exchange I offer you information.'

'We would offer your family protection without the need of information, Hyperion.' Dumbledore replied, after the Slytherin suggestion made by the pureblooded man before him.

'My family will be seen as equals not cowards, I wish to join your side.'

'Alas, there are no sides, as there is no opposition.' It was evident to all in the room that Dumbledore was prodding Mr. Greengrass, wanting the reason for his abrupt change of heart.

'The Dark Lord has returned.' Dumbledore nodded; my gaze turned to Daphne who stared straight ahead unseeing, an expression of detachment upon her face much like her younger sister. 'Today, he forced my hand.'

'He's acting already, but we should have had more time.' Sirius interjected, earning himself a shushing from his wife and a disapproving glance from Dumbledore.

'That would explain their disheveled appearances.' James muttered.

'Please, continue Hyperion.' Dumbledore offered, 'lemon drop?'

Daphne scoffed, glancing at him disdainfully her eyes bright with unshed tears.

'He swept into our Manor unannounced.' – his lip curled back at the unannounced part, as though he had expected warning; my brows furrowed in thought – 'saying if we weren't with him we were against him, it came as a shock to my family that he had returned as they had no idea-'

'They?' Sirius grabbed onto the same word nagging at my conscious, 'did you know then Greengrass that _he_ had returned?' Greengrass sneered, his expression vastly superior.

'Sirius, that is enough.' Dumbledore shook his head in that grandfatherly manner of his. Sirius in turn, looked properly ashamed, though he made no word of apology. 'My apologies for the interruption, my friend.'

Mr. Greengrass' dark obsidian eyes, returned to those familiar twinkling blue, his voice steely, 'we were given a choice, when we refused, remaining adamant that our line had always remained neutral, his three accompanying Death Eaters attacked.

'My wife and I protected the children, as we retreated to the hidden door with our emergency floo. It was only luck that enabled us to escape. My wife was felled by the Avada Kedavra curse flying from his own hand as she dove to protect our youngest, Astoria.'

My sharp intake of breath was lost among others as comprehension of the brightness of their eyes was revealed. They had just lost their mother. Yet none of them showed any indication of loss as they hid behind their masks.

'If there is anything we can do for you-'

'I'll be joining the Order of the Phoenix…thank you.' Even Dumbledore, in all his omniscience, was taken aback by Mr. Greengrass' easy statement.

The only difference is while the rest of us floundered and gaped Dumbledore regained his composure with ease, almost as if he expected the man to know about our secret – or not as secret as previously thought – organization.

I brushed the thought aside, immediately, that would be silly. He was just as shocked as the rest of us.

'I heard you know of a Metamorphagus.'

'Why?' I snapped, worried over his need of me, and finally realizing there may be more to this bargain than met the eye.

Dark obsidian eyes, slowly moved towards me, perusing slowly over me like a man buying meat for his family – how much can I get out of it? I shivered, not liking the calculating gleam on his otherwise expressionless face. 'You then?'

'Why in Merlin's name do you need her?' Sirius interrupted for a third time, 'if you want anything from her, it has to go through me first, since I am her Mentor.'

Mr. Greengrass' lip curled back infinitesimally, 'aren't there rules for mentoring your own kin at work, Black?'

Angrily Sirius retorted, 'she was a good candidate for mentorship. Period, I'll not be having one of _you_ interfering with matters in _my_ office.'

'Potter's office, you mean. Don't you Black, or has your inflated ego clouded your perception of reality yet again.'

My cousin snarled, lunging at the seated man. James grabbed at the back of his robe, hauling his friend back. He whispered something quietly in Sirius ear, calming the head of the Black family instantly.

'Dumbledore, I wish to speak to you, Potter and the Metamorphagus alone.' His tone betrayed the unsaid fact that he would not be speaking otherwise making his wish more on the lines of a demand.

Amid many a protestation, the others left leaving only Dumbledore, James, Mr. Greengrass, his daughters and I in the room.

'I assume you have a proposition?' Dumbledore asked, knowingly.

'I have a certain…interest, shall we say, in a particular member of the Dark Lord's circle, who has betrayed me severely costing me my wife. He _will_ answer for it.' Mr. Greengrass' eyes were narrowed as he glared, eyes full of fire and hatred.

Apparently this was news to his daughters as they gazed at him curiously, before seemingly remembering themselves and hiding all of their emotions.

'Just how much do you know about _his_ rise?' I blurted.

Mr. Greengrass looked down his nose at me, 'more than you, I daresay.'

'Bloody git.' James muttered quietly beside me, I knew I was the only one to hear; my smile was hard pressed to be stifled.

'I am interested, to know how you come by your information,' Dumbledore continued, his expression inviting – I rolled my eyes, so far we had yet to learn anything relevant, besides You-Know-Who's impatience – 'my sources-'

'Your spy, you mean.' Dumbledore showed no signs of being startled at the interruption coming from Daphne Greengrass.

I wasn't as schooled. My face betrayed my surprise at her perceptiveness.

'Should your children really be included in this discussion Greengrass?' James asked. How could he be so calm in the face of what we learned today? His countenance was all business.

'This has much to do with Daphne and _I_ don't keep pertinent information from _my_ children that will affect their lives.' James recoiled like he'd been punched.

I looked between the three elders in the room, feeling the tense, unspoken words flittering between their heavy accusing, baffled gazes, yet not understanding the cause. What had James ever kept from his children that held any relevance?

Finally I turned to Daphne who was gazing coolly at her younger sister, Astoria. I wondered how she had ever attracted…

_Best not to think on that right now_, I scolded myself.

'I need someone – and this is why I come to you, Dumbledore – to pose as my eldest. Polyjuice would be noticed, but no one can detect a Metamorphagus.'

'Why would you need someone to pose as your daughter?' James asked.

'Father.' Daphne, looked concernedly at her parent, 'whatever it is I am perfectly capable of acting as myself.'

Mr. Greengrass ignored them all, not even looking at me – the girl he wished to use. 'I know where the Dark Lord is. I want your Metamorphagus,' – _the Metamorphagus has a name_, I sneered internally – 'to pose as my daughter, saying that she doesn't agree with my decision and earn the trust of as many there possible to bring me back information. Since my informant has officially joined _his_ side.'

'Bloody hell! You're wanting to send me into a pit of bloodthirsty chimeras!' I screeched, the portraits that were clearly eavesdropping, jerked back at the volume.

'Worse than that, in my opinion,' James muttered, before raising his voice, 'Dumbledore tell Greengrass he's being foolish, Tonks is new to the force, a covert job like that could take months and what would we do with the real Daphne. Tonks is being mentored, she needs Sirius on all her-'

'Than might I suggest,' Mr. Greengrass cut James off, earning a fierce glare, 'Black declare her as ready.'

'It was her first day today!' James shouted.

I couldn't help but think of what a tumultuous first day it had been, definitely more than I had bargained for.

'She's our only hope of getting in undiscovered, Potter. She got top marks in her class, she doesn't need Black, we all know the unofficial Mentor program is useless anyway, all of you just want to have lackeys to kick around for several months.' He sneered, with great dignity.

I was affronted at what he suggested, the Mentor program could make or break an Auror's career, who was he – besides an uppity pureblood – to say otherwise. As far as I know the man lived off his inheritance, he probably hadn't worked a day in his life.

James visibly bristled, his wand twitching in his hand. 'You _know_ it's more than that!'

'Do I?' he mocked.

'Refrain from insulting my department, Greengrass!'

'You mean the one slipping under your unstable guidance?'

'Enough.' Dumbledore's quiet voice was firm, carrying enough authority to halt both men in their pissing contest. 'Hyperion, I do have sources in the inner circle, this really isn't necessary-'

'Ha!' James shouted in triumph.

'-To discuss. Not to mention the grievous danger it would put Nymphadora in.' Dumbledore continued, his face passive and his tone serene.

'Don't call me _Nymphadora_…Headmaster.' I growled, my hair flashing red.

Dumbledore smiled, unmoved by my retort.

And then a sudden thought occurred to me, rekindling the simmering fury, effectively bringing the emotion to a boil. 'You don't think I can do it. Go undercover and spy for the light.'

My gaze traveled accusingly between Dumbledore and James. The latter spoke first, looking me straight in the eye, 'you could be undercover for months – until the start of term at least – twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. It's too much, too soon. As your superior I forbid you to consider this further.'

It wasn't even that I wanted to be amongst You-Know-Who and his followers, it was more the thought that no one believed in me. I was good enough to do this, and they needed to see that, 'this is Order business, its ultimately Dumbledore's decision.'

James reddened at my blatant disrespect for his authority, 'Considering the task would cut into your duties and time at work it _is_ my business.'

'Nymphadora,' I growled under my breath, 'you must consider the consequences of your choices, do not make a rash decision in your eagerness to prove yourself.' If I didn't hold an abundance of respect for Albus Dumbledore I would have hexed him for his continual disregard to abide by my wishes and cease using my vile name.

'I can do this!'

'We already have reliable plants in his inner circle, child.'

'_Snape_ is hardly reliable or trustworthy!' James spat. I paid him no mind, as I stared intently into the face of the Headmaster, though effectively his harsh comment only stirred my pit of desire.

'I can do this, I want to help anyway I can. We need answers, and possibly uncover the no doubt nefarious plots that so far seem to be written in some undiscovered language they make so little sense!' I begged the Headmaster, pleading with my eyes; I wanted to feel useful. '_Please_.'

Dumbledore scanned my face, seemingly searching for something. Fawkes, who had remained a silent guardian in the corner of the room, trilled his agreement to the Headmaster. With a heavy sigh, Dumbledore nodded, 'very well, child, but there are to be many rules and stipulations, all for your protection. I only allow this as it is in the interest of the greater good.'

'Of course.' I quickly agreed, both excited and daunted by the responsibility that was too be placed upon my young shoulders.

'Albus, you can't be serious – Greengrass, this is ludicrous,' James looked between the two determined faces, 'I won't allow it, as the Head of the Auror Department-'

'Potter you know I outrank you.' Mr. Greengrass said with a superior smirk.

I looked between the two in confusion, James was head of the Auror Department his superior was Amelia Bones – head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement – and then the Minister. There was no one else above that.

Most surprising of all, was James quick, albeit disgruntled, acceptance, 'I know not of that of which you speak.' He gritted through his teeth.

The sentence itself hinted at incomprehension but the fashion and the quieting of his protests relayed the significance behind the words. With a start and an incredulous glance at Mr. Greengrass I realized he was one of the Unspeakables. He must have been either second in command or head of the department to outrank James.

That was…impressive, to say the least.

'Father, why me?' Daphne interrupted, forcing herself to appear uninterested in the answer. She was good, I had to give her that, though I was suffering difficulties, trying to recall if she'd always been this cold.

'It is perfect timing to use you; any one else would arouse suspicion. Besides, Harry's always had a particular fondness for you. If I recall correctly the two of you are still together, considering it was never officially finished between the two of you.'

The name was slipped in so casually and inconsequentially that it took all the occupants in the room several moments before any of us realized the implications of what he had said.

A.N - Thank you all for reading! Read and Review, if you're curious about Mr. Greengrass name Hyperion, as I'll admit to its strangeness, it's actually from the HP LEXICON. Astoria (who is actually also in Canon) marries Draco Malfoy and their son Scorpius Malfoy's middle name is actually Hyperion. I figured his middle name could have come from Astoria's father…so yeah. Random tidbit right there!


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